Two years ago after decades of dealing with feeling sluggish with a very diminished manhood (I had to pee sitting down or make a mess on the floor and in my pants), I forced my doctor to check my t-levels. The results came back a below normal 226 and then a lower 151. So I was put on Androgel 1% and my t-levels went up to almost 400. Around November I felt my energy drop, so last week I my doctor check them again, and the results came back with the below normal 226. I wonder what my doctor is going to do about? Give me a higher dose of testosterone? I rather have my non-functioning testicles removed if he does that, I already have one of my adrenal glans with a tumor and a fatty tumor removed, One can't get testicular cancer if one doesn't have testicles!

As for T-levels and its impact on personality, I had a lot more energy when I began TRT, but when my T-levels has fallen again, and I have found that I have no energy and my span of attention was non-existent at work, and that is not good. I feel like such a fraud at work, I'm a manager at work and I can't seem to shake off a feeling of total apathy, and that's has cause me a lot problems. I've already been called to my supervisor's office about not being more active in managing my staff.

nullorchis (imported) wrote: Fri Apr 01, 2011 5:55 am I've only been a constant low T person for a short time. I did a lot of fluctuating up and down in years past as a result of various test runs. Now, following permanent reduction in testosterone production I can comment.

I use to feel intense, tense, stressed, anxious, and was quick to anger, defensive. These are now history. I am relaxed, calm, at ease, live and let live, taking it one day at a time. Even the wackos in politics and religion don't get me riled up anymore.

But I am early into the process. No one has told me I seem different. But I do feel different. Of course, we all change over time. And this change has not happened overnight, and is still probably ongoing.

If anything, I feel more in a position to have personal control over my thoughts and behavior and actions than I did before. This is very empowering. It gives me great hope for whatever is left of my life.

Riverwind (imported) wrote: Fri Apr 01, 2011 6:05 pm When I was on the castration drugs the thing I noticed was hot flashes, lots of them, one day at work it was the end of the day and we were all standing outside our cubes, when I got one of the most sever hot flashes ever, I break out in sweats so I grabbed a folder off my bosses desk and started fanning myself, and said,"damn, hot flashes, must be the change of life" everybody thought this was very funny and the hot flash passed, my boss asked me if I was OK and I said yes, 'wonder what caused that' she laughed and life went on without them even realizing that what I said was the truth.

So remember the truth is sometimes so fantastic and so wrong it will be cast out in favor of something else.

Good luck to you,

River

This thread "took a nap" before I joined the Archive last summer. From time to time, such a thread "wakes up," and is closed. This one is still open, so I shall toss in my 0.00 cents worth.

I am responding to both the comment quoted above and yesterday's Comment #30 by lance1972.

My experience informs me that what is scientifically demonstrably true can be so different from reality as defined by social consensus as to have resulted in finders of scientifically demonstrated truth which refutes socially mandated falsehoods, falsehoods which are part and parcel of the way of learning to recognize and understand newly identified, scientifically demonstrated truth. People taught, with "religious fervor" the falsehoods as though they were truths tend to act with hatred toward new scientific findings which challenge "established religious fervor.

If the prior paragraph reads like absurd nonsense, be glad, you are among the "normal people" of our contemporary world society. And be sad because the winds, they are a changing. Or not. Your choice?

I have indicated, more than once, in more than one thread, that my experience of about half of my life having been with typical male testosterone levels was of testosterone acting like a brain toxin, what I have referred to as a "brain fog."

Well, the study of biology led Barbara McClintoch to observe "jumping genes" and an article in the March, 2012, Scientific American describes how jumping genes (or somatic translocations) may account for significant contrasts in genotype-based phenotype contrasts, such as found with "identical twins" who are not genetically or phenotypically identical because of the effects of jumping genes on brain function and structure.

One or more jumping gene events sufficiently early in gestation would, in my view as a (I hope) genuinely competent biologist-bioengineer, have more than enough "capability" to have resulted in my having a normal male karotype and a brain that abhors testosterone.

Can I give an historical example of a scientific finding which resulted in its finder encountering socially originated "religious fervor" castigation? I think so. Galileo Galelei and "house arrest" and his seemingly coerced "confession."

For myself, my energy levels, in terms of practical physical work, are higher without testosterone than they were with it. Free of the "brain fog" effect I encountered with testosterone, I have done strenuous physical work, day after day, that I was (for whatever reason or reasons) unable to do while having typical testosterone levels.

Having accomplished my "testosterone-driven biological duty" (my wife's and my daughter?), I figured that dying while our daughter was very young from surgically preventable cancer would constitute an unconscionable (for me, if for no one else in an infinity of eternities) failure of fatherhood. My brother weht that way; I find his dying of cancer while having a grade-school age child was a dreadfully sad expeprience for that child.

You do not have a jumping gene condition and you need typical testosterone levels to function as well and I need low testosterone levels to function well. Hurray for both of us! You have less energy with low testosterone levels and a better experienced quality of life? Hurray!

You believe that other people have the right to define you contrary to your inner sense of self? Time for me to cry.

There is this observed biological phenomenon. It has a name. Biological Diversity. It has another name. Scientifically Demonstrable Reality. It has yet another name. Life.

I pretty much can't understand a word of what you just said, and so have no idea what you are talking about for me to agree or disagree with you. I wish you'd come down to my level and use simple words, so I could understand you. "socially originated religious fervour castigation"?? Lol. I have no idea WHAT that is, but it sounds funny. Anyway, I read 'brain fog', and I think I agree with you there.

Matthew 19:12 (imported) wrote: Thu Mar 01, 2012 7:20 am I pretty much can't understand a word of what you just said, and so have no idea what you are talking about for me to agree or disagree with you. I wish you'd come down to my level and use simple words, so I could understand you. "socially originated religious fervour castigation"?

I have no idea WHAT that us, but it sounds funny lol

Matthew 19:12 (imported) wrote: Thu Mar 01, 2012 7:20 am Anyway, I read 'brain fog', and I think I agree with you there.

People who are able to receive what I write and say, let those people receive it.

I am a surgical Eunuch with very low testosterone. I have to exercise to keep my weight in check. This is something I would prefer not to do, but turning to a fat Eunuch is not for me. I find with exercise I have retained all my mental abilities and while I have lost most of my upper body strength I do not suffer from early evening fatigue. Exercise together with a healthy diet is the key to maintaining a healthy lifestyle as a Eunuch, as it is for everybody else, but the temptation to not bother has to be overcome. I feel that as a Eunuch the motivation to exercise is greatly reduced. I have to force myself to do it.

TgEunuch (imported) wrote: Tue Feb 28, 2012 5:29 am Two years ago after decades of dealing with feeling sluggish with a very diminished manhood (I had to pee sitting down or make a mess on the floor and in my pants), I forced my doctor to check my t-levels. The results came back a below normal 226 and then a lower 151. So I was put on Androgel 1% and my t-levels went up to almost 400. Around November I felt my energy drop, so last week I my doctor check them again, and the results came back with the below normal 226. I wonder what my doctor is going to do about? Give me a higher dose of testosterone? I rather have my non-functioning testicles removed if he does that, I already have one of my adrenal glans with a tumor and a fatty tumor removed, One can't get testicular cancer if one doesn't have testicles!

As for T-levels and its impact on personality, I had a lot more energy when I began TRT, but when my T-levels has fallen again, and I have found that I have no energy and my span of attention was non-existent at work, and that is not good. I feel like such a fraud at work, I'm a manager at work and I can't seem to shake off a feeling of total apathy, and that's has cause me a lot problems. I've already been called to my supervisor's office about not being more active in managing my staff.

Excuse me, but if your testosterone level declined again after being on Androgel, has your doctor checked your prolactin levels? You may have a prolactinoma. If you do, and it is confirmed by an MRI, be sure that your doctors talk to a specialist about chemical control (Parlodel or Dostinex) before you let them cut out your pituitary gland.

Almost quoted the end of the verse right

Matthew 19:12 (KJV)

For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it , let him receive it.

Matthew 19:12 (imported) wrote: Thu Mar 01, 2012 5:25 pm Almost quoted the end of the verse right

Matthew 19:12 (KJV)

For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it , let him receive it.

I did not, and intended not to, quote the KJV.

Actually, I do my own homiletical exegesis. My textual reference was actually, "Let him accept it who can," the ending sentence of Matthew 19:12 as found in "The Bible: An American Translation," University of Chicago Press, 1935, and I chose to remove the gender bias and tweak the words so as to hint at a combination of the KJV, The Living Bible, the Jerusalem Bible, and, of course that "American Translation".

Oh... Forgot to mention... I have all 12 volumes of "The Interpreter's Bible" and all 4 volumes of "The Interpreter's Dictionary of the Bible," and both Young's and Strong's Analytical Concordances, for starters...

Jane, I read about your bullying. Do you still get suicidal? (you don't have to answer of course, and I apologise if I'm being too nosey).

It appears to me that some people do experience personality changes.