Questions after the cut

[Friage01 (imported)]

Thank you wheelyfixed for your response

I don’t think you understand fully the subject matter , are you qualified in any area of psychology or sexual issues ,

There are men who simply want to be eunuchs , they do not identify with being feminine in any way , I would never see my self as having an gender identity issue .

I see myself as quiet quiet normal , I love my penis but want the calmness of being a eunuch , as an adult with a desire to have the procedure , it’s such a pity that the service is not available to people like me . It’s about having control over our bodies just like some women want control over their bodies in abortion cases .

thank you anyway for your opinion although I found it presumptive and unhelpful

I found his reply in post #25 to be very informative. I might have used 'Trans/Gender clinic' instead of "Trans-Gender clinic" in case someone was sensitive to being called "Trans". Otherwise, he was very helpful. If you read the SOC chapter 9 you would understand the reasons, he said what he did.

Not understanding (or reading) the WPATH SOC 8 is surprisingly common. Last year, I went to see a therapist who said she worked on the SOC but didn't have a clue when I was trying to discuss Chapter 9. After we reviewed the publication, she provided me a letter. Somewhat similar issue happened when I first contacted a very well-known surgical group and got push back when I said I, as AMAB, identified as male. His reply was "this is a transgender clinic". I am due to have additional surgery there before this month is out!

[Friage01 (imported)]

Justme, it wasn't that there was little sex in my marriage. My wife had sex with me. Frequently. 4-5 times a week. But it wasn't like either of us really enjoyed it either. She was uncomfortable, sometimes I would hit it the wrong way and she would flench. Sometimes she would complain of pain afterward. I Love that woman! I hated myself for doing that to her. After she was diagnosed with a uterine prolapse, and I understood it really was something physical, not just in her mind, I tried to cut back to once a week. Usually I couldn't make it past 4-5 days. She handled that well. Give her some time to recover I guess. I didn't I became really nasty, short, mean.

Now, by this time I had been talking for some time of getting castrated. I reached out to an understanding surgeon a couple years back. All she required was an ok from a mental health professional and a pre-op ok from a Dr. Her office referred me to an understanding mental health Dr. After talking with the surgeon, she didn't think I would have a problem getting a letter, and we set a surgery date in June of 2023.

The psychiatrist was very understanding. Had helped many men in my situation. He was willing to write the letter, but suggested that my wife and I get checked out for physical problems first. I went to the Dr. First. A couple health issues were found that I needed to address before I considered surgery. I canceled the date. It was harder to get my wife to the Dr. But a burst ovarian cyst finally talked her into going in this past spring. And I've told you what she found then.

Now my wife was always hesitant about me getting cut, but when I brought it back up at the end of June, both of us were tired of what the limited sex was doing to me, she said go for it. She didn't see another option. I set the wheels back in motion, and on August 28th I was castrated. She took a week off from work to nurse me through recovery. By the time she went back to work results were already noticeable. She loves on me a lot more now. She says I'm easier to love. I think its because she knows I won't need sex. We've been having sex once a week. I'm not a beast in between. I think as a woman she still likes to know that she's desirable. I don't know how long I can keep that up, but I would be ok now without it. She says she would be too.

Now with us, it was Love at first sight. For the last 26 years we have absolutely adored one another. Without a doubt we are soul mates. Back in June she told me I was making her life hell. That's when we made some decisions and took some steps. Last week she confided in me that she had been considering leaving to try to shock me into change. That would have decimated me. Even if she had come back, and she would have, she loves me, I would have never recovered from that. Now we are so happy. Things are better than they have been for years.

Maybe if I had 'the cut' earlier, I wouldn't be single now. Glad it worked out for you, and your wife!

[WheelyFixed]

Wheely, I've been taking gabapentin for over a year now for neuropothy in my feet. It got terrible after I got my sugar under control. Doc said that improves for most people, but it seems I wasn't one of the lucky ones. The soles of my feet hurt so bad that I truly hated to walk. It would hurt so bad that it would hurt up to my knees. The main side effect I've had is that I can tolerate the pain in my feet. Now, if I have a little brain fog, that doesn't bother me near as bad as my feet did. My cousin told me about the lyrica. I may ask about it. But for right now, well, with gabapentin is better than without.

If the gabapentin is helping you, great! I don't want you to think I'm saying not to use it... I'm just saying that I've seen considerable discussion about it as neuropathic pain is a major concern for many SCI folks, especially those with traumatic injuries, and the gabapentin type drugs are often mentioned; with brain fog as one of the often reported side effects. It MIGHT be worth talking with your docs about changing which drug / dose etc.. but I'm not saying you should do anything without their advice.

WheelyFixed

[WheelyFixed]

Thank you wheelyfixed for your response

I don’t think you understand fully the subject matter , are you qualified in any area of psychology or sexual issues ,

There are men who simply want to be eunuchs , they do not identify with being feminine in any way , I would never see my self as having an gender identity issue .

I see myself as quiet quiet normal , I love my penis but want the calmness of being a eunuch , as an adult with a desire to have the procedure , it’s such a pity that the service is not available to people like me . It’s about having control over our bodies just like some women want control over their bodies in abortion cases .

thank you anyway for your opinion although I found it presumptive and unhelpful

I'm sorry you were offended by my post, my apologies as none was intended... I don't have any 'qualifications' if you mean pieces of paper... But I've been through the SOC v8 process, and have read pretty much everything I can get access to on this topic for whatever that is worth...

I'm not THAT far from you, judging by your posts - I have no desire to be female, and the breast growth is about the only part of being castrated that I DON'T like... Before my SCI I enjoyed an active (albeit quite 'vanilla') sex life w/ my GF. After my injury left me non-functional, I was just frustrated, and getting fixed has helped that a lot.

While I'd love to see the ability to get castrated on demand with minimal hoop jumping, the fact today is that you have to get past the shrinks to get to the operating room. THEY will insist on slapping labels on you, and you will get a 'gender dysphoria' tag as soon as you say that you want to get rid of your testicles.... Gender Dysphoria is considered to be a form of gender identity issue, which means ONLY that you aren't happy being a standard intact male, and want to change to something else....

My first visit with the TG doc included her saying that in order to proceed, I was going to have to be labeled as gender dysphoric and apologizing to me about the label being required...

WheelyFixed

[michaeld (imported)]

at what hospital or clinic did you have your surgery?

[TheHavier (imported)]

Wheely, you ain't the first! Whenever I say gabapentin, most people who've heard of it wrinkle up their nose. But, take statins for instance, they absolutely killed me. Made me hurt from the hips down. I know a lot of people that take the exact same statin and it helps them with no side effects. People's body chemistry is different. Guess mine is different.

[Castratedstud (imported)]

Have you lost any strength or energy?

[TheHavier (imported)]

Not that I can tell. I do moderately physical stuff and I am constantly moving. I do think I've put on a few pounds.

[Castratedstud (imported)]

I see. Your two months is coming up, wish everything is doing well. Tomorrow I will give myself last shot of Testosterone will do 20mg only. Then gonna stop taking it. Hopefully this time I can push it past 4 week mark. I’ll go do a blood work by end of November, make sure everything is good.

[TheHavier (imported)]

Well, as of yesterday, I have been castrated for two months. Still very happy with the outcome. The incision is completely healed. Climbing on a ladder all day will make me feel where the cords were cut, but nothing bad. The relationship between my wife and I has improved. We Love on one another more than we did before. My wife initiates more than she did. I asked her about it. She told me, " You don't get mad now because you don't get it." Well, she's right.

Two months without balls and my sex drive is still higher than my wife's. We still have sex, about once a week. I start to get antzy after 5-6 days. I orgasm, most times, but if I don't it doesn't bother me. I no longer ejaculate. I kinda miss that, but it doesn't bother me. My wife really seems to really appreciate that! I still get morning wood, sometimes. Erections don't come as often as they did. We have to work a little harder to get it hard enough, but we still can.

I still have a few hot flashes, but either they're not as often, or I don't notice them as much. I haven't noticed a loss of strength, but even before I was cut I wasn't as strong as I was 10 years ago. My beard doesn't grow quite as fast as it did, but yes, I am a bearded eunuch.

Bottom line. I am much happier, and a lot less frustrated. I am a lot less likely to get mad. My wife and I are closer. All because I was willing to get de-nutted. I'm glad I did.