Hey, I’ve been looking at this site on and off for years since I was a young teen. For a lot of my life I thought I wanted to be a girl but then I realised I didn’t want to live as a woman. I admitted I wanted to be a nullo. Not sure where to go from here but it feels good understanding what I am at last I guess. And hello to this community!

Welcome to the forum. From what I've heard, Europe is not as helpful as the US when it comes to surgical transition, but I wish you the best of luck.

Thank you. Not sur what options I will have. Just want to be smooth.

Hey @Dionysus ,

Welcome and hello to you too. Read the forums, there is so much information there. Remember that the fiction archive is just fiction and for fun.

Most importantly, take it slowly. Learning what you want is as critical as realizing that it's nor reversible.

Welcome to the Eunuch Archive. I am also starting the process to transition from male to eunuch and then nullo. Make sure that you research everything and be certain that it is for you before getting and surgeries. This is a decision that can not be reversed once you go through with it and everything is removed.

Welcome to the club. I'm a nullo, and felt exactly like you do. Early on I thought it meant I wanted to be a woman. Then I realized I didn't want that, that I really like being male, I just didn't like the male parts between my legs. So I set out to do something about it. Found online resources in the late 1990's (I was about 25 at the time), got castrated in 2005, and finally in the middle of 2015, I had my penis and scrotum removed.

Best gift I ever gave myself.

Good luck with your journey, and if you have questions please feel free to get in touch. I'm happy to help you as you navigate this change in your body.

Welcome and a big congrats on being man enough to take a serious look at what you really want and admitting it to yourself openly.

Just take it real slow and careful. The biggest thing is figuring out if you want those changes for real, forever, and all that goes with them, or if you honestly want it to remain a hot fantasy turn on only ?

Most men just keep it a hot fantasy. Fewer men actually get cut. Both fantasy and serious about getting cut men are welcome and routinely enjoy using this site. You and lots of other boys and teens do manage to sneek on here underaged and can t realistically be kept off any internet site. Now that you are a grown man, its totally up to you to decide what you want and don t want.

Welcome !

Losethem (imported) wrote: Thu Aug 16, 2018 7:48 pm Welcome to the club. I'm a nullo, and felt exactly like you do. Early on I thought it meant I wanted to be a woman. Then I realized I didn't want that, that I really like being male, I just didn't like the male parts between my legs. So I set out to do something about it. Found online resources in the late 1990's (I was about 25 at the time), got castrated in 2005, and finally in the middle of 2015, I had my penis and scrotum removed.

Best gift I ever gave myself.

Good luck with your journey, and if you have questions please feel free to get in touch. I'm happy to help you as you navigate this change in your body.

Thank you. Realising all of this has been strange. I broke down crying drunk on my birthday heat telling my friend I thought I was trans. She said to really explore myself first. I realised being a girl wasn’t for me. I’d really like to know more about how you ended up where you are now.

Dionysus (imported) wrote: Fri Aug 17, 2018 8:15 am Thank you. Realising all of this has been strange. I broke down crying drunk on my birthday heat telling my friend I thought I was trans. She said to really explore myself first. I realised being a girl wasn’t for me. I’d really like to know more about how you ended up where you are now.

I never got to the point I broke down in front a friend crying regarding my feelings (and no dishonor in your doing so), I suffered through it mostly alone, taking the opposite route - a nearly insatiable desire to get it done, or string myself up from a tree if I couldn't. That sounds rather Debbie Downer, I know, but it was my reality.

I knew as young as 5 years old I wasn't meant to have male genitals on my body. I drew photos of stick people when I was really young and my teacher would throw them away, and I think she once thought my parents were up to no good raising me. They were nude stick figures, and they thought I was drawing a nude man and woman. What they didn't know is one was the boy I was (with penis and testicles), and the other was the boy I wanted to be (no genitals), standing next to the other. In my mind, I can still distinctly see the images I drew, and remember the embarrassment and fear from having the teacher take the drawings from me.

So get past that, all the torment I suffered in school because I'm different (not outwardly, but I feel kids have an uncanny ability to sense "otherness" in their peers, and torment accordingly), and finally into the 1990's when I started figuring out what was truly going to happen with myself and my body. The Internet arriving when it did was a Godsend to me. I found out I wasn't alone and there were other men out there like myself, wanting to change their bodies only doing castration or penectomy, on up to having their genitals completely amputated to become a nullo.

I've been online on this site pretty much from the beginning. People who have been here a very long time can remember me when I was an intact male (well, except my foreskin), and followed me through my castration through to my penectomy 10 years later.

So that's how I ended up where I am now. It was a long, difficult journey, and I'm glad folks like myself and Gelding have been there to make the path easier for those coming after us. You have choices now to achieve your goal that were not available as recently as 5 years ago.

If you have more you'd like to know, or specific questions, feel free to send them to me in a private message. It might take me a while to answer, but I will eventually.

A huge welcome here!