philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Nov 30, 2004 1:23 am Its been three months since my trip to seattle and I have

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 03, 2004 10:26 pm healed from my injuries. It turns out my right testis (t

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Nov 30, 2004 1:23 am he one that stayed with me ) wasn't producing

Testosterone so a month after the trip i was blind sided by withdeawalls. fortunately i had friends who were both paitent and compassionet thanks to them i have survived the road to eunuchdom with my mind intact. Thanks and hugs go out to Christina, Lilac, Sag111. IEunuch, and so many others. without their help and support i would not be alive today

P.S.

i am happy with my decision. Life as a Eunuch is better than

i had hoped it would be. i have no regrets about this.

Thank's Phil,

I'm glad I can be here for you and everyone else that needs someone to talk to.

Big Hugs

to those who think it would be neet or cool to get this done.

it is not something you should do without long and deep considderation. It is not fun and the recovery can be long and painfull. (DO NOT GO INTO THIS FOR THE PAIN IT ISN'T WORTH IT)

even though i am happy with the results i do not recomend this to anyone unless they have thought about it for a long time and have considdered the concequences of such a decision

Philip1 - COOL TATTOO! I have several myself and can say that there is no such thing as just one tattoo. Once the ink gets under your skin you'll want another. Damn, COOL TATTOO!!!

a

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 03, 2004 10:26 pm fter four months of being a eunuch,

I can say my life is totally different from what it was. My temper is totally gone i no longer have thoughts of sex and i very rarely get erections.

I have had to deal with some depression and at times it was really bad. Thank God

i have friends both here at home and in the EA that have helped me deal with it.

again i will restate what i have said in past posts.

if you want to be castrated for any reason other than becoming the real you DON'T DO IT!!!

P.S.:

I still have no regrets about becoming a eunuch it has been the best thing I have ever done in my life

so we can take it then that u would not want to go back to being intact then. life is better for u now that you have been castrated

Four months two weeks

I came out as a eunuch January 5th

A letter was composed

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 03, 2004 10:26 pm , only three paragraphs took nearly three hours lots of sighs and some tears. I have started small with a friend I felt was a kindred spirit. I gave him the letter on tuesday on Wednesday I arrived at work verry nervous. He came up to me and asked pointedly if I had given the letter to anyone else at work. No I hadn't was my response. He then asked an odd question he asked if I still had a penis, this took me by supprise but I just took it all in stride. I answered his questions and cleared up some confusion as to what comes off to make a eunuch. the best part was the end of the conversation. He ended the conversation with "I'm glad you found out who you really are so few do these days and I'm happy for you."

If all the people I tell the truth to are like him I'm gonna be in heaven but I know there will be some who freak out and thats their problem, NOT mine

to end this update i'm going to add a c

philip1 (imported) wrote: Sun Dec 26, 2004 10:43 pm opy of the letter

this is the letter

This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. this is no ones fault and there is no blame to be had. My life has been one that has been dificult for myself and those arround me to deal with. There has been one thing that has been a constant in my life and that was anger. My anger has been directed mostly at myself but I have struck out at others and for that I appologise. the main reason for my anger is that I have hated who I am and what I have become.

For my whole life I have felt something was wrong with me but I was afraid to say anything about it. When I was just 5 years old I fel

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 03, 2004 10:26 pm t I was different from other boys.

I did not know how untill i was 8 then I had an Epiphony that was the discovery that I wasn't a boy inside. Again there is noone to blame for this it's just who I am. Many of you have noticed a change in my personality, a calmer more gentle Me. In order to releive some fears I am NOT gay and never was. I am however going

philip1 (imported) wrote: Wed Aug 04, 2004 3:35 pm through some changes in my life.

I am aware that I am an impulsive person this change is in no way impulsive I have been thinking about this for over 20 years and I came to this conclusion by many years of heartache and worry. By the time you read this I will ahve finished what I needed to do. In order to become who I am inside I have had a Bilateral Orchectomy. What this means is I'm a Eunuch. This doesn't change who I am the truth is I am and will always be me. This change in my life is just Me becoming who I am inside.

In conclusion I still love all of you and that will not change. I do ask that you take time and think about things before jumping to any conclusions. If you have any Questions I will do my best to answer them or provide documents that will explain things better. Please love me for who I am. I truly do love all of you and I hate to cause strife but I could think of no other way to tell you what is on my heart.

Philip

I came out as a eunuch January 5th

I have started small with a friend... I gave him the letter on tuesday

philip1 (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 03, 2004 10:26 pm on Wednesday I arrived at work verry nervous. He came up to me and asked pointedly if I had given the letter to anyone else at work. No I hadn't was my response... the best part was the end of the conversation. He ended the conversation with "I'm glad you found out who you really are

philip1 (imported) wrote: Sat Jan 08, 2005 5:59 pm so few do these days and I'm happy for you."

If all the people I tell the truth to are like him I'm gonna be in heaven but I know there will b

e some who freak out and thats their problem, NOT mine

Philip

Hello Phillip,

I can only tell you that I read your post with the same sighs and tears that you put into your letter. I felt as I read your words that you had in some way lived my life, known my pain and my longing for release from a body and gender that NEVER fit. I experienced the same sense of hopelessness you described as a child, aware that there was no way I would ever be able to live up to what my parents, teachers and peers expected of a me as a boy. At five years old I all I could do was to cry myself to sleep night after night, wanting to wake up different, not in a male body. How could I tell anyone, especially my parents, "Mommy, Daddy... I'm not a boy!"

It took a great deal of courage to tell your friends. I know, I did the same thing one year ago when I told most of my co-workers who and what I was. One or two raised their eyebrows, but most just accepted me. A few said they always knew something about me was different, but they weren't able to put their finger upon it. Now they know.

Thanks for sharing that story with us, and know that you are NOT the only traveller walking on this road. Castration was not a sexual fantasy for me; I just wanted freedom from bondage and I have it at last.

It's good to know there is another person with a similar experience.

Best,

Greg

You are very brave my friend i have told only a few about my orchy and most of them have been women they seem to understand it better then men.As my massage therapest told me today i guess us women dont feel threatened like a man dose.

Phill you and i have talked a lot about this and i am very happy for you and you are right in explaining to others it is not done for a fantasy their is to much to think of to do it for that.

Thanks for shairing this with others we love you my friend

right you are sag,I myself have told my best friend and now no longer have a best friend.I guess he couldn't handle it.His loss and mine.I want to tell the world but the crowd I hang with wouldn't even try to understand because there too macho.take care my friends.[twin]

I admire your courage in both carrying out your desires, and being forthright with everyone about them. But you knew that already. If you're happy just being yourself, everyone should be happy to know you.