Bud good to hear from you. I am sorry for the second loss of your mother. She is with your Pop and reunited with her memories.

If you need T for your health please do whatever is best for your health. My lack of T contributes to my mental health but I do not know the long term effects on my physical health. At this point in my life if my health required T I would take it.

If you move back to Houston it may be time for a Texas MoM. Actually I do not know if they have already had one. Would be great seeing you again.

Always good to read a new post from you.

BudleyBare,

You must have been castrated about the same time I started to do my chemical castration. I did it for over 2 1/2 years and now have been surgically castrated for over a year. During that time I have had numerous testosterone tests and have experienced how different levels effect me. Most of the time during my chemical stage my T level was right around 100 and I was generally happy with that. It wasn't at true castration levels but it made me pretty much impotent and not needing sex but left me with strength and the other effects were tolerable. My doctor said he would remove my testes if my T level stayed the same or was lower after a 3 month period. I probably could have just stayed on the same meds (he didn't know about them) but we added some Androcur and after 3 months my T level was down to castrate level- under 50. I didn't like things at this T level. I lost more strength and endurance, I got very dry and itchy skin, got more insensitive to temperature changes and some others. When the doctor agreed to castrate me, he also suggested TRT. From my experience, I was open to some but not enough to get into the normal range. I was most happy during the initial chemical castration phase so my thoughts were to duplicate that. My doctor was willing to let me experiment with the T dosage on 2 month segments. We used Testim gel and it has worked out that half a tube of it every other day or two is fine for me. It is hard to get a true reading of what my T level is because it is so dependant on when I have applied the gel. The gel does give me the ultimate in control of how much I use as my prescription is for 2 tubes a day which is at least 8 times what I am using. The gels are more expensive but my insurance covers all but a small co-pay which is further minimized because one refill lasts much longer now.

My thoughts on T is that everyone is different here, Some survive quite well with none and others need it back to a normal level. I think it is up to you to find out where you would really like to be. You seem happy with no additional T but haven't had any so there still is some question. Since the worst thing that can happen is that if you aren't happy taking any you can always stop, there doesn't seem to me, at least, to be a real downside in experimenting a bit. I do enjoy being in control of my testosterone now, not just my nuts pumping out however much they made.

Good luck.

Welcome back BudleyBare. Your story and sharing have always been a high point of this Archive (not to diminish others' contributions but you have been particularly optimistic and open and just generally inspiring).

The overall discussion on HRT is interesting. The sad fact is that there doesn't seem to be a perfect solution for those with eunuch orientation. For physical health you pretty much need a sex hormone, either testosterone or estrogen. But those of course sexualize you. The good news is that means energy, and muscle and bone strength. The bad news is that it means becoming slave again to sexual thoughts, aggressive thoughts, etc.

It's too bad there isn't a magic wand or pill that could truly just take away the bad parts of testosterone.

But as in all things in life, I'm confident there is a tolerable middle ground and you seem to have enough medical support to be able to properly find that point.

Good luck!

MacTheWolf (imported) wrote: Wed May 12, 2010 2:33 pm Welcome Home BudleyBear. Now you're just like Kristoff.

So, when do you get your red habit ?

What makes you think that I don't already have a red habit, as well as a Superman suit (less the bulge in the groin area) ?

...

SplitDik (imported) wrote: Fri May 14, 2010 10:43 pm Your story and sharing have always been a high point of this Archive (not to diminish others' contributions but you have been particularly optimistic and open and just generally inspiring)....

A very sincere thank you. At times I am anything but optimistic, but choose not to dwell on them nor write about them.

...

SplitDik (imported) wrote: Fri May 14, 2010 10:43 pm The overall discussion on HRT is interesting. The sad fact is that there doesn't seem to be a perfect solution for those with eunuch orientation. For physical health you pretty much need a sex hormone, either testosterone or estrogen. But those of course sexualize you. The good news is that means energy, and muscle and bone strength. The bad news is that it means becoming slave again to sexual thoughts, aggressive thoughts, etc. ...

How true, how true. I've just got to deal with the deck of cards that were dealt to me. And such is life.

The blessing in having found EA years ago is that I get to read both sides of the issue and then decide for myself. Thank you EA staff. You deserve all the praise you can get. Here's my praise for you!!!

Ciao for now,

BB

Just documenting that my HRT starts today. The prescription is for Androderm via trans-dermal patch, 5 mg/day.

Congrats on the Patch. I hope it works for you as my HRT program helps me. I wanted to comment on the "slave to sex" comment made in an earlier post. I don't know how to answer this as I'm sure there really are people who are "slaves" to their sex drive. That being they have all sorts of sex with people they are not dedicated to or continually "wank" and so on. What I want to say is that this is not my experience. And its not the experience (That I know of) of the people in my life. Sex can be a wonderful thing. A positive part of life. Just as a glass of wine at Thanksgiving can be a blessing whilst being a chronic drunk can be a nightmare. I think its partly self control and this maybe part of the whole question. That being that some can not "control" improper sexual behaviour and is (BTW) one reason for castration that I'm all for.

But that takes away the big picture which is that Testosterone is not just "sex" or "sex drive" its mood, mental focus, energy, mental health and more.

Thanks Mr. T. You write well and from a place of sensitivity and awareness. I understand and agree with your thoughts.

BB

Just documenting that there is very little, perhaps no improvement in my health status, given that I have been taking T now for just short of two weeks. It may be that I have little bit more energy, but event that is questionable. Hmmmmmm.....

has the itchy under arms gone away?

con grats and good luck on your journey