mrt (imported) wrote: Sat Nov 29, 2008 3:57 pm I think its great that you have a romantic interest. I think if nothing else it has to be flattering to be wanted! That never hurts....

Do tread carefully however if you don't feel the same way. But if you do? Well you have someone thats not going to be full of drama and surprises because you have known each other for so long.

And love is such an important part of the whole sexual thing for most people. When the friendship, are secure first you can at least go forward with a little less unwanted drama.

Hi MrT,

I just want to be clear that I never told my friend I had a romantic interest in her, although I was totally honest when I told her I was flattered by her comment on 'dating'. Although I certainly did not close the door on a possible future romantic relationship, I doubt that I am ready for that with anyone. My life is changing rapidly and I do not want her to get hurt by this.

At the same time, we do love each other. I can imagine a future together even though we are very different in some ways. There are many other ways in which our interests match.

We would be an odd couple in some ways. I like to dress well and feel very feminine in nylons. The feel and freedom of dresses and skirts seem like one of the privileges that goes with being female. None of this interests my friend and that is totally OK by me. She does not even own a dress. I am not sure she has a purse, either.

Over the last month or so, the changes in my life have seemed to accelerate. I am at least partially discarding life-long interests and hobbies. Not because they were not fun but they were hobbies of my constructed male persona. That male person built to fit in with men so I could feel I belonged; that other person who was not genuinely me but had others (and myself) fooled for decades. I was not fooled all the time.

My newly emerging true female self now wants to explore and discover her own interests. Some of those may mesh with old ones. Others will be entirely new.

This process can be confusing to me because, in some ways, I am behaving like a teenage girl. My interests can fluctuate from day to day. At times it seems I just cannot make up my mind on what I want. I know I want 'something'.

I now question my educational and career choices because they seem out of sync with my true self. Right now, I have a strong dislike for my job. That's a big change because I used to look forward to getting into work. What does all this mean and can I, or should I, do anything about it? Perhaps my best hope is to start looking at what I do in a different way to make my job fun again. Then again, in a few years I may change careers.

My friend and I will always be close and I am very glad she is there. Perhaps something more will develop as time goes by.

Danya (imported) wrote: Sat Nov 29, 2008 7:39 pm This process can be confusing to me because, in some ways, I am behaving like a teenage girl. My interests can fluctuate from day to day. At times it seems I just cannot make up my mind on what I want. I know I want 'something'.

Redefining oneself is an interesting experience. After all I am not quite 11 years old as a eunuch. Remember it has not been that long ago that you started puberty as a female. Enjoy and learn from every stage of your metamorphosis.

tugon (imported) wrote: Sat Nov 29, 2008 8:27 pm Redefining oneself is an interesting experience. After all I am not quite 11 years old as a eunuch. Remember it has not been that long ago that you started puberty as a female. Enjoy and learn from every stage of your metamorphosis.

Tugon, my friend, I know you understand and I value that. You are absolutely correct. Sometimes I need to remember the 'enjoy' part. I am happy but I don't always have enough fun!

Another friend commented that I really am like a 13 year old in the body of a 56 year old. Sometimes, my body doesn't have the stamina to keep up with the desires of the young teen who often refuses to slow down. I am sure all this will come together with time. It can be a wild ride.

Hugs,

Danya

I've lived as a woman for 10yrs from NYC to SF.

Many women, upon meeting me, could not take their eyes off of my A then B tits and tried to feel them up.

I found that many lesbians are turned on by HRT-TGs & TSs, just like many gays, TGs & TSs who are turned on by lesbians. As you probably know, lesbians don't need a cock to have fantastic sex.

Happy Xmas gurlz,

- GG

I felt a bit like a kid going through puberty when I went on HRT. The changes are probably better done at a later age I think. My first puberty was full of embarrassments the second a bit less so and not quite as long.

Unlike you I went through it with the same gender fuel so I don't have that total rewiring to complicate things. Your comment about being a "girly girl" is kind of funny and from what I gather fairly common in TS people. I say why not go for it? Your probably dealing with a lot of repression for a large part of your life. This is a form of release (total) to be fem so why not embrace some of that. I mean without going crazy... I think I agree with the other poster that some people are attracted to TS people. Hormones, etc are not about having sex but they sure are "about" sex. And putting the brain ON sex and thinking about it tends to stir things up.

I applaud your not wanting to complicate things while your in transition. I think its probably important to stay focused and get yourself taken care of. As to school... You and I are going through a similar change of life thing? I'm starting to wonder if some higher education in fields I wasn't into before might be of value.

gildedgurl (imported) wrote: Sun Nov 30, 2008 6:11 am I've lived as a woman for 10yrs from NYC to SF.

Many women, upon meeting me, could not take their eyes off of my A then B tits and tried to feel them up.

I found that many lesbians are turned on by HRT-TGs & TSs, just like many gays, TGs & TSs who are turned on by lesbians. As you probably know, lesbians don't need a cock to have fantastic sex.

Happy Xmas gurlz,

- GG

Hi gildedgirl,

I enjoyed reading your interesting story. Certainly there are many ways of sharing sexual pleasure that do not require the presence of a male. I'll see what may develop with my lesbian friend.

Happy Holidays,

Danya

...

mrt (imported) wrote: Sun Nov 30, 2008 11:45 am Unlike you I went through it with the same gender fuel so I don't have that total rewiring to complicate things. Your comment about being a "girly girl" is kind of funny and from what I gather fairly common in TS people. I say why not go for it? Your probably dealing with a lot of repression for a large part of your life. This is a form of release (total) to be fem so why not embrace some of that. I mean without going crazy...

I hadn't really thought of my desire to dress up and feel really feminine as a 'girly girl' thing, although I am glad you find it amusing! I understand what you mean and 'girly girl' does fit me, even if I might choose different words. Maybe something like a very feminine woman.

You are right, this kind of thing is very common with TS women. It's also common for female transsexuals to want be blonde. I wanted that, too, but brunette works much better with my skin tone.

mrt (imported) wrote: Sun Nov 30, 2008 11:45 am I applaud your not wanting to complicate things while your in transition. I think its probably important to stay focused and get yourself taken care of. As to school... You and I are going through a similar change of life thing? I'm starting to wonder if some higher education in fields I wasn't into before might be of value.

I do need to let things get a bit more focused for me before I decide on any potentially life-changing decisions. I might go back to school at some point to get a degree in something far removed from my earlier education.

For now, though, I need to put thoughts of education on hold. I need to allow time to socialize. That's how I better learn who I am. It's also what I want and need right now.

Hugs,

Danya

I have found that I am predominantly a night person, which appears to be the norm for my age. Even in my 20s now, I still enjoy staying up late and sleeping in. I hate having to get up before 10 AM, and I'm not pleased about going to bed before midnight. My ideal job would be something involving a swing shift because I could sleep through the morning and go to work in the afternoon, then have a few hours of playtime when I get home before having to go to bed again. Somehow I am dragging myself out of bed at 7 AM on Monday and Wednesday for a class, but I don't look forward to it. Fortunately next semester the earliest I will have to get up will be 8. Still far too early, but better than 7.

This world is definitely designed for the morning person. Just like it's designed for right-handed people, extroverts, those with common sense, those with mechanical abilities, and everything else I am not

Danya (imported) wrote: Sun Nov 30, 2008 3:59 pm I hadn't really thought of my desire to dress up and feel really feminine as a 'girly girl' thing, although I am glad you find it amusing! I understand what you mean and 'girly girl' does fit me, even if I might choose different words. Maybe something like a very feminine woman.

You are right, this kind of thing is very common with TS women. It's also common for female transsexuals to want be blonde. I wanted that, too, but brunette works much better with my skin tone.

I do need to let things get a bit more focused for me before I decide on any potentially life-changing decisions. I might go back to school at some point to get a degree in something far removed from my earlier education.

For now, though, I need to put thoughts of education on hold. I need to allow time to socialize. That's how I better learn who I am. It's also what I want and need right now.

Hugs,

Danya

Girly Girl might come across as demeaning so... oops. Its our family word for doing all the fem things. Having seen you Blonde let me tell you how much better I think you look as a brunette!

Re the other point. Maybe m2f TS people and men think of "female" as Marilyn Monroe or Barbie? but... Thats kind of shallow. I think. Lets face it Paula Prentis stirred a lot of hormones for many young lads and she was a brunette! Of course Doris Day was pretty hot too....

I thought more about what your friend was not into and perhapes part of that is about her being lesbian? I can't remember the terms and such but some women are ubber fem and others semi reject that or are only into that for their partners. I dunno...

I agree with your last point. Get out. Give yourself time to figure out who the real you is. I think its a good thing for a lot of us and might save on the therapy costs! I think your new puberty will give you a lot of challanges most of which will be good. Just remember this is puberty part duex you don't need to repeat ANY of the bad things with part one. Or is that Du?

-hugs - MrT *MrT hugs?!?!?

plix (imported) wrote: Mon Dec 01, 2008 7:01 pm I have found that I am predominantly a night person, which appears to be the norm for my age. Even in my 20s now, I still enjoy staying up late and sleeping in. I hate having to get up before 10 AM, and I'm not pleased about going to bed before midnight. My ideal job would be something involving a swing shift because I could sleep through the morning and go to work in the afternoon, then have a few hours of playtime when I get home before having to go to bed again. Somehow I am dragging myself out of bed at 7 AM on Monday and Wednesday for a class, but I don't look forward to it. Fortunately next semester the earliest I will have to get up will be 8. Still far too early, but better than 7.

This world is definitely designed for the morning person. Just like it's designed for right-handed people, extroverts, those with common sense, those with mechanical abilities, and everything else I am not

But is the appeal that staying up late is taboo? I think in our 20 year olds case it better matches her need to avoid all possible contact with us...