i'm not a man who wants to be castrated. i'm a eunuch who craves liberation! why can't castration be more easily available in the u.k.? other people modify their own bodies the way they see fit, why must i live with a part of me that i know in my heart doesn't belong,

More than likely you already know the answer to your question. EVERYONE ELSE knows what is good for us. THEY know how WE should, and should not live.

Governments, clergy, the religious, politicians, doctors, ...............you name it. THEY have the power. Not necessarily wisdom or knowledge. But power.

When you know without a doubt what you need, as long as you are not harming others or imposing yourself upon them, sometimes you just have to take things into your own hands and ............. well, do what you gotta do........... safely. I did. Others have. Such is life in this so called free and civilized world we live in.

Lets look at some priorities surrounding wants, desire and accommodation. We all know how many people "want" something be it castration or an enhance breast or bigger, meatier balls or a 34 inch waist...and in all those cases, given some surgial ledgerdemain, they're possible. Now lets look at another want, one of mine. I have terminal Multiple Sclerosis and I want not to have it just as persons with Parkinson's, ALS, Cancer and so on down the medical trail don't want to have what they've got but there's no escape, no day after pill. I can, indeed I do, work for a cure not only for my problem but for ancillary medical problems in my real life job as a physicist. yes, I know it's tedious; particle theory is never, ever diverting dinner conversation but beyond my own desire to rid myself of something, I have an insatiable curiosity to find out what is on both sides. If I have to have this, then I must become my own subject for study. I must try every protocol, however crackpot I may find them, to see if there is some virtue or if in it, I can find something that might be extracted and used in another way. I cannot fairly and honestly ask anyone to participate in this self study save myself; After all, although I might hope if I can find anything, it might help others, it's a selfish, me first, that it will initially help.

I no longer can even understand what "wanting to be better" might be like if that were to happen. Less pain certainly, more mobility, less time each day involved in getting in and out, up and down, not having seizures, trying to lead what is my version of a normal life. "Want" is a funny thing; I was speaking with a dear friend who is at the onset of ALS and he says he wonders what it will be like to be dead inside a living entity. That's his "want" and he'll get it. Would it be wrong of me to spare him that "want"? People who are terminally ill, in some cases, "want" to be dead and in very modest ways that's becomming a possibilty.

I have no difficulties with those who wish for castration and find it difficult to achieve. Freud said we do not appreciate something unless we have paid for it but I wonder....I can appreciate the gravity of my situation and but I didn't pay for it. Would someone who paid for their castration appreciate it or simply find that it satisfies their needs? I have no doubt about the validity of someone wishing to be castrated; If I did, I wouldn't have had the procedure myself. What upsets me is that too many seem to want this on a spur of the moment occasion even if that moment seems, to them, to have been a long time. I say with nothing to back me but....I suspect that those of us who logically, pensively, extensively considered castration and then had it done do appreciate it if only because we understand the biological, pyschological effect it has on us.

But just to "want" something, even to "want" something badly isn't quite enough. For something as major as having one's testicles removed, I think it's best if we deeply understand why that's something we want. Although those of us here are well satisfied, completely accepting of our circumstances, I cannot abandon the thought that there are many men out there who once "wanted" castration and got it. And now "want" to not have done it. On my body is tattooed, "Only In Death Is Love Eternal". I think that applies to things we want as well. Only in death are our wants eternally satisfied.