How to PISS off a Christian...

[Francis (imported)]

Check it out!

CLICK HERE! (http://ezinearticles.com/?Questions-You ... &id=103223)

No offense to those who might be pissed off already...

....you do not have to piss off MUSLIMS... they are already pissed off...

This is quite a simple topic I don't know what all the furor above is really about.

You piss off christians, muslims and in fact almost any of the religous pursuasion, in exactly the same way. Just knock them down, stand on their ass, open your fly and do it. Just make sure when you knock them down you do a good job of it so they can't repay the favour. I can assure that they will then be really and genuinely pissed off in all respects.

If you only want to piss on them you can do that while he (she or it) are standing up the same way a dog does. They will then be pissed on as well as pissed off a far better outcome all round but you had better be prepared to run!!D

[augman7518 (imported)]

THOU SHALT WHAT? If creationists want to beleive the earth is only10,000 to 50,000 years old despite overwhelming scientifif evidence to the contrary,thats finewith me.They can beleive the world is flat,for all I care.But when creationists assert that all hunanity desended from one man and woman,I wonder if they considered the most obvious implication of thsi belief.If the story of Adam and Eve were a literal one,that would mean all of us are the end product of an act considered to be one of the most vile and disgustingin cultures the world over;incest,for Adam and Eve,s children to have had offspring of their own,they would have had to mate with their own siblings or with their own parents.It would have taken a couple of generations of rampant incest before a personcould have made the choice to mate with someone who was not an immediate relative.Would jesus freaks have us believe that the idea of screwing one,s own familymenbers was somehow less sickining to people back then.

[augman7518 (imported)]

For real happness for a catholic, mention that the pope has a name that fits a catholic clergyTell him benedick seems to fit as Time reported that 75% of clergy were gay.Ask if there ever been a benedick in his mouth or benedick up his backside.Most of them never heard this and it is what some people believe.This tends to upset some people.

[kristoff]

For real happness for a catholic, mention that the pope has a name that fits a catholic clergyTell him benedick seems to fit as Time reported that 75% of clergy were gay.Ask if there ever been a benedick in his mouth or benedick up his backside.Most of them never heard this and it is what some people believe.This tends to upset some people.

I assume someone was once a practicing Catholic.....

However, I do appreciate your observations, viz, "benedick." As an erstwhile and very short term member of a monastery, I can attest to the accuracy, at least at that location, of the question "benedick" there? I suspect the 75% figure, from only my own experience, may well be accurate. Some of them were even cute, and even better than.....

Of course, I gave up being Catholic long ago. However, I was finally able to forgive them for being who they are. That way I could leave them behind. I hope one day you may find that forgiveness, and exorcise the bitterness.

Shit! The damned nun sounds like a frigging pope!

[IbPervert (imported)]

THOU SHALT WHAT? If creationists want to beleive the earth is only10,000 to 50,000 years old despite overwhelming scientifif evidence to the contrary,thats finewith me.They can beleive the world is flat,for all I care.But when creationists assert that all hunanity desended from one man and woman,I wonder if they considered the most obvious implication of thsi belief.If the story of Adam and Eve were a literal one,that would mean all of us are the end product of an act considered to be one of the most vile and disgustingin cultures the world over;incest,for Adam and Eve,s children to have had offspring of their own,they would have had to mate with their own siblings or with their own parents.It would have taken a couple of generations of rampant incest before a personcould have made the choice to mate with someone who was not an immediate relative.Would jesus freaks have us believe that the idea of screwing one,s own familymenbers was somehow less sickining to people back then.

Something that occurred to me recently...by saying that the world was created in seven days means they are saying that God is incapable of creating any other way!

By beaning against abortion your saying that every time a sperm and egg meet and undergo fertilization God has to put a soul into that body, and God is incapable of seeing far enough into the future to know if that potential baby will get aborted. What sort of God is that?

[JoaoGenerico (imported)]

I'll preface this by saying that I am not a Christian. However...

I've never understood why, if God is all-powerful, He could not have used evolution as his tool to create man. As part of that, why do our concept of days have to correspond with His? Why can't the scientific explanations of the Big Bang and the creation of our universe be the methods by which He created everything?

But if every fact of the world may be explained by the laws of nature and god then just "has chosen" to make the World exactly as it it, the concept of god becomes semantically empty.

(You know the classic argument of the "intangible gnome sitting on your lap" or something like that...)

[Blaise (imported)]

I am a Christian though my atheist former wife could not understand how I was different for her.

[george2u2 (imported)]

I usually ask them if they really follow Christ.

If they say yes. I ask them if I can meet thier 12 boyfriends. If they say no. I ask if thay will ungird and wash my feet?

If they don't have a foot fetish or 12 boyfriends I ask them if they ever took off their blinders when they read the book?

I had a gay Catholic priest laughing at an interfaith panel discussion.

[Blaise (imported)]

I usually ask them if they really follow Christ.

If they say yes. I ask them if I can meet thier 12 boyfriends. If they say no. I ask if thay will ungird and wash my feet?

If they don't have a foot fetish or 12 boyfriends I ask them if they ever took off their blinders when they read the book?

I had a gay Catholic priest laughing at an interfaith panel discussion.

When I was a teenager, I assumed that Jesus was homosexual even if I did not really know much about the notion. Just seemed to be who he was.

[Riverwind (imported)]

Another way is to tell him a nice Muslim family is moving in next door.

There building a Mosque across the street.

The rapture has come and gone and they got left behind.

The root of all religions goes back to the pagan's

OK, Am I'm going to get hammered again I see.

River