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feeling frustrated

Posted: Thu Nov 06, 2014 1:40 am
by oscarjackson (imported)
Hi,

So I just cant explain how i feel atm, frustrated, devastated, lost, well, that doesn't even come close!! 10 years ago, when i was 18, i started trying to workout why i feel like i do..... I know im gay, but am i trans??? well, no... and it has taken a long time! So about five years ago, i finally realised what i need to be me.. But how do i get there???

I researched as much as i could, and then i found the eunuch archive!! And it was the first time i felt normal, so thanks to every one here.

After talking to doctors, therapist, several emails overseas to dr A, and a few gender clinics with no response, i decided it was time to take things into my own hands. As much as i only wanted to do this the safe way i stared calcium choride injections about 6 months ago after reading every post on the ea.... After starting to think that this wasn't working, i went off to the doc and complained about a lump, even tho i didn't, scans come back showing quite a large mass in each testical. Here i was, thinking yes!!! it will finally happen for me!! Well, i had my first uro appointment 8 weeks ago, and my 2nd 4 days ago.. and the answer i got was "I dont know what has caused this, but no action is required, at your age(28) we dont want to do anything drastic"

So what now?? what do i do??

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Thu Nov 06, 2014 4:13 pm
by Energizer (imported)
You can try a different doctor for one thing.

Second, if you are determined this is what you want and have tried all other avenues for a solution to be yourself, then you might continue with another injection and report back to either the same doctor, or perhaps a better choice would be a different doctor. If you have a mass on each one, there is obviously something wrong and I think most doctors would suggest removal. I am not recommending this, however.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Thu Nov 06, 2014 5:37 pm
by Paolo
If you've got lumps, get a 2nd and even 3rd opinion! Soon!

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2014 1:02 am
by oscarjackson (imported)
My urologist is on the hospital board, and took all my details to a meeting, and he said that everyone was not able to work out what was going on as my blood tests are normal. So i dont really have any 2nd/3rd opinions available in my area as i live in a small city and he has already talked to the other urologist that i would be able to go too.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2014 4:26 pm
by Energizer (imported)
Can you travel to a different city? A larger city where more choices are available would probably be preferred.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2014 8:00 pm
by daifu-orchid (imported)
I guess the doctors would be most careful not to miss cutting out a cancer, and also careful to do no harm. I don't know how often cancer starts in both testicles at the same time, but I would think not so often. Maybe the smalltown docs are playing the odds so as to do no harm. Maybe a different result in a big city?

Still, it would seem odd for both to go bad at the same time? Anyone an expert?

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2014 8:47 pm
by kristoff
daifu-orchid (imported) wrote: Fri Nov 07, 2014 8:00 pm I guess the doctors would be most careful not to miss cutting out a cancer, and also careful to do no harm. I don't know how often cancer starts in both testicles at the same time, but I would think not so often. Maybe the smalltown docs are playing the odds so as to do no harm. Maybe a different result in a big city?

Still, it would seem odd for both to go bad at the same time? Anyone an expert?

A friend of mine experienced testicular cancer bilaterally. It is a bit unusual, but does happen with some frequency. We had a party to celebrate his new, prosthetic balls.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Sun Nov 09, 2014 4:06 pm
by YodaNell (imported)
I agree with energizer. Do some more damage. At some point they'll have to be removed.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Mon Nov 10, 2014 7:33 pm
by oscarjackson (imported)
i have another urologist appointment in january with more scans to see if anything is changing.... so i do plan on doing some more injections (not ideal) i want some change but i dont want so much change that it looks like i may have caused it?? also today im going to my GP to ask for a testorone test, hoping if i have low T i may be able to use that as extra reason to remove.

Re: feeling frustrated

Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2014 2:07 am
by oscarjackson (imported)
Today I finally was able to get back to my gp and get my results on my testosterone test... It's now confirmed that I do have low t