Its commonly known that castration kills the sex drive but how does it affect the desire for a romantic companion?

I cannot speak from first hand experience so I hesitate to say anything, but I do have some experience with chemically castrating myself for a period of four or five months. Many years ago I posted my experiences from that time, but I cannot begin to search for that post, it is at least ten years old by now.

First, I think I need to repeat and say once again something that is so often repeated here and said again and again.... "Your mileage may vary." Every person is unique, and the way they experience something is unique to them, simply put, some people love anchovies on their pizza, some hate the very same anchovies. So it is only reasonable that some people who go through castration will NOT feel about it the same way at I did, I will go even further, my own experiences were NOT very much like almost all other accounts I have read here in that I did NOT go through a severe depression, but then again I was chemically castrating myself by my own choice and what I did was not permanent like surgical castration.

All that said and now out of the way, and to finally get to your question,

After only a few days of feeling not sex drive at all, and being totally unable to get an erection with any porn or fantasies, I did notice that I really have a very very strong desire to be with someone. Every once in a while my emotions would hit hard like a baseball bat and I would remember something that had happened maybe a month earlier and I suddenly would realize something I did might have hurt someone else's feelings and I would be momentarily obsessed with setting things right again with someone. I guess that would be described as a momentary attack of stupid, maudlin, sappy feelings, like listening to Barry Manilow music.... "oh Mandy you came and you gave.... " and "Lola, with faded feathers in her hair...."

There were some nights that I so strongly wanted someone, hell I would have settled for anyone, just someone to sleep next to me. Truly, I was actually very lucky that nobody came along and took advantage of my desperate emotional needs at that time.

So, from my own limited experience, the loss of sex drive actually caused a great increase in my emotional need for companionship, I would have given everything I owned for a woman who could have shown me some understanding at that time, and oddly, I now can see that I was actually very lucky that I did not find anyone just then, I would have almost certainly have been hyper-dependent and too vulnerable.

Interesting post. Thanks Deacon.

truthbringer (imported) wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:27 pm Its commonly known that castration kills the sex drive but how does it affect the desire for a romantic companion?

From the point of view of the romantic gay. To women the inclination practically disappeared. With guys there were more serious relations, but in the form of games. They liked lack of details at me. Lived together in youth hostel, rented apartment, for example, when moving to other city. The truth in my case after some relations the partners after all switched to women, married, invited me to wedding ceremonies as friend. I always rejoiced to their family happiness, tried to avoid with them doubtful contacts.

truthbringer (imported) wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:27 pm Its commonly known that castration kills the sex drive but how does it affect the desire for a romantic companion?

"Common knowledge" strikes again! Castration diminishes the sex drive in most - but not all - men. It does not kill it and a percentage of men such as myself maintain a healthy sex life, albeit modified, after castration and without testosterone replacement.

So like another poster I can only speak from my own personal experience. In the five years since I was castrated I was on TRT for about a year and have been on estradiol for almost a year. In the three years without hormone replacement I maintained a reasonable interest in both sex and romance for a middle aged man That is to say that work and other stresses played a dominant role in my libido far more than hormones.

As far as feeling romantic towards my wife nothing changed regardless of hormone therapy. I will say that I became a more patient and attentive partner and could enjoy the romantic aspect of sex without actually engaging in what we normally call "sex".

seanthomas (imported) wrote: Tue Apr 20, 2021 6:55 am Castration diminishes the sex drive in most - but not all - men. It does not kill it and a percentage of men such as myself maintain a healthy sex life, albeit modified, after castration and without testosterone replacement.[...] As far as feeling romantic towards my wife nothing changed regardless of hormone therapy.

Nine months after castration and without any testosterone replacement, my experience is similar: although my libido is greatly reduced, I still have, with increased effort, an enjoyable sex life. My romantic feelings towards my wife have not changed. Transition has relieved much of my gender dysphoria and I feel better about my life.

It is commonly thought that "sex drive" is physical and mostly has to do with hormone levels. And it is commonly accepted that sex can happen without romance.

so we consider sex to be physical and romance to be mental/emotional. Granted, emotion is very subjective and often effected by hormones flowing through the body.

after castration/nullification, and the physical healing of the trauma to my body, It didn't take very many months before my male hormones were seriously depleted. With greatly depleted (what we call sex hormones) I had no desire for physical sex in any form. Nor did I experience any desire for romance.

Then after a couple years, (maybe 1 & 1/2 years) some attributes of lack of hormones began showing up in my body. It became apparent that the body indeed needed some amount of hormones to stay at healthy levels of strength and endurance. So I began the entire experiment of female hormones. That didn't produce any physical desire for physical sex. It did however begin physical changes in my body. The beginnings of secondary female attributes being developed such as redistribution of body fat and the development of breasts as well as lessening of body hair. Well, we all know about those sort of changes so I need go no further in describing them. However, after a few years of constant input of female hormones in my body I began to notice a change in my feelings. I associate feeling as something mental rather than physical. Which is when I began to notice a building desire for companionship. Companionship becomes a part of romantic feelings when acted upon and as time went on I did indeed develop romantic relationships. As well, those relationships developed with my changing body (through the constant input of female hormones) to the point that I had a new view and experience of physical sex. All of this developed into the ability to enjoy romance as well as sex. Take what you like from my observations and hopefully it helps to answer the question.

Begoneboy (imported) wrote: Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:55 am It is commonly thought that "sex drive" is physical and mostly has to do with hormone levels. And it is commonly accepted that sex can happen without romance.

so we consider sex to be physical and romance to be mental/emotional. Granted, emotion is very subjective and often effected by hormones flowing through the body.

after castration/nullification, and the physical healing of the trauma to my body, It didn't take very many months before my male hormones were seriously depleted. With greatly depleted (what we call sex hormones) I had no desire for physical sex in any form. Nor did I experience any desire for romance... All of this developed into the ability to enjoy romance as well as sex. Take what you like from my observations and hopefully it helps to answer the question.

Interesting, would u say u were romantic before when ur male hormones were unaltered or did getting rid of them literally get rid of the desire only for it to come back when u took the female ones?

truthbringer (imported) wrote: Sat Apr 24, 2021 5:40 am Interesting, would u say u were romantic before when ur male hormones were unaltered or did getting rid of them literally get rid of the desire only for it to come back when u took the female ones?

Good question. I don't recall the feelings of desire for romantic relations before becoming nullo. Never experienced

those sort of feelings until years of taking estogens.