The Best of Late Night...

Gov. Palin gave a speech last night. She wanted to give people who don’t know her a chance to meet her. Like John McCain.

-Jay Leno

John McCain lasted 5 1/2 years in a POW camp in North Vietnam — even he couldn’t get through Joe Lieberman’s speech at the Republican Convention last night.

-David Letterman

Sarah Palin spoke at the Republican Convention last night. She says she’s opposed to same-sex marriage. Palin said, “Everyone knows marriage isn’t for gay people — it’s for pregnant teenagers.”

-Conan O'Brien

TV did great last night. The new version of “Beverly Hills 90210” premiered last night. It was a mix of the old has-beens of the old show, teamed with the sexy nobodys of the new show — kind if like TV’s version of the Republican ticket.

-Craig Ferguson

Dick Cheney did not attend the convention in Minnesota. Apparently, he had already scheduled a heart attack.

-David Letterman

We’re learning more and more from Gov. Palin . . . apparently her daughter’s name is Juno.

-Jay Leno

John McCain’s vice president choice, Sarah Palin, is an avid hunter. Let’s see — a vice president who likes guns . . . well, what could go wrong there?

-David Letterman

John McCain’s running mate, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, has revealed that her 17-year-old daughter is pregnant. The family said, “We should never have introduced her to John Edwards.”

-Conan O'Brien

There seems to be more coverage of Hurricane Gustav than the convention. Both very different, of course. One’s a stormy blast of wind that throws mud everywhere . . . the other’s Hurricane Gustav.

-Craig Ferguson

Bush appeared at the Republican Convention live via satellite. Which Bush calls live via magic.

-Conan O'Brien

Hmm, even better play on words. Juneau. Guess it was all written in the cards.

Charis (imported) wrote: Sat Sep 06, 2008 7:08 am We’re learning more and more from Gov. Palin . . . apparently her daughter’s name is Juno.

-Jay Leno