This is the first time that I have posted to this list.

I have been a eunuch for over a year now. I also am knew to the gay world, but have definitely developed a bi-/bottom mentality now that I am off of testosterone.

Recently I had a friendly getting-to-know-you exchange with a male, who seemed attracted to me because of my eunuch status. We met on the internet only. I was inspired by our exchange as he seemed to really like me. However I was depressed that he seemed to be more interested in my diminutive sex parts than me. [I was also, I admit, freaked by his stated interest in "genital mutiliation."]

This guy was otherwise very bright and it saddened me that our exchange ended. But I felt very much like the women who complain about men only interested in them because of their breasts.

This leads me to several questions for all of you out there who are interested in eunuchs: What is it about us that makes us so interesting to you? How do you think we (who are not taking supplemental testosterone) really think and feel that is different than the way men think and feel?

And for the gay eunuchs out there, have any of your found partners who like you, and are gentle with you, and who are NOT into BDSM type stuff?

How many of you think your brains work differently--in contexts OTHER than sexual--now that you are off testosterone? How would you describe those difference?

...since you did ask....

tadpole (imported) wrote: Mon Jun 17, 2002 4:57 pm How many of you think your brains work differently--in contexts OTHER than sexual--now that you are off testosterone? How would you describe those difference?

I would say my brain is working differently because I have greatly reduced levels of testosterone-induced aggression or stress. This state of mind is often referred to as "the eunuch calm".

tadpole (imported) wrote: Mon Jun 17, 2002 4:57 pm This leads me to several questions for all of you out there who are interested in eunuchs: What is it about us that makes us so interesting to you? How do you think we (who are not taking supplemental testosterone) really think and feel that is different than the way men think and feel?

And for the gay eunuchs out there, have any of your found partners who like you, and are gentle with you, and who are NOT into BDSM type stuff?

I am not transgendered, and am very comfortable with my own masculinity -- except for its sexual aspects -- and am reluctant to give it up. While members of the transgendered community often remark they are a woman in a man's body, I fell a more apt discription of myself is that I'm an asexual person in a homosexual body.

My interest in other eunuchs stems mainly from deep respect for the bravery of their decision. Anyone willing to let go of their sexuality demonstrates the ability to see outside of culturally-imposed roles. I also find it appealing that someone would recognize the difference between sexual attraction and mental/spiritalual attraction and would be willing to forego the former. For that reason I seek a gelded boyfriend instead of a dom/master, and welcome the opportunity to base a relationship on something OTHER than sex. Sadly, I'm still looking for him.

one2dizzo (imported) wrote: Tue Jun 18, 2002 7:04 am My interest in other eunuchs stems mainly from deep respect for the bravery of their decision. Anyone willing to let go of their sexuality demonstrates the ability to see outside of culturally-imposed roles. I also find it appealing that someone would recognize the difference between sexual attraction and mental/spiritalual attraction and would be willing to forego the former. For that reason I seek a gelded boyfriend instead of a dom/master, and welcome the opportunity to base a relationship on something OTHER than sex. Sadly, I'm still looking for him.

Hmmmm, I'd have to think about that. Whilst I am not avoioding getting into a long term relationship with a human being of any sex, neither am I actively searching for such a relationship. Now that I am non-sexual, I suppose it would make no difference if that relationship was with a male. At the moment, though, my primary relationship is with my 15 year old castrated female cat, Pearly.

I suppose, logically, I have to concede the POSSIBILITY of a meaninful relationship with a female (transgendered or otherwise) or even a nullo'd guy -- if (suspended) sexuality was the only consideration. Being gay I want a "man" to be with ...just without all games that usually accompany gay men's silly, trivial quests for sexual gratification. Seems like two eunuchs would be able to achieve that in a relationship. Hence my response to Tadpole.

For myself, being a Eunuch is inclusive of the sexual desire to be so. I personally am looking for othe Gay men who have Chosen to be a Eunuch. For myself it is both a sexual status and an idenity that I desired. I do take hormones because I like having sex; after castration I really did not care to have sex with men who have testicles. The desire to be with another who is a Eunuch began before puberty.

Several times I have gone without taking homones and the experiences is good, OK, and GREAT! Body hair growth almost stops (beard also); although the effects of hormones lose varies with each individual. And my penis gets much shorter.

But personally I have no desire to be or become a female.

Anyway just some info to add to the conversation.

As a fairly recenty castrated gay man (proceedure done earlier this year), I may not have relevent experience. However, I too have had a couple of brief relationships with men who were more interested in my lack of balls than in me. As I have progressed from being fairly high on the agressive side of sexual things to being a very happy submissive, I have not been overly troubled by that behavior. Although I have no desire to be a sexual freak, I do understand other interest in what is mostly unknown or misunderstood.

Choosing life as a gay eunuch is not an easy choice. Living as a gay man in a small sourthern town was not all that easy either. I have no expectation that finding a long-term partner will suddenly be easy.

So if, in looking for that person, I encounter the curious, that is simply part of the life I have choosen. I may wish for it to be different--that gentle, understanding guys are just waiting to be with a eunuch--but that is not real. If you have the strength to make the decision to become a eunuch, you have already demonstrated the strenght to live in a world that is not overly accepting of differrence.