Riverwind, who’s on the big island in Hawaii, sent me the following news account from Florida. He noted that it’s a different ‘Jesus,’ but he did note the name. Take it as a cautionary tale: there are easier ways to join the Eunuch Archive than by raping a pit bull.

FLORIDA: MAN EMASCULATED DURING FAILED ATTEMPT TO RAPE PIT BULL

November 14, 2020

Miami, FL | A 37-year-old man suffering some very serious groin injuries after being bitten by a pit bull, was admitted at the Ryder Trauma Center, this morning. Jesus Ramon Sanchez, from the Little Havana neighborhood in Miami, was allegedly attempting to engage in sexual intercourse with a 4-year-old male pit bull when the dog defended itself by tearing off the man’s genitals with its teeth.

The incident took place around 8:30 this morning, in the Allen Morris Dog Park in Miami. According to witnesses, 4-year-old Spanky was playing with his owner in the park when Mister Sanchez grabbed him and attempted to rape him. The male pit bull violently resisted and severely injured its attacker’s legs, arms, and groin.

“The dog was just running around, playing with a ball, when the man came out of nowhere and tried to grab it,” says Dorothy Steinberg, a witness of the events. Mr. Sanchez was bleeding abundantly during his transport to the Ryder Trauma Center, but the doctors were able to stabilize him and they no longer fear for his life.

Unfortunately, despite tremendous efforts, the medical staff wasn’t able to save his genitals, which were almost entirely destroyed by the dog.

The motivations behind Mr. Sanchez’s actions remain unclear, and he could still face some criminal charges since the Miami Police Department has opened an investigation into the incident.

https://www.newsbreak.com/florida/miami ... e-pit-bull

Raping a male predator, even if it is a dog, is always a bad idea... unless you are about to commit suicide.

But as we know Florida-man is a special kind of men, and almost every insane story starts with this "title".

��. So that has to go on the list of dangerous ways to diy above elastrator surely.

Here doggy doggy

Florida Man.

It's always Florida Man.

There's even a forum on Reddit named r/Floridaman to collect "his" antics.

Here doggy doggy

I'm picturing a tug-of-war... hmmm.... so, I was jogging thru the park with the head of my dong casually swinging out of the bottom of my shorts. The dog attacks without warning, grabbing and pulling. It's female owner is helping me by grabbing the root of my dick and trying to pull it back from her dog's grasp.

This is one of those crazy hot scenes only I can imagine lmao

Thanks, studied one more idiomatic turn: Lmao = laughing my ass off .

Is the dog okay? My worry is they would do something to the dog for defending himself.

Can you imagine answering the question every time someone say your missisng junk and had to explain the loss that a male dog castrated you for trying to rape it.

My own pitbull, sadly, cannot be around other male dogs, as I've been unable to guarantee his good behavior around them (I've tried for a long time, it ain't happening)…

… except for Charlie, a goofy little snub-nosed ratter of a dog my friend owns. My dog's 60 pounds; Charlie is about 20; they are both 'whole' (not neutered). Charlie came for the first time when Keter (my dog) was drugged up from dental work at the vet (broke a tooth on a frozen deer femur treat he chewed on during winter outside). This somehow made them friends.

One time, and only once, Charlie tried to hump Keter. As soon as he mounted him, Keter just snapped his head up and froze for a second, like he was making sure Charlie was really trying this, and then he spun around faster than a dog should be able to, and Charlie's entire muzzle up to and including his eyes was inside Keter's mouth.

I was CERTAIN Charlie was gonna die. But he just kind of wiggled his head out from Keter's mouth, Keter staring at him and making a really weird growl, and Charlie backed up while peeing on the floor.

It was such a cool display of domesticated animals adapting... I'll never forget it. They both made big choices, but Keter showing that restraint was just amazing to me. And they were playing together again soon after, so all was well.

And now I know even dumb-ass, dog-brained, too-horny-for-his-own-good Charlie was smarter than this dog-raping genital-less Florida man.