I agree with you devi, wether or not I'd have sex with a male or female would only depends of who they are, even though I'm mostly gay if I had to choose between a nice female or a disgusting male, I'd choose the female. The sexologist Nancy Friday made this clear in some of the books she wrote, male and female can have sex with both sex. She said that all males, once in theirs will fantasized about an other male and I guess, it's the same thing with females. Straight males are rather reluctant to admit it.

I have been with both and both have been pleasurable but prefer women. I guess this would make me a little bi if we are putting labels on people? No one is 100 percent anything I suppose. I don't like to be in charge so a dominant woman or man will get it done for me.

The mistake everyone makes about describing orientation is that they describe it in terms of likes. But really it is about dislikes. For example a straight guy isn't straight because he likes women, he is straight because he dislikes guys. This is why people get confused about bisexuality -- they may still "prefer" one, but if they don't dislike the other then I'd say they fit the definition of bisexual. And if you dislike both then you're asexual.

As a really straight guy (who is perfectly accepting of people of all other orientations) I have to say that I've never even been slightly curious about being with a guy. I have a pure aversion to it. Touching another guy (like if I have to sit next to one on a plane) gives me as much physical displeasure as the pleasure I get when pressed against a woman. It is really physical, I'm quite sure I don't have any mental hangup about it. Basically my dislike of being physically intimate with guys is about the same as my aversion to stepping on a slug with my bare foot or something -- just a fundamental "eww gross" feeling.

So SplitDik's definition of orientation goes like this:

- hetereosexual = dislikes same sex, doesn't dislike opposite sex

- homosexual = doesn't dislike same sex, dislikes opposite sex

- bisexual = doesn't dislike same sex, doesn't dislike opposite sex

- asexual = dislikes same sex, dislikes opposite sex

I think you'll find these definitions are more useful and less confusing/ambiguous than defining them based on likes.

paring (imported) wrote: Mon Aug 29, 2011 1:24 pm I agree with you devi, wether or not I'd have sex with a male or female would only depends of who they are, even though I'm mostly gay if I had to choose between a nice female or a disgusting male, I'd choose the female. The sexologist Nancy Friday made this clear in some of the books she wrote, male and female can have sex with both sex. She said that all males, once in theirs will fantasized about an other male and I guess, it's the same thing with females. Straight males are rather reluctant to admit it.

No, I know it is a cliche to assume that everyone has some gay tendencies, but I can really honestly say that I don't. I'm not against homosexuality or anything, and have lived a very libertine lifestyle and have all sorts of orientations of friends. However, touching a guy intimately is just as icky to me as having a spider crawl on my face or something. The real test is what type of porn a person browses, since then it doesn't have to do with admitting anything. I not only have never ever looked at gay porn, but I don't even like straight porn where there is a guy in the picture. It ruins it for me. Just like getting a bowl of icecream with a shit on top. Only solo girls or lesbian are interesting to me.

I agree there is a scale of orientations, and there is all types. But there are people on the ends of the scale too -- i.e. totally straight or totally gay.

My gay cousin once said something similar. I asked what he actually thinks of regarding sex with women and he said he doesn't like them because they have eggs inside them and it reminds him of a spider.

Anyway, comparison to spiders is appropriate because it is a physical aversion. It's just like there are foods that some people like that some people really can't stand. You can't say that everyone likes all food any more than you can say everyone is interested in gay sex.

Everybody is a bisexual:

A eunuch is considered a "male". However this person may have a soft sweet voice, softer skin, no facial hair, hardly anything in the way of genitalia and for all practical purposes be female. In other words this could be a female without a vagina. So if a "heterosexual" male were to find himself attracted to such a person he could be considered as having "homosexual" tendencies without even knowing it.

There are many such persons and for every person like this there are at least ten suiters for this type of eunuch. In high school you may have been attracted to such a person WITHOUT EVEN KNOWING IT.

(BTW, Couldn't many XY and X females be considered to be the true eunuchs -which are actually males.)