A long time in the works.
Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2011 9:34 am
This is my true castration experience. Some of it has been posted in another portion of this forum, please forgive this as I did want to put it all in one place to make it easier to read. it was requested by an OP of this site.
A long time in the works.
For over ten years now Ive wanted to have my testicles removed for no reason other than Ive wanted them gone. Now most people would call me crazy or off my rocker. I tried several methods over the years to have them removed including a failed attempt with a small burdizzo, the first time with it was so painful I could not close the jaws on my own, I did try to have a friend do it and he said he could not do it for me. I then purchased some xylocaine online to numb the testicles, which allowed me to close the jaws on my own, I thought I had success however the human testicles are very resilient and they survived.
A year or so later I was in contact with a Cutter to try to have him remove them for me. I flew up to Oregon to see him, however when I got to meet him, he was very overweight, smoked 3 packs of cigarettes a day, and was just a disgusting person.
I did go to the edge with this person and backed out at the last minute. Just feeling it was not right to do it in a hotel room.
Fast-forward a few years I purchased online Androcur and used it for about 5 months and while most of the effects of I did like, but not the depression, and weight gain. I was forced off of the medication by the US customs service as at that time they were still stopping medications coming in from out of the country.
I then met up with a wonderful young man that became my Domestic partner for 3 years and was a eunuch before we met, it was a wonderful time however he felt that his sexuality was in question and decided to move on with his life and return to the life of a heterosexual man, while I was and sill decimated by this departure he feels he is better now.
Now move forward to about 9 months ago after reading the thread Ethyl Alcohol Teste Injection. I started to realize I could take my own destiny in to my hands and do castration in a way that would allow me to go to a Dr. and have them removed in a safe and sane manner. So I ordered a set of 22g 3cc syringes online and inject the 190 proof Everclear that I had purchased years back but never used. I started out with the right side injecting 1cc in every two weeks. I kept doing this for about 5 months and the right side had reduced in size by at least 50%.
My company finally put me on full time, which gave me health insurance. So I decided to start injecting the left side, and continue with the right.
Now we are to the current month. When I went in for a full physical I mentioned that my testicles didnt feel right, and the Dr. examined them and felt that one was a bit too firm, so he referred me to an ultra sound. I was very impressed by the female technician who treated me with the utmost respect and dignity, respecting my privacy.
She took about 6 pictures on each side and when she was done, exited the room telling me that she needed to have the pictures reviewed by a MD. When she returned to the room about 5 minutes later she stated that the Dr. wanted pictures of my kidneys, when she did that the blood flow was good and everything there looked good. When I got home from this I researched it to find that the testicles get a portion of their blood from the same supply that the kidneys do.
At the end of the exam she informed me that the pictures would be reviewed shortly and should the Dr. feel that there is a problem they would contact me first thing.
On that Monday I received a total of 3 phone calls from the Dr.s office they told me that they are worried about lumps that were discovered and that they want to rule out Cancer so they referred me to a Urologist when I called the urologic department to setup an appointment they had already received my file and wanted me to come down the same day. This was a shock for sure to get in so quickly I went down to the Dr. and he talked to me and the first words out of his mouth were, Are you married? Are you planning on having children? with those two questions I knew where he was going with this line of questioning, he gave me a few other bits of information with this and said the way this can be treated was to remove both testicles and informed me the method of the radical inguinal orchiectomy. But told me that if they are removed I will may have hot flashes, loss of muscle, breast development, weight gain and can also develop osteoporosis. But I told him that with my loss of the size of the testicles and the lumps I did research and found that that all can be stopped by HRT. He described how a biopsy is preformed by a frozen method however it will not give a full picture of the entire testicle, he also talked about a kidney biopsy that he took that showed negative and a week later he was removing it because it turned out it was cancerous. He then asked me if I had to make a decision right now what would I choose to do, I took a few second pause and said this is a hard decision, but I want them removed he made a few entries in my medical record on the computer, then told me that I would have a new blood test and he would be checking for cancer markers. After this I asked him if he felt I was crazy for choosing to have them removed. He said Not at all then the told me to call him on Monday to find out the results. When I left I went and had the blood work and went home.
On my way home from the Urologist I called my sister to discuss the problems with my testicles, she knows I'm gay and we can talk about anything. After I told her that they are going to be removed she said dont worry Mom and I will be there for you they are just things you will be fine I called my Mother as well I asked her not to Freak out as I told her the findings as well. I told them I will tell them the date as soon as I know.
Later that evening I checked my email to find that the blood test was negative for any cancer markers. The next day I received a call too late in the day for me to return to them, this morning I called them back and they told me that there were no cancer markers in my blood, I said that I knew this but the Dr. still wanted me to call him back on Monday, the Nurse then put me on hold for a few minutes, she came back and said. Did you make your decision? I told her that I wanted them removed. Now I'm just waiting for the call for my surgery date.
I received a call from the Dr. on a Saturday The Dr. went over my blood test results and was concerned about my Creatine Levels these are markers that show kidney function My levels started out at a 1.2 before I started any medications. My second blood test showed a level of 1.4, which is just above high normal. Now my tests showed up at a 1.7, this did raise a concern and he wanted this addressed before surgery.
The Dr. asked if I was on any blood thinners. I told him I was on a 81mg baby aspirin daily. He told me to stop that right away, and the said he will put in the surgery order but the soonest it could be will be the 5th of October. I called my sister to inform her of this, so she could plan the trip, as she needs at least 18 hours to drive from Colorado to California. This was a HUGE mistake as My Mother kept texting her and me for an exact date. It drove me insane that Monday and Tuesday until I got my date.
I called my GP to discuss this and he reduced my BP medication Lisinapril (sp)? From 3 tablets a day to just 1. I then started on increased intake of water, over 80 oz. of water a day, I cut out all the protein from animal products, also a few different kidney cleansing herbs, I got my level from the original 1.4 that rose to a 1.7 with the max normal being 1.2 down to a 1.3. so the Urologist was happy with the reduction.
I finally got the date of the 20th of October. For the surgery, with a pre-consultation of the 10th.
The 10th finally arrived.
The Dr went over the location of the incisions that he will be making on me. Telling me that normally he would be making larger incisions to remove more cord. But an ending result can be a permanent numbness on the tops of my legs. So he will make smaller incisions but not remove as much cord, he said if he needs to go back in later to remove more cord this may happen.
Once more he brought up that he would like to do a biopsy first, but did tell me that I could end up with more pain from that then the pain I am having now.
I asked him if I will be having stiches or be glued closed, he said, Stitches but may also have glue.
I asked him if there would be drain tubes, he said no tubes.
Then I asked a Morbid question, Is there any way I can see them after they are removed he said Not really, and you really dont want to see them anyway they will be taken to pathology for a cancer screening.
He then listened to my breathing and my heart and then a final drop your pants and examined the testicles and he felt the odd lumps on both sides. He then made more notes in the computer while I got dressed.
When we were done with all that he followed me to the nurses station and filled out a consent to operation form, administration of anesthetics and rendering of other medical services form. On this he put in the to preform the following operation or procedure area, Bilateral Inguinal Orchiectomy for the purpose of bilateral testis tumors.
The female assistant then asked me what procedure I was going to be having so that she could fill out the work status report for my employer, This explains that I need the time off of work, I told her with a straight face Orchiectomy and then said I do know how to pronounce that one I got a print out that states Post Surgery nothing more on it to give to my employer. But my copy says Testicular Mass
The next few days were pretty uneventful and felt like I was 8 years old waiting for Christmas to come, each day became slower than the one before. The Tuesday before surgery I took a ½ day off, as my family was here to help me with all the surgery.
My family showed up at my place about 1:30 on the 18th and they settled in. We went to dinner that night; I did have a glass of wine with dinner, even though the pre op information sheet said no alcohol 48-72 hours before. The next day we did some running around, shopping and such.
Mom and Sister made me dinner at home. Nothing too exciting for sure. I wanted a glass of wine but decided it was not a good idea, and I showered then went to bed at about 9:30, needless to say I didnt sleep all that well.
I woke up at 4:00, out the door by 4:20, a 50 or so mile drive to the surgery center, got there at 5:08, had to stand outside until 5:30 on the dot when the door opened, went up to the 2nd floor to check in, Name, Insurance card, a few questions paid my Copayment was given my arm band then sat down for about 30 min or so, I was then called in My sister asked if she could go back with me but the nurse said she would be allowed back in about 20 min or so. I was then escorted to my prep area. The nurse gave me a wonderful paper hospital gown, and left me to change in privacy after taking my BP. it was a bit elevated, gee I wonder why? I had to sign another release for the surgery when the nurse came back she hooked up a warm air tube to my hospital gown to keep me warm. She also gave me two-500mg Tylenol. And placed a nausea patch behind my left ear, She then inserted my IV and taped it to my hand. My sister came back for a few minutes to comfort me, and then left to let my Mother come back as well, while my mother was there. My Dr. came in to finalize the entre procedure and a nurse came in to witness that I was agreeing with everything. Inguinal Bilateral Orchiectomy with NO biopsy, I may have numbness in the tops of my legs. I may also have phantom pain, that will be permanent.
Then came the anesthesiologist, we went over all the things. Had I ever had surgery, heart problems, even though he had the ekg right in front of him. Asked if I ever had a stroke, and so on.
A small Pilipino nurse came in to shave me; She said my Mother could stay, but I opted to have some privacy and asked her to leave at this time. The nurse was not the most genital person, and I feel she shaved too much. But what can you do?
By this time it was 7:25, I was then rolled in to the OR, I had to shift myself on to the operating table, I looked at the OR clock and it read 7:32, the nurse in the OR asked me my name and took a scan of my bracelet I felt them put a strap over my lower legs, they moved my arms on to boards to keep them out-stretched, and thats about all I remember until 9:15, I was being pushed back to the Post Op area. I was in and out of sleep for about another 15-25 min. while another nurse was there with me. She had me drink some water and gave me some graham crackers and two Percocet tablets; the nurse went over all the post op instructions and restrictions with my sister and me.
She told me that the Dr. told her that they had to cut in to my scrotum to remove some adhesions, My sister then left while I was allowed to get dressed The post op nurse found a wheel chair for me I got in to this and had to wait for another hospital staff member to wheel me down to the pickup area outside. On the way out, I saw and thanked my Dr. for his work.
We then drove home, we were at my place by 12:00 or so I felt pretty good, had a bit of toast with my antibiotic and a Vicodin tablet to keep the pain away for a bit longer, I really didnt feel bad at all. Later I finally had to go to the bathroom and discovered the athletic supporter with a HUGE wad of cotton in it, I have two bandages one on either side of the upper inguinal area these have some tegaderm on them keeping the area sealed. I took that off the athletic supporter and went to pee and saw the empty scrotum and smiled, its DONE
We all had dinner that night, while I was not too hungry I did eat some thing to keep from getting an upset stomach due to the antibiotics that were prescribed. But I didnt stay up too late, come the next morning I was surprised how well I did feel. I got up and got dressed, my mother and I drove to town and lunch and I had to check my mail at the post office. I did have a bit of discomfort at first but it went away a bit later, when we got home I changed back to some comfortable things and slept off and on most of the day.
Come Saturday my sister and mother were so surprised by my recovery they decided they would leave a day early.
I went to Lunch on Monday with a friend of mine, before I went to meet him, I called the Dr.s office to inquire about the Tegaderm and how long I was to leave this on, I was told that I could remove it today. When I got home I removed the covering and found that I have two 1 ½ incisions being held closed by 3 Sperry strips, No stitches at all. So now Im just waiting for the glue to break down a bit so I can remove them with no pain.
It looks like I will have minimal scars from this and they will be covered by body hair once it grows back in, I'm also waiting for the two-dissolvable stitches in my scrotum to fall out.
A long time in the works.
For over ten years now Ive wanted to have my testicles removed for no reason other than Ive wanted them gone. Now most people would call me crazy or off my rocker. I tried several methods over the years to have them removed including a failed attempt with a small burdizzo, the first time with it was so painful I could not close the jaws on my own, I did try to have a friend do it and he said he could not do it for me. I then purchased some xylocaine online to numb the testicles, which allowed me to close the jaws on my own, I thought I had success however the human testicles are very resilient and they survived.
A year or so later I was in contact with a Cutter to try to have him remove them for me. I flew up to Oregon to see him, however when I got to meet him, he was very overweight, smoked 3 packs of cigarettes a day, and was just a disgusting person.
I did go to the edge with this person and backed out at the last minute. Just feeling it was not right to do it in a hotel room.
Fast-forward a few years I purchased online Androcur and used it for about 5 months and while most of the effects of I did like, but not the depression, and weight gain. I was forced off of the medication by the US customs service as at that time they were still stopping medications coming in from out of the country.
I then met up with a wonderful young man that became my Domestic partner for 3 years and was a eunuch before we met, it was a wonderful time however he felt that his sexuality was in question and decided to move on with his life and return to the life of a heterosexual man, while I was and sill decimated by this departure he feels he is better now.
Now move forward to about 9 months ago after reading the thread Ethyl Alcohol Teste Injection. I started to realize I could take my own destiny in to my hands and do castration in a way that would allow me to go to a Dr. and have them removed in a safe and sane manner. So I ordered a set of 22g 3cc syringes online and inject the 190 proof Everclear that I had purchased years back but never used. I started out with the right side injecting 1cc in every two weeks. I kept doing this for about 5 months and the right side had reduced in size by at least 50%.
My company finally put me on full time, which gave me health insurance. So I decided to start injecting the left side, and continue with the right.
Now we are to the current month. When I went in for a full physical I mentioned that my testicles didnt feel right, and the Dr. examined them and felt that one was a bit too firm, so he referred me to an ultra sound. I was very impressed by the female technician who treated me with the utmost respect and dignity, respecting my privacy.
She took about 6 pictures on each side and when she was done, exited the room telling me that she needed to have the pictures reviewed by a MD. When she returned to the room about 5 minutes later she stated that the Dr. wanted pictures of my kidneys, when she did that the blood flow was good and everything there looked good. When I got home from this I researched it to find that the testicles get a portion of their blood from the same supply that the kidneys do.
At the end of the exam she informed me that the pictures would be reviewed shortly and should the Dr. feel that there is a problem they would contact me first thing.
On that Monday I received a total of 3 phone calls from the Dr.s office they told me that they are worried about lumps that were discovered and that they want to rule out Cancer so they referred me to a Urologist when I called the urologic department to setup an appointment they had already received my file and wanted me to come down the same day. This was a shock for sure to get in so quickly I went down to the Dr. and he talked to me and the first words out of his mouth were, Are you married? Are you planning on having children? with those two questions I knew where he was going with this line of questioning, he gave me a few other bits of information with this and said the way this can be treated was to remove both testicles and informed me the method of the radical inguinal orchiectomy. But told me that if they are removed I will may have hot flashes, loss of muscle, breast development, weight gain and can also develop osteoporosis. But I told him that with my loss of the size of the testicles and the lumps I did research and found that that all can be stopped by HRT. He described how a biopsy is preformed by a frozen method however it will not give a full picture of the entire testicle, he also talked about a kidney biopsy that he took that showed negative and a week later he was removing it because it turned out it was cancerous. He then asked me if I had to make a decision right now what would I choose to do, I took a few second pause and said this is a hard decision, but I want them removed he made a few entries in my medical record on the computer, then told me that I would have a new blood test and he would be checking for cancer markers. After this I asked him if he felt I was crazy for choosing to have them removed. He said Not at all then the told me to call him on Monday to find out the results. When I left I went and had the blood work and went home.
On my way home from the Urologist I called my sister to discuss the problems with my testicles, she knows I'm gay and we can talk about anything. After I told her that they are going to be removed she said dont worry Mom and I will be there for you they are just things you will be fine I called my Mother as well I asked her not to Freak out as I told her the findings as well. I told them I will tell them the date as soon as I know.
Later that evening I checked my email to find that the blood test was negative for any cancer markers. The next day I received a call too late in the day for me to return to them, this morning I called them back and they told me that there were no cancer markers in my blood, I said that I knew this but the Dr. still wanted me to call him back on Monday, the Nurse then put me on hold for a few minutes, she came back and said. Did you make your decision? I told her that I wanted them removed. Now I'm just waiting for the call for my surgery date.
I received a call from the Dr. on a Saturday The Dr. went over my blood test results and was concerned about my Creatine Levels these are markers that show kidney function My levels started out at a 1.2 before I started any medications. My second blood test showed a level of 1.4, which is just above high normal. Now my tests showed up at a 1.7, this did raise a concern and he wanted this addressed before surgery.
The Dr. asked if I was on any blood thinners. I told him I was on a 81mg baby aspirin daily. He told me to stop that right away, and the said he will put in the surgery order but the soonest it could be will be the 5th of October. I called my sister to inform her of this, so she could plan the trip, as she needs at least 18 hours to drive from Colorado to California. This was a HUGE mistake as My Mother kept texting her and me for an exact date. It drove me insane that Monday and Tuesday until I got my date.
I called my GP to discuss this and he reduced my BP medication Lisinapril (sp)? From 3 tablets a day to just 1. I then started on increased intake of water, over 80 oz. of water a day, I cut out all the protein from animal products, also a few different kidney cleansing herbs, I got my level from the original 1.4 that rose to a 1.7 with the max normal being 1.2 down to a 1.3. so the Urologist was happy with the reduction.
I finally got the date of the 20th of October. For the surgery, with a pre-consultation of the 10th.
The 10th finally arrived.
The Dr went over the location of the incisions that he will be making on me. Telling me that normally he would be making larger incisions to remove more cord. But an ending result can be a permanent numbness on the tops of my legs. So he will make smaller incisions but not remove as much cord, he said if he needs to go back in later to remove more cord this may happen.
Once more he brought up that he would like to do a biopsy first, but did tell me that I could end up with more pain from that then the pain I am having now.
I asked him if I will be having stiches or be glued closed, he said, Stitches but may also have glue.
I asked him if there would be drain tubes, he said no tubes.
Then I asked a Morbid question, Is there any way I can see them after they are removed he said Not really, and you really dont want to see them anyway they will be taken to pathology for a cancer screening.
He then listened to my breathing and my heart and then a final drop your pants and examined the testicles and he felt the odd lumps on both sides. He then made more notes in the computer while I got dressed.
When we were done with all that he followed me to the nurses station and filled out a consent to operation form, administration of anesthetics and rendering of other medical services form. On this he put in the to preform the following operation or procedure area, Bilateral Inguinal Orchiectomy for the purpose of bilateral testis tumors.
The female assistant then asked me what procedure I was going to be having so that she could fill out the work status report for my employer, This explains that I need the time off of work, I told her with a straight face Orchiectomy and then said I do know how to pronounce that one I got a print out that states Post Surgery nothing more on it to give to my employer. But my copy says Testicular Mass
The next few days were pretty uneventful and felt like I was 8 years old waiting for Christmas to come, each day became slower than the one before. The Tuesday before surgery I took a ½ day off, as my family was here to help me with all the surgery.
My family showed up at my place about 1:30 on the 18th and they settled in. We went to dinner that night; I did have a glass of wine with dinner, even though the pre op information sheet said no alcohol 48-72 hours before. The next day we did some running around, shopping and such.
Mom and Sister made me dinner at home. Nothing too exciting for sure. I wanted a glass of wine but decided it was not a good idea, and I showered then went to bed at about 9:30, needless to say I didnt sleep all that well.
I woke up at 4:00, out the door by 4:20, a 50 or so mile drive to the surgery center, got there at 5:08, had to stand outside until 5:30 on the dot when the door opened, went up to the 2nd floor to check in, Name, Insurance card, a few questions paid my Copayment was given my arm band then sat down for about 30 min or so, I was then called in My sister asked if she could go back with me but the nurse said she would be allowed back in about 20 min or so. I was then escorted to my prep area. The nurse gave me a wonderful paper hospital gown, and left me to change in privacy after taking my BP. it was a bit elevated, gee I wonder why? I had to sign another release for the surgery when the nurse came back she hooked up a warm air tube to my hospital gown to keep me warm. She also gave me two-500mg Tylenol. And placed a nausea patch behind my left ear, She then inserted my IV and taped it to my hand. My sister came back for a few minutes to comfort me, and then left to let my Mother come back as well, while my mother was there. My Dr. came in to finalize the entre procedure and a nurse came in to witness that I was agreeing with everything. Inguinal Bilateral Orchiectomy with NO biopsy, I may have numbness in the tops of my legs. I may also have phantom pain, that will be permanent.
Then came the anesthesiologist, we went over all the things. Had I ever had surgery, heart problems, even though he had the ekg right in front of him. Asked if I ever had a stroke, and so on.
A small Pilipino nurse came in to shave me; She said my Mother could stay, but I opted to have some privacy and asked her to leave at this time. The nurse was not the most genital person, and I feel she shaved too much. But what can you do?
By this time it was 7:25, I was then rolled in to the OR, I had to shift myself on to the operating table, I looked at the OR clock and it read 7:32, the nurse in the OR asked me my name and took a scan of my bracelet I felt them put a strap over my lower legs, they moved my arms on to boards to keep them out-stretched, and thats about all I remember until 9:15, I was being pushed back to the Post Op area. I was in and out of sleep for about another 15-25 min. while another nurse was there with me. She had me drink some water and gave me some graham crackers and two Percocet tablets; the nurse went over all the post op instructions and restrictions with my sister and me.
She told me that the Dr. told her that they had to cut in to my scrotum to remove some adhesions, My sister then left while I was allowed to get dressed The post op nurse found a wheel chair for me I got in to this and had to wait for another hospital staff member to wheel me down to the pickup area outside. On the way out, I saw and thanked my Dr. for his work.
We then drove home, we were at my place by 12:00 or so I felt pretty good, had a bit of toast with my antibiotic and a Vicodin tablet to keep the pain away for a bit longer, I really didnt feel bad at all. Later I finally had to go to the bathroom and discovered the athletic supporter with a HUGE wad of cotton in it, I have two bandages one on either side of the upper inguinal area these have some tegaderm on them keeping the area sealed. I took that off the athletic supporter and went to pee and saw the empty scrotum and smiled, its DONE
We all had dinner that night, while I was not too hungry I did eat some thing to keep from getting an upset stomach due to the antibiotics that were prescribed. But I didnt stay up too late, come the next morning I was surprised how well I did feel. I got up and got dressed, my mother and I drove to town and lunch and I had to check my mail at the post office. I did have a bit of discomfort at first but it went away a bit later, when we got home I changed back to some comfortable things and slept off and on most of the day.
Come Saturday my sister and mother were so surprised by my recovery they decided they would leave a day early.
I went to Lunch on Monday with a friend of mine, before I went to meet him, I called the Dr.s office to inquire about the Tegaderm and how long I was to leave this on, I was told that I could remove it today. When I got home I removed the covering and found that I have two 1 ½ incisions being held closed by 3 Sperry strips, No stitches at all. So now Im just waiting for the glue to break down a bit so I can remove them with no pain.
It looks like I will have minimal scars from this and they will be covered by body hair once it grows back in, I'm also waiting for the two-dissolvable stitches in my scrotum to fall out.
