Page 1 of 2

Five Boys

Posted: Wed May 07, 2008 11:43 pm
by StefanIsMe (imported)
And here's another story that takes off on a classic series from E.A;

Five Boys ( http://www.eunuch.org/Alpha/F/ea_125857five_boy.htm ), by Coyan Hyde.

A well-written send-up of the C. van D. / Simon series. I'm not sure who did the very original neutersol posting, but I think C.V.D. expanded on it the most.

Well done, Coyan! 🙏

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Thu May 08, 2008 7:19 am
by Kangan (imported)
Excellent writing. BUT -- Where's the rest of the story?

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 4:46 am
by Paolo
Hell of a birthday party wasn't it?

;)

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Mon May 12, 2008 4:27 pm
by Unregistered (imported)
Excellent writing and storytelling. The irony at the ending was superb. Thank you, "Coyan Hyde" for a very well-told tale.

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Wed May 14, 2008 2:28 pm
by Coyan Hyde (imported)
Kangan (imported) wrote: Thu May 08, 2008 7:19 am Excellent writing. BUT -- Where's the rest of the story?

Thanks for everyone's encouraging comments.

Concerning Kangan's question, I don't understand what you're looking for.

My favorite part of "Simon Tells It Like It Was" (by C. van D.) was that Simon came so close to doing "the thing that makes a baby," but he was interrupted, and then he had his balls pricked. A similar thing happens to Eric (though he doesn't come as close to losing his virginity as Simon did).

I wanted to add a little twist to the story, so I had Emily end up being frustrated, too: She passes on Brian for Eric, only to find out that Eric can't; then, she passes on Rick and Sean for Brian, only to find out that Brian can't.

Were you waiting for Emily to eventually lose her virginity? Did you want Cole's parents to change their minds?

Maybe Cole should get Emily pregnant: That would give Cole's parents their desired grandchild, removing the obstacle to having his balls pricked. (But then, I'd have to change the title to "Six Boys.")

There's always the option of writing the "alternate, parallel universe" version of the story, so all constructive comments are welcomed.

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Wed May 14, 2008 3:47 pm
by JesusA (imported)
Kangan (imported) wrote: Thu May 08, 2008 7:19 am Excellent writing. BUT -- Where's the rest of the story?

My guess is that what Kangan means is, "Great story! How soon will be have a sequel???"

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 8:53 am
by Kangan (imported)
Coyan Hyde (imported) wrote: Wed May 14, 2008 2:28 pm Thanks for everyone's encouraging comments.

Concerning Kangan's question, I don't understand what you're looking for.

My favorite part of "Simon Tells It Like It Was" (by C. van D.) was that Simon came so close to doing "the thing that makes a baby," but he was interrupted, and then he had his balls pricked. A similar thing happens to Eric (though he doesn't come as close to losing his virginity as Simon did).

I wanted to add a little twist to the story, so I had Emily end up being frustrated, too: She passes on Brian for Eric, only to find out that Eric can't; then, she passes on Rick and Sean for Brian, only to find out that Brian can't.

Were you waiting for Emily to eventually lose her virginity? Did you want Cole's parents to change their minds?

Maybe Cole should get Emily pregnant: That would give Cole's parents their desired grandchild, removing the obstacle to having his balls pricked. (But then, I'd have to change the title to "Six Boys.")

There's always the option of writing the "alternate, parallel universe" version of the story, so all constructive comments are welcomed.

Your comments are noted -- I guess I did expect to read more about Emily, and I guess I was expecting all of the boys (is it 5 or 6? I lost count there somewhere...) to be castrated eventually....

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 8:56 am
by Kangan (imported)
JesusA (imported) wrote: Wed May 14, 2008 3:47 pm My guess is that what Kangan means is, "Great story! How soon will be have a sequel???"

That is more or less what I had in mind. I love stories about boys and girls losing their virginity and then all the rest....

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 5:09 pm
by Paolo
Yes, the poor dear at the end...all revved up and no place to go...or anyone to go with!

;)

Re: Five Boys

Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 7:51 pm
by kristoff
Good story. I like the ending.