tugon (imported) wrote: Sun Jan 22, 2017 12:52 pm He was an unknown when he first came in to apply but presented himself well. After he was hired his behaviors and performance began to decline. As I worked with him he began to disclose his previous actions regarding his behaviors at terminations. Many can act like they have it together for a few weeks but eventually the damaged personality reveals itself.

That is unusual. I was at my present job for a year before I revealed the actual reasons I decided to leave (at my own initiative) my prior position. I don't like to trash-talk employers former or current, but I felt I had been where I was long enough to state that things were getting bad where I was (for the specific company, not that I was being bad) and when it seemed that nobody was interested in doing anything to work on turning things around I felt it best to seek another position elsewhere. As part of the conversation I said I didn't just seek any position when I landed where I'm at now, and that I looked for a specific employer that seemed to know how to take actions and make course corrections when necessary. I did couch the bad parts from my previous position with the good parts (IE it seemed there was no motivation to make the appropriate corrections, but the people I worked with were also good and doing the best with what they had).

The guy you're talking about sounds a lot like a more like a more awful/aggressive version of my older brother. Comes in thinking he's the new sheriff in town and that everyone sucks. I've been trying to nudge my brother out of that attitude for years. Doubt he'll ever change. *shrugs* It's a horrible thing when you encounter those people in the workplace. They suck motivation out of it, and generally make everyone miserable.

A guest checked in at the Hotel and she said she was in town for a funeral. I asked her who she was in town to pay her respects for and she named someone who had been a friend to my aunt and uncle. She of course knew them and we had a nice talk. As she was checking out she said "I am so sorry to hear about your aunt". I had to ask what she meant and she informed me she passed away on 12/05/16.

Of my remaining aunt, cousins, and uncle I heard this news from no one but a poor guest who felt very bad that she let me know.

It is sad, but true, that sometimes strangers are more kind than family is. --FLO--

Uncle Flo (imported) wrote: Fri Jan 27, 2017 11:58 am It is sad, but true, that sometimes strangers are more kind than family is. --FLO--

You are correct. I have tried to fit in and bend to their expectations and in 60 years I have nothing to show for it. Finding out about my aunt was such a wake up call for me.

I must admit knowing that you will never be a true part of the family is rather freeing. I am becoming more aware with who I am instead of what I have endured. I have been changed in many ways but I need to focus on the today me and what I now have to offer. The negativity of the family kept me focused on what I was not able to be for them. Finally I have given myself permission to live for me.

I think I realize now that family is like a pack of Rattle Snakes. I thought my family was different because they were Christians, but no it is not.

I think it is time for a cat scan of my abdomen. Since my New Years Day belly flop onto this good earth I have been slowly healing. The ribs are almost pain free and the effects of the concussion have subsided. The impact to my abdomen have continued to frustrate me.

My recent struggle is with being incontinent of stool. Mostly while out walking the dog a good distance from home. Luckily this phenomena only happens for the nightly walk when everyone is in bed. This reduces the embarrassment but not the discomfort of the event. Nor does it reduce the number of times I must do laundry. Everything else is healing but my digestive track seems to be in more distress. Due to my love of wine I did check out the symptoms of pancreatitis. I have no pain after eating, no vomiting, no rise in temperature or blood pressure just loose bowels.

Monday I went to my annual eye exam and the doctor saw some dried blood in one eye. No signs of retinopathy and I shared with her the fall that may have caused the bleed. She agreed that it could have been caused b the fall. Oh and one eye has the beginnings of a cataract. I am also starting on vitamins for my macular.

A friend and neighbor who provides support to people with developmental disabilities was recently very sympathetic to one of her clients. This gentleman had a torsional twist to his remaining testicle so it had to be removed in the emergency department. He lost his first one in much the same way. She is a little over the top in how upset she is for him and he is only worried about losing his job for taking time off.

The gentleman has never shown interest in dating or having a relationship. He certainly never wanted to have children as he states "they are too expensive." I explained that with the change in hormones that may change for him. He may require more affection than previously. I tried to share much of what I could remember so she would be prepared. She is sure he will be given HRT but her population she serves are not the best at following instructions or remembering to take medications.

I asked if he might benefit from an online site that dealt with being a eunuch and the effects he would be facing. She thought that would be beyond his abilities. She said to me that most of her male friends would grab themselves and grimace if they were told about that loss. Yet I was so calm and trying to prepare her. I did tell her it must be time working in the hospital and all I saw.

I am surprised that she has never asked how I know so much. That may cross her mind after she accepts what happened to her client. She was so shocked they did it right there in the ER and I said "hell it can be done in a cheap motel room."

Yesterday I arrived for an appointment with my new doctor 20 minutes before 1 PM. At 1:03 PM I was taken back to an examining room. The nurse came promptly in and checked my blood pressure, pulse and temperature. Before 1:10 PM the doctor knocked on the door and came in to begin the appointment. Since this was my first appointment she spent over an hour with me. After the time she spent with me the nurse came in and drew some blood the doctor had ordered. At 2:40 PM I had plenty of time to get to work on time.

Wow a doctor who wanted to know me to provide good care. Instead of criticism I received encouragement. She had a way about her that caused me to open up and share some of the rough times of life. She wants to help me physically but also wants me to see someone who can help me emotionally. I have never been treated with such kindness and respect. Wow again because I have heard of good doctors but never had one before.

While I have been typing the office called to tell me my lab work was all normal but my liver enzymes were elevated a couple of points. My A1c was a little high and she is thinking of a change in meds on my next appointment. I will see her again in a month as she studies my past labs and we decide on goals. I feel like I have someone on my team guiding me instead of someone only knowing my numbers and much disapproval.

One thing I am considering is my doctor's request that I talk with the intake nurse at a psychiatrist's office. I had mentioned some residual sadness and depression due to events in my life. I can be a chameleon and become what the doctor wants me to be. I have always needed someone who could cut through my manipulation and make me be real. I also wonder if I would be going for true help or attention. Sometimes I feel very honest and genuine and at others I am attention seeking. I am doubting the benefits and wondering if I would just be wasting someone's time.