Hello all! I have been a lurker here for going on 10 years, & have posted a few times under various throw away accounts. Anyway, im a 26 year old Gay male, whom has recently "come out" as Gender Queer. I do not identify as transgender, as i have no interest in transitioning into a woman. If anything, i wish to be "less" male. Since puberty, i can remember having feelings of dysphoria when it came to my genitals. I have always very much disliked erections, & have done things that could be considered "self harm" to my member to try & prevent them. I cant say that i hate my testes, but in the past associated them with the root of my problems. For a while i thought i wanted to be a eunuch, but after some soul searching have decided that is not the answer. I do not personally wish to be gender / sex less, & i do want children. Having them removed just to go on hormone therapy wouldn't "solve" my problem. I have been sexually active since i was 16 & wish to continue to be, atleast until im older. In bed im very passive / submissive. While i have tried being the "top" in a few relationships, it never felt right & those relationships didn't last long. I would get a wave of feelings while i was doing it that i can only describe as dysphoria. That would lead to "poor performance" on my part. However taking the bottom role has always suited me fine. I have very much suppressed all of these feelings for most of my life, but after my last relationship ended late July i decided its time i explore this side of me. I decided to stop jerking off, & only masturbate via anal & nipple stimulation. Once i got past the first week of what can only be described as "raging hard ons", i settled into this new way of doing things just fine. I actually find it more satisfying, although it does take close to 20 mins, as apposed to 5. Anyway, back to the point. So after many years of wanting to try Androcur, i recently decided to pull the trigger & order it from inhouse pharmacy. I have extensively read the posts on this forum, & feel that an Antiandrogen would be right for me as opposed to a hormone. Again being "sex less" is not my ultimate goal, but i know it would knock out my erections for a while, & possibly shrink it if i continued not to used "it". Now i am not doing this under the supervision of a doctor, which i know is not advisable, but i feel that i have done the necessary research to do a safe trial on my own. I promised my self that if i had any adverse affects outside of the usual side effects i will go straight to my doctor & lessen my dose immediately (i know i cant quit cold turkey). I will not be consuming alcohol at all to hopefully lessen the effects on my liver, & if i maintain my existing cardio routine combined with a stricter diet i should be able to minimize the weight gain. I am kind of excited to see if my chest gets any bigger, not because i want brests, but would like to have bigger / more sensitive nipples. I have always been a little over weight, so im use to having small "moobs", so as long as they dont become huge i think ill be alright. Worst case, ill go to the doctor who will diagnose me with Gynecomastia & hopefully my insurance will pay for removal. I will be ending the trial before the 6 month mark because i do not want to affect my fertility. My initial order consisted for 100 50MG pills because i figured if i dont like it, i dont want to be stuck with extra. I will order more soon should i continue. All of that being said, i am now on day 3 of my trial & have been keeping a journal of my pill intake along with daily weight & pictures every few days. I am doing 50mg twice a day, & will only up the dose if i feel its not working. 100mg a day seems to be the recommended dose, & i would like to stay consistent as to not cause any problems. The 2nd to last week ill be cutting down to 50mg a day, & the last week 25mg a day & have already set those pills aside so they are not used. I dont expect to fell / see any changes for atleast a week, but i have to say my chest has been consistently warmer than the rest of my body since i woke up today. I doubt the two are related, but who knows right? Well thank you for reading my rant. Im less looking for advise because i feel informed enough to be doing this on my own, but am very open to any input or personal experiences you all wish to share with me. Thank you for reading.

Hello, yes, test it ... there is no real risk if you try it not too long time.

The most important thing is, be patient, mostly it needs 10 days if you feel any change.

Before you only have reactions on the drug itself, but testosterone will decrease not so fast.

Yes, 50 or 100mg should be really enough! It is a very powerful drug but it needs time.

First of all - welcome to the Zoo .

And I second the point that 50mg/day (split in two doses) should be enough.