Where do i begin?
Posted: Fri Jan 30, 2015 2:07 pm
Since reaching puberty, i have had the desire [more of a desperate need, really] to rid myself of my ugly, hated testicles and, yes, my equally detested penis. While i did not know the terms "castration" or "eunuch" yet, i had often contemplated slicing off everything down there myself, or having some horrible "accident" that would make it impossible for the medical professionals to save my what was hanging uselessly between my legs. But i never found the courage to do either. Besides hating the unsightliness of my genitals, i was constantly beset by the need to masturbate, which i also hated, in order to stop thinking about sex for what seemed like every waking moment of my life. That need is with me to this day and i still despise it. As a homosexual i do have sex with men that i truly do enjoy. It is sex where i prefer not to be reciprocated. And, when there is reciprocation, i end up hating myself for enjoying those brief moments of enjoyment. Simply put, i want none of my happiness to be tied to my testicles and my penis.
Moving forward fifty some odd years, i am still contemplating castration as means to finally finding peace and happiness and contentment in my life. Seven-years-ago, my prostate was surgically removed due to cancer. At the time, i had hoped that my sexual thoughts and the drive that went along with those thoughts would lessen, or even cease altogether, once the prostate was gone. But that was not to be. My neediness to pleasure myself has increased drastically, along with my shame, for some odd reason. Two years ago, i made the decision to finally do something about my situation. I have chatted with a couple of eunuchs on a gay site, but they could or would not give me too much information as to how i should go about started the process. They both referred me to the Eunuch Archive, however. And both of them did send photos of their testicle-less [and one without a penis] selves. They looked wonderful to me. Both of them also claimed to be much, much happier and contented since going through their procedures. That is about all they would say, though. So, i am seeking advice, from anyone here who has gone through it, on how to proceed. Where should i begin? Thank you for your help.
Moving forward fifty some odd years, i am still contemplating castration as means to finally finding peace and happiness and contentment in my life. Seven-years-ago, my prostate was surgically removed due to cancer. At the time, i had hoped that my sexual thoughts and the drive that went along with those thoughts would lessen, or even cease altogether, once the prostate was gone. But that was not to be. My neediness to pleasure myself has increased drastically, along with my shame, for some odd reason. Two years ago, i made the decision to finally do something about my situation. I have chatted with a couple of eunuchs on a gay site, but they could or would not give me too much information as to how i should go about started the process. They both referred me to the Eunuch Archive, however. And both of them did send photos of their testicle-less [and one without a penis] selves. They looked wonderful to me. Both of them also claimed to be much, much happier and contented since going through their procedures. That is about all they would say, though. So, i am seeking advice, from anyone here who has gone through it, on how to proceed. Where should i begin? Thank you for your help.