Ever since I was a teenager I had a fantasy about being castrated. But it was only a fantasy for many years. For at least 5 years now I have still had the castration fantasy but it has changed a little. I dream of having some of my younger very cute straight friends perform my castration. There are several that I would even to pass the fantasy barrier and actually do it. It would take some serious talking to allow them to do it. Or even better if I were to be forcibly castrated. I found some lumps on my testicles and went to the doctor who sent me to have and ultrasound test done. Armed with these reports I went to a urologist and he scared me by wanting to perform surgury the next day. I had to wait for one week due to my work schedual. I went under and when I woke I no longer had either testicle. I am unhappy to lose my testicles while their are so many that would have gladdly traded places with me. Has anyone else found themselves in this position?:(

Let me be the first to welome you to the Archive message board. I give you my simpathy for your recent surgery. You will find many people here that care about each other. I hope you find some of the answers you are looking for. Each of us are different in our own way and we share a common situation, be it willing or unwilling, chemical or physical, transexual, gay, straight, or bisexual, castration is the end result. You should not feel like you are alone. This place is more than just a message board, you will find that it is a place you can come to and feel welcomed and be amongst friends.

I've had infections in my testicles twice.

The infections, left untreated, could have destroyed them. However, both times my testicles hurt a lot, so both times I went and saw a doctor immediately, and they prescribed antibiotics which fought off the infections.

So how's your eunuch life like?

Knightfire (imported) wrote: Sun Oct 06, 2002 8:08 pm I found some lumps on my testicles and went to the doctor who sent me to have and ultrasound test done. Armed with these reports I went to a urologist and he scared me by wanting to perform surgury the next day. I had to wait for one week due to my work schedual. I went under and when I woke I no longer had either testicle. I am unhappy to lose my testicles while their are so many that would have gladdly traded places with me. Has anyone else found themselves in this position?

Although you didn't actually say so, you sound as if you had testicular cancer. As such, there is no reason why you cannot take replacement testosterone, is there? Have you talked to your doctor or urologist or endocrinologist about replacement testosterone?

In any case, you are welcome here. Your case is unfortunate, but there are some resources out on the web for testicular cancer survivors, and any search engine should turn them up.

Illness of any kind is unfortunate, and it's even more terrible when something so ironic as this - removal of the testicles - happens to someone that doesn't really want it.

A fantasy can be a very powerful thing, but Reality sometimes just doesn't measure up when it hits you right in the face.

I can't begin to imagine how you must feel, Kf, but you're more than welcome here and I think you'll find plenty of friends and useful information to ease the shock some.

A belated, 'welcome to the zoo'.

I hope you're recovering well. Take care of yourself, and don't overdo it.

If you ever need to ask, vent, whatever, don't hesitate to do it. That's what we're here for - support.

I can appreciate what you're going through as it is not that different from what happened to me. My cock was mutilated and most of it removed after massive post operative infection set in. That was 13 years ago.

You have to come to terms, learn first to accept what has happend, and then to celbrate what has happened. Unless you are happy with yourself nobody can ever be happy with you.

Whether by choice or by circumstance, many of us find ourselves minus a part or two. But you can't dwell on the life you left behind.

It will take time. I know I struggled for several years. But time does heal. By reading this website you will find yourself in good company. There are a number of eunuchs who regularly post here and share ideas. Even if, like me, you rarely post but only read their posts, you'll find a lot of comfort.times

I did not mention what the doctors suspected, and that was testicular cancer. The proceedure for the removal under those conditions is through the inguinal canals. They will not chance the cancer if there is any to get into the blood stream so the cords are clamped high and the testicles cut off. The biopsy is performed by the pathologist later. I had no choice but to go along with the recommendations. I will have HRT's as soon as the doctors discuss with me what kind to take. I hate shots! I am getting better everyday however everything is still a nice shade of purple and very swollen. I have to wear a truss to prevent a hernia. This is because where they cut is the same place an intestinal herna can develope through the inguinal canal. Thanks for all of the kind comments and letters of support. With this help I will make it through.

Knightfire (imported) wrote: Mon Oct 07, 2002 7:08 pm I did not mention what the doctors suspected, and that was testicular cancer.

OK, I did a quick search with Google, and came across the TCRC: Testicular Cancer Resource Center. Seems to be what you need as a support group.

http://tcrc.acor.org/



I did a quick search of the site, and they seem to have many people on Testosterone replacement therapy, and I'm sure they will be willing to help you out. In addition to shots, there seems to be some testosterone patches you wear on your skin. Hope this helps.

Knight my friend, I am glad to see you posting on the message board, funny as it may sound it helps to get it out and put it down on paper er board. I know we have talked and talked about this and everything. You have my home phone and if you ever need to call me collect. I will always be here for you.

Tom

I really do appreciate all the kind letters of support that are posted. I am doing well with the change. I have constant headaches and mood swings now. I am having a hard time coping with it at times. I am growing tired of the blood tests to determine the hormone levels so they can be adjusted. I just hope it happens before my sex drive goes away. My latest test showed a testosterone level of 150 out a normal range 212 to 742 shows that I am closer. My boss has nicknamed my "bitch" because of my attitude at the Dealership service department. I am prone to snap at someone and then feel terrible about it in 5 minutes. I am sure all of you have gone through this but it is new to me. Thanks again for all the kind support from the people who are in the chat room and those that have posted a reply to my cry for help. I am getting better. As far as the surgury went, I am still without sensation on either side of my sack and on my groin below the incisions. I hope that will return. The doctor told me on the follow up visit that he took biopsys of my scrotum and he gave some medical term to me. In short he suggests now that I have my sack removed. Lord help me get through this.