Just read #17. (Thankyou Admin!)

WOW! neat twist! Way to go author

BOOM! the witch is dead!

Didn't see THAT coming!

(Stefan can get your 'fix' now)

Quite a twist to the story. This enitre story is amazing writing. Evry chapter is interesting. Am still hoping that Benny, er, Landen, gets to lose his nuts.

Should have seen this coming when Bob was tinkering with the AC unit.

Just goes to show, don't get between this man and his boys. It's an odd twist - you hurt my boy, I'll kill you. Then again, this makes things not bode well for Scott at all - since he tried to blow the whistle on it all.

Paolo wrote: Sun Jan 24, 2010 9:11 pm Should have seen this coming when Bob was tinkering with the AC unit.

Just goes to show, don't get between this man and his boys. It's an odd twist - you hurt my boy, I'll kill you. Then again, this makes things not bode well for Scott at all - since he tried to blow the whistle on it all.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If he sees his shadow, do they fire up the Deathstar? thankyou:

You better be sure to stay hidden on that day!!

Thanks, A. Nonymous Poore, for letting us know that you have seen our feedback (and thanks Paolo for passing the email along for us).

Interesting -- and a relief! -- to know the story was only ever a teenaged boy's fantasy about falling in with boy-lovers (which gives it a rather different spin than if it were a grown man's fantasy about luring boys) and not a fictionalized account of molestation you, the author, or anyone you knew, was the victim of.

As for A-1, don't worry about that, as he was arguing with a straw man (http://www.fallacyfiles.org/strawman.html), not with you or with any of the people who had commented complimentarily about your story here. Of course we're all opposed to secret societies that abduct, brainwash, molest and/or surgically alter underage boys or anyone else.

Part 17 was certainly worth waiting for! I knew there was some plan the daddies had hatched and had been implementing, but I have to say the explosion still caught me by surprise. Nicely done.

I can't quite work out what "Landen" is an anagram of, though, especially with his original name being Benjamin... I don't remember it being his middle name, either, like Mr. Poore and his cop buddy were working Scott towards being called by.

Speaking of Scott: At the risk of unduly influencing the course of the remainder of the story (now that we know you're submitting as you write, rather than just rationing out an already-complete story) I have a feeling he'll be taking a trip somewhere warm and sandy in the near future. A certain someone who was apparently interested in Benny (well, Landen now) in part because he wasn't cut before puberty, perhaps... and who didn't enter the story until recently... and from whose home Scott wouldn't have a hope of running away back to his parents' neighborhood...

Also, I can't help but wonder whether the explosion was Poore & co.'s original plan for getting custody of Benny away from Lois Pence (still amused by Pence-Poore) or if they were "forced" to go to plan B-for-boom by Scott's having called her and her thus expecting to meet up with him on her return and thence go to the police together. If there was documentation that Poore was Ben's biological father (whether authentic or forged) and evidence that she had neglected (especially with the lack of nutritious food) or abused (the depo shots, which certainly appeared to have been administered by her to Ben, and which Dr. Kent had acquired proof of via Ben's bloodwork), then it oughtn't to have been difficult for his father to gain at least temporary custody of Ben. Preparing for this was what I had figured at least part of Daddy Poore's calls to his lawyer friend had been about. And that's without resorting to using the red-flicker-assisted hypnosis on Lois to get her to agree to give up custody -- unless for some reason that technique is less effective on adults than on kids?

There are enough loose ends remaining that I'm pretty sure there should be at least one more chapter. I'm torn; I want to keep on reading indefinitely about Ben/Landen's adventures, but I also want to find out what happens in the end, which does require that the story come to an end.

Will Ben/Landen(/Denny?) get re-circumcised? Glansectomized? Castrated? Will he go on testosterone and go to college? Will he eventually father or "find" a boy of his own? Will he start recruiting other boys while he's still a boy himself (a frequent tactic of pedophiles as it both provides a less-creepy-seeming initial contact with the target boy and also increases the first boy's feelings of not being able to tell without getting into trouble along with the adult[s])? Will he ever figure out that and how he was hypnotized as part of his indoctrination and how will he feel if he does? Will he ever turn in his father or the other boy-lovers, or himself? Will he and Scott ever see each other again if Scott winds up shipped off to a new Daddy far away?

I'm dying to know the answers to all these questions and more. I have no doubt you'll continue to surprise us with twists we never considered, too. Can't wait for part 18!

Why is it that readers assume the writer is in the story? That's not true.

Let me add more.

I have never written myself into a story. Whatever I write, whatever you read, I am not a character in my stories. More than that -- I did not do most things I write about and I may never do those acts.

It's unfair to load that onto an author, any author.

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am Thanks, A. Nonymous Poore, for letting us know that you have seen our feedback (and thanks Paolo for passing the email along for us).

You're welcome. I was kinda surprised at that.

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am Part 17 was certainly worth waiting for! I knew there was some plan the daddies had hatched and had been implementing, but I have to say the explosion still caught me by surprise. Nicely done. I can't quite work out what "Landen" is an anagram of, though, especially with his original name being Benjamin... I don't remember it being his middle name, either, like Mr. Poore and his cop buddy were working Scott towards being called by.

It was one of those plot twists that makes you sit there and say "oh wow!' Nice touch. Should have seen it coming when Bob and Bobbie were tinkering with the AC until and the gas line.

I used to do puzzle books when I was a kid. In Boy Scouts, we had a unit on writing code once.

Ronnie T. King was pretty much explained with how they got "Ti-rone" out of it then altered the spelling. Mr. Poore said in the last chapter "Benjamin Daniel Pence died tonight." Looking at it this way, you don't know what letters were dropped from Ronnie's middle name of "T."

Speaking of Scott:

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am I have a feeling he'll be taking a trip somewhere warm and sandy in the near future. A certain someone who was apparently interested in Benny (well, Landen now).

It does sort of look that way. I hope Scott isn't allergic to camels.

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am Also, I can't help but wonder whether the explosion was Poore & co.'s original plan for getting custody of Benny away from Lois Pence (still amused by Pence-Poore) or if they were "forced" to go to plan B-for-boom by Scott's having called her and her thus expecting to meet up with him on her return and thence go to the police together.

I think it had to be a plan B. They didn't count on Scott squealing. At least, that's how I read it. When Scott was sent home, it was clear that Mr. P. was attempting to bribe him off: recorded porn, movie night, a ride in the sports car, pretty much anything a boy that age would find cool.

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am If there was documentation that Poore was Ben's biological father (whether authentic or forged) and evidence that she had neglected (especially with the lack of nutritious food) or abused (the depo shots, which certainly appeared to have been administered by her to Ben, and which Dr. Kent had acquired proof of via Ben's bloodwork), then it oughtn't to have been difficult for his father to gain at least temporary custody of Ben. Preparing for this was what I had figured at least part of Daddy Poore's calls to his lawyer friend had been about. And that's without resorting to using the red-flicker-assisted hypnosis on Lois to get her to agree to give up custody -- unless for some reason that technique is less effective on adults than on kids?

I think the backstory on Martin & Lois going to college together is true. Even though Mrs. Smith is "200 years old", she's mistaken Ben/Landen for Canyon already, and even our hero wonders how much he looks like Canyon now that he has a haircut and their pictures are hanging up side by side. Fred the lawyer was also telling Mr. P. that they had enough to bury Lois already. I think he would have bought her off, and she'd have taken the $ - had Scott not blown it.

As for the way that our hero seems to "blip out" when he sees strobing lights now, I think the author's technique would only work on someone who'd been prepped for it - probably with drugs, too.

P.P.Herz (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 25, 2010 8:47 am Will Ben/Landen(/Denny?) get re-circumcised? Glansectomized? Castrated? Will he go on testosterone and go to college? Will he eventually father or "find" a boy of his own? Will he start recruiting other boys while he's still a boy himself (a frequent tactic of pedophiles as it both provides a less-creepy-seeming initial contact with the target boy and also increases the first boy's feelings of not being able to tell without getting into trouble along with the adult[s])? Will he ever figure out that and how he was hypnotized as part of his indoctrination and how will he feel if he does? Will he ever turn in his father or the other boy-lovers, or himself? Will he and Scott ever see each other again if Scott winds up shipped off to a new Daddy far away?

With most chapters having a comment from an older Ben/Landen, and this being a "flashback" story (Chapter 1), I'd say we'll find out.

Woe Murderknow that where I draw the line. That is simply criminal. I expected better of Mr Poor. I think it would have been beneath hem to simply resort to Murder. :-\ Ernie :)PS Love your story. More more.

So what boy's body was in the house with Ms. Pence when the house exploded and burned? Was it Scott? It was not Canyon and it was not Bennie, so who was it? Perhaps a street urchin?

Or perhaps no bodies were found and we only think that somebody died.

Maybe they all are on their way to the Middle East...

Maybe something will go wrong with the numbing injection. Landen's penis is permently numb so he decides to be nullified. Canyon also decides to be nullified so that they can be the same.