Hey Y’all I'm new here!

Personal Details:

Born 1964, 100% Gay Bottom, Big Horny Hairy Bearded Bear, Weight 220lbs (~100kg), Height 5’11” (~180cm), WASP (White Anglo-Saxon Pagan)

My Story:

I'm 60 years old and completely impotent. I work in the heavy commercial construction trade; it is very hazardous work. When I was young, through my own carelessness, I'd been hit hard in the crotch on multiple occasions which caused considerable internal nerve and vascular damage. I came close to losing my testicles a couple times. I began having progressive erectile dysfunction in my 30s and I've been completely impotent since about 45. Thirty years ago I had two surgeries to attempt to correct the problem but they seemed to make my condition worse.

My penis has atrophied to about half its former healthy flaccid size; from 5in (~13cm) to less than 2.5in (~6cm). And, it has lost well over half of its sensation. I hate my useless little cock; this slowly dying nub of flesh. For the last 2.5 years I’ve kept my cock inverted and locked with a flat chastity cage; I take it off only once a week to wash thoroughly and immediately put it back on. I enjoy nude recreation and always wear the flat cage in those venues. So, I’ve been living essentially cockless for a while. I can still ejaculate with prostate stimulation. I really don’t “shoot” a load, it just releases and dribbles out. I’m horny a lot of the time, not being able to easily masturbate. It would be a relief to lose my testicles and lower my sex-drive.

I discovered BME about 20 years ago and was intrigued by the pictures of men who chose to have a penectomy, castration, or nullification. I’d previously read articles about those but this was the first time I actually saw the results, and I loved it! I knew right away this is something I would consider in the future. Now is the time for me: I’m dead serious about wanting a penectomy. More and more I’m leaning toward nullo. But, I’d still want to maintain a very masculine appearance with some limited male hormone replacement.

I love the idea of going to the nude beaches and resorts and appearing as a masculine male with no genitals between my legs. My regular sexual partners agree and support my desire.

Today, I read through some good stories in the Eunuch World Story Archive. I think I’ll attempt my own fiction based on my favorite fantasies.

Welcome and glad to have more fiction contributions - just remember that all those stories are FICTION - mostly not medically sound, and definitely not suggested DIY methods... (You probably don't need to be told that, but...)

Have you done much looking into the process of how to reach your goals? I can certainly relate to the frustration of being non-functional (due to SCI in my case, but I had the same sort of shrinkage... I want to keep what's left as I need it to cath, but can understand why you might want to get rid of it entirely...) I went through the SOC v8 process, and found it slow, but relatively low hassle, and am now coming up on my first neuterversary in a few weeks...

If you haven't already done so, I'd suggest getting a copy of the SOC v8 off the WPATH website, and reading it, especially the eunuch chapter, then find your local Trans-Gender center and start talking with them about what they will want in order to get yourself fixed... (Good news - this approach is often covered by insurance, so has minimal costs)

Alternatively there is "medical tourism", which is more expensive but can be easier to get in terms of jumping through hoops. Many of our members have had very good experiences w/ Dr. A in Mexico...

Good luck on your journey,

WheelyFixed

Welcome to the zoo.

Thank you for the kind welcome! I didn’t know what to expect. I’m no newbie to message boards and chat-rooms, so on a first post I always expect the worse.

Your advice on the eunuch fiction being fiction is well received. I’m grateful for your concern that readers do not attempt DIY castrations. Most of what I’ve read in the fiction archive, so far, in reality would have ended very badly. But, as with all erotic fiction, or any fantasy/fiction for that matter, you have to suspend your disbelief for awhile and just enjoy the fantasy for what it is. I’ve written some gay erotic fantasy-fiction for Gay Demon with good results. The EW link to the Story Guidelines thread is dead, but I’m familiar enough with proper formatting that I don’t think I’ll have a problem.

Following your advice I went to the WPATH website and downloaded a SOC v8. I look forward to a careful read through Chapter 9, beginning on page 90, pertaining to Eunuchs.

So far in my journey, I’m in very open discussions with my primary care physician who is also gay and very Trans supportive. He assured me I’m not alone in identifying as a Eunuch and desiring the surgery. I’m scheduled to see a Psychologist specializing in transgender care on November 6th. The Doctor warned me that the administrative process could be painfully slow.

Yes, I’ve already found Dr Ivan Aguilar at The Mexico Transgender Center in Guadalajara. I’ve heard good things about them, and their procedures and pricing seem reasonable. This is my backup plan.

Thank you again for your kindness,

ImpotentDaddyBear

Hello, and thank you! I think I'll be well at home it this zoo.