I have been assisting with the care of an elderly neighbor with dementia. His wife was having health problems and they could no longer walk together. When I learned of this I invited him to go on walks with my dog and me. As his dementia progresses I have helped with transportation to doctors' offices, visited him in a nursing home and with my knowledge asked why basic issues of care were not being met. I was being a good advocate for him since the wife was from the generation that does not assert herself and her concerns.

I just found out the son that never comes around and hates his father is against my helping. Apparently he and his wife checked me out on Facebook and I am a fucking faggot. I am despicable. I should not be around his 86 year old father. Yes folks no good deed goes unpunished. Hurting a little right now but it will give me a little more time for myself.

At least my earlier dementia patient was pleased with all I accomplished. He could not log on to his Yahoo account and could not remember his password. I called Yahoo and they were hesitant to give it to me. My client was in the background repeating fix my computer and his dog was barking continuously. I am not sure if it was the frustration in my voice or my threat to come through the phone lines and get him that worked. Then we went to see him mom in the nursing home.

@tugon, you just have to do what you are doing, your compassion and care is wonderful, but unfortuanately a great prod of guilt to the son. God bless you for caring there is not enough of it around.

Oh my 60 years old today. I am as surprised as the people who know me. Between my self destructive behaviors and others' destructive behaviors directed toward myself, I have survived. From castration in a cheap motel room by a hack. I still attribute my becoming a eunuch as the reason I am still here.

So off to work I go today. Being alive is quite the celebration. I remember during a time of great emotional and physical pain I thought I was ready to go at 45. I would never had made it to Paris. I would never have had the great joy my dog brings to my life. I would not be able to enjoy my art or the music I have collected. People both good and bad that have either enriched my life or taught me to avoid the red flags. Life is sweeter than I could have imagined at one point.

Happy Birthday, and indeed, congratulations on making it this far!:balsmilie

Best wishes for a happy birthday, and an even better year to come!

Happy 60th birthday from a 70 year old who wishes you to be as happy at my age as you are now. --FLO--

Thanks all for the birthday wishes.

My sister-in-law called today. She shared that my brother has cancer and it is terminal. They tried radiation and he went to the Mayo clinic for treatments but nothing can be done. Now pain management is the focus of his care. They waited until there were no options left to tell us.

He has two sons that love him very much and are struggling with the news. I knew it was going to be bad news if she called me personally instead of having a family member pass on the news. My brother was always the physically fit, active one of us and as the youngest I thought my older sister and I would go first. She and I are the overweight diabetic ones and yet we live.

Too much to process right now. I had too many questions to ask but it did not seem the right time. I am sure we will be heading out West to see him. Just blown away by the news.

Happy Birthday!

All best wishes to you and Mr Corky

Wow it snuck up on me. I began to notice things were not as they once were. I used to pride myself on a well decorated home and my art I have collected. It had been a time since I would walk around with a glass of wine and enjoy the paintings and the memories of the areas and countries where they were discovered. TV began to be annoying and too simplistic to enjoy. Music, solitude and my dog is what I looked forward to at the end of the day.

As I have posted a number of friends, family and a lover disappointed me greatly. One thing I have noticed is my inability to move on from the hurts and sorrows. I have always had to be resilient but it seems I can only dwell on the hurt and my thoughts of bad things to come their way. Bitterness does not become me.

I have almost no tolerance for stupid. I am so tired of people telling me they do not know what I am saying due to my vocabulary and how I construct sentences. Well they do not say how I construct sentences but I do tend to be fairly formal in my manner of speaking at work and I enjoy words. A guest recently called down with a noise complaint and she asked "Do you have a mechanism in place to deal with a noise complaint"? I assured her we do and I will address it post haste. I loved her way of speaking and would have loved to talk to her more. Plix and I were going into a restaurant and this very elegant woman stopped as she was leaving to tell me "This place will positively ruin your appetite" so I had to ask her what she enjoyed that was so delicious. I followed her suggestion and had a wonderful lunch.

I recently was horrified to learn that the very wealthy as part of their investments are buying incredible art not to display and enjoy but to store in environments to protect the art as the value of art increases. Ya I never really looked at if but it will be worth more one day. I hate greed but I do not hate people because they have money I only hate those who only want money. One reserve has over 1,000 Picassos' and I doubt Pablo painted them to be locked away as the values increased. I have been lucky enough to visit some of the best art museums in the world and just cannot imagine the walls being bare for an investment.

Today I am upset over a gorilla being killed to protect a young boy at the Cincinnati Zoo. The child was able to get beyond a barrier and drop into the gorilla enclosure. I know kids can get away from parent too easily and suffer the consequences. At the hospital I did CPR on a number of young children who got outside and into trouble. I just wish the parents had been more diligent so this did not happen. The gorilla is endangered and people are not.

A young man who is like my son called and he asks some incredible probing questions. I mentioned I heard from my dying brother and we had a nice conversation and some tears. He asked how I felt? My brother had a struggle having a gay brother in this ugly small town. He was never able to understand that it was incredibly tough being gay. We of course did not discuss those issues but he shared with me how the cancer was discovered and the failed attempts to treat it. I shared this with my son and again he asked how I felt. I had to be honest and admit I felt nothing. I could intellectualize feelings but could not feel anything. I could empathize for his wife and sons but not feel anything for myself. I had to admit I was dead inside.

I went to my doctor for a routine diabetic check up. My numbers were elevated and I finally admitted that I am not a compliant diabetic and I do not care. When I went to pick up my meds there was a new one and I asked what it was and the clerk said it is an antidepressant.