You let your 14 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

The Blue book value of your truck goes up or down depending on how much gas is in it.

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

Someone in your family died right after saying: "hey guys watch this."

Your wife's hairdo was ruined by a ceiling fan.

You're female and drive an older Camaro with a trailer hitch, gun rack and tobacco stains streaming back from the driver's window.

Get your hair done at Betty's Beer, Bait and Beauty Shop.

Just don't feel comfortable in a store with more than two bare 60 watt bulbs hanging from the ceiling.

Eat eggs for breakfast after seeing the chickens pecking dog shit in the yard.

Phole (imported) wrote: Sun Oct 19, 2008 7:08 am You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

And that's because they're the same aunt and uncle every time.

You've moved three times and you still live in the same house.

_smokey_ (imported) wrote: Mon Oct 20, 2008 6:43 pm You've moved three times and you still live in the same house.

...and that is because you never sold the axles to that stock car racer to make a car trailer and you stored the wheels under your house after you put it up on the concrete blocks...

Your pick-up truck is taller than your house.

You use a safety pin rather than chuck out your britches when the zipper go kerplunk.

Your tractor cost more than your cars (all 5 of them).

Your barn has more square footage than your house by a factor of 10.

Your neighbors are all related to you.

Your hometown is named Ink because when they voted on a name, the ballots had the instructions: "Write in ink."

Arab Nights (imported) wrote: Wed Nov 05, 2008 1:01 pm Your hometown is named Ink because when they voted on a name, the ballots had the instructions: "Write in ink."

You know, there is a story in Arizona.....

A town had popped up in the desert, and had been called one name or another but nobody could come to a concensus on just what the real name should be. Everyone wanted to name the town after themselves. Finally, they did come to an agreement, the first stranger that came into town that day would be given the honor of naming the town, it would have to be a stranger with NO affiliation to any of the residents, and whatever the first word from his mouth was, THAT was gonna be the permanent and official name.

Shortly after everyone agreed to that plan, along come the first stranger of the day.... Unfortunately, the stranger was a shade too dark for the local biggots in town, the local biggot just could not tollerate the idea that a black man would be given the honor of naming his town. So as soon as the unfortunate cowboy tied up his horse in front of the saloon.... The biggot just shot him, in cold blood, right in the chest.

The cowboy did manage to gasp out "YUMAAAaaa!"

Hey, I lived there for a couple of years. I highly recommend the place for the terminally ill. It will be the longest years of their life.