Testicle-Squeezing Death
Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 7:17 am
I doubt he actually died from the testicle squeezing itself, as it seems he was already in an argument and a fight with three people, but it seems that he did die in the midst of a testicle squeeze.
http://hypervocal.com/news/2012/china-t ... lls-death/
This Chinese Testicle-Squeezing Death Is Going to Inspire Some Lovely Puns
POSTED APRIL 24, 2012 5:18PM BY HVNEWS
TAGS: BALLS OF STEEL, BALLSY, CHINA, DEATH, DEATH RISKS, OUCH
Love It Hate It Meh Craisins
A shop owner in China began an argument with a woman over her parking a scooter outside his shop. The dispute escalated, got violent and, bizarrely, ended when the woman took hold of the mans testicles and squeezed. She kept squeezing. Then he died.
This is not an exaggeration.
The two parties soon fell into a quarrel, and then the physical confrontation. The furious woman called up her husband and brother to come help her, which resulted in a more violent fist fight.
During the fight, the middle aged woman manged to grab the mans testicles, and squeezed them till he finally collapsed on the ground.
The man was immediately rushed to hospital, but unfortunately died there despite of efforts.
OK, there are worse ways to die. Getting sliced vertically into thin layers, starting with the nose (this is a big fear of mine). Doing a backflip into a shallow pool (although that might not hurt after a while). Playing chicken on the Brooklyn subway tracks. Choking on your dentures during sex. Drinking 10 liters of Coke every day. Absorbing the sins of all humanity.
Considering the circle of hell you enter when something as benign as a misplaced underwear seam even slightly compresses a teste, death-grab-level pain is tough to imagine. Lets just leave it be. Instead, well focus on the amateur Twitter comedians who might be struggling to find a hilarious angle on this. This, after all, is the true tragedy.
The testicle-pun smackdown will be held at Headlines That Suck. Nows your chance to weigh in! Come on, give us your best shot. (We can take it. Were wearing cups.)
http://hypervocal.com/news/2012/china-t ... lls-death/
This Chinese Testicle-Squeezing Death Is Going to Inspire Some Lovely Puns
POSTED APRIL 24, 2012 5:18PM BY HVNEWS
TAGS: BALLS OF STEEL, BALLSY, CHINA, DEATH, DEATH RISKS, OUCH
Love It Hate It Meh Craisins
A shop owner in China began an argument with a woman over her parking a scooter outside his shop. The dispute escalated, got violent and, bizarrely, ended when the woman took hold of the mans testicles and squeezed. She kept squeezing. Then he died.
This is not an exaggeration.
The two parties soon fell into a quarrel, and then the physical confrontation. The furious woman called up her husband and brother to come help her, which resulted in a more violent fist fight.
During the fight, the middle aged woman manged to grab the mans testicles, and squeezed them till he finally collapsed on the ground.
The man was immediately rushed to hospital, but unfortunately died there despite of efforts.
OK, there are worse ways to die. Getting sliced vertically into thin layers, starting with the nose (this is a big fear of mine). Doing a backflip into a shallow pool (although that might not hurt after a while). Playing chicken on the Brooklyn subway tracks. Choking on your dentures during sex. Drinking 10 liters of Coke every day. Absorbing the sins of all humanity.
Considering the circle of hell you enter when something as benign as a misplaced underwear seam even slightly compresses a teste, death-grab-level pain is tough to imagine. Lets just leave it be. Instead, well focus on the amateur Twitter comedians who might be struggling to find a hilarious angle on this. This, after all, is the true tragedy.
The testicle-pun smackdown will be held at Headlines That Suck. Nows your chance to weigh in! Come on, give us your best shot. (We can take it. Were wearing cups.)