Re: Why do men want castration????
Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 1:43 am
Castration desire, a gay or a straight thing?
As a teenager, I used to play with my balls whenever I had the opportunity; they seemed to be the focus of my pleasuring myself. No masturbation session would pass without my balls being abused, mainly through squeezing or tying. From those early times I masturbate three or more times a day.
When I started having sex with girls, the desire to have my balls at the centre of sexual pleasure didnt diminish at all. In fact, as time passed, new activities such as electro, and heat became the norm. As my the women I encountered for sexual activity were generally a bit older than me, most enjoyed inflicting a level of torture on my jewels.
The introduction of third parties (either women of men) into the sexual activities by my mid twenties, led to an increase in the level of ball play. Actually, by this time I found it increasingly difficult to orgasm if the abuse was not hard enough. At this time I had never considered more than just jacking-off with another guy, and then only in the presence of a woman.
Finding that most of the women that I had been with did not play hard enough, I started visiting mens leather clubs (mainly in Berlin) to get a harder level of activity. But still only masturbating, and with no penetrative sex with other men.
By my early thirties, I started to crave the hard abuse sessions. As time passed I found that I could withstand higher levels of inflicted pain. By now I could withstand being hung by my balls, having guys standing on them, and even started banding sessions. Getting more into the leather scene, I started to penetrate other guys, finding this a great supplement to my otherwise heterosexual life.
At the end of my thirties, I noticed a severe decline in my sex drive, my craving for sex had almost gone completely. I thought it was just a mid-life crisis thing, and I didnt have any meaningful relationship at this time. After several weeks I decided that I should see my GP who examined me and took blood tests. During the examination he had squeezed my balls and had commented that there was little reaction from me. (For me too feel much during the abuse sessions, the activity would have to be very hard.) A trip to an Urologist determined that I had done some damage to my orbs. I was given various pills and potions, and even had the discussion of potential removal of one. At the time I was concerned about the possible loss of my toys.
Some months passed, and gradually my sexual appetite started to return. Occasional jacking sessions became more frequent, and eventually back to three or more a day. However, I found that my balls were no longer the centre of my orgasms. In fact with little feeling in them at all, they just seemed to be in the way. This I suppose is the point when I started to think that maybe I should have had them removed.
I felt that sexually I was changing. By this time I had no desire for women at all. I met a guy who eventually became my partner for a couple of years, and he became the centre of my live. Sex was good! But as all good things this came to an end.
Since then I have had many sexual encounters, and my sex drive is as full-on as ever. I now feel that in my mid-forties, it is time to reduce my sex drive or at least to control it, and remove what is unwanted. I shall not rush into it. Research and discussions are important.
As a teenager, I used to play with my balls whenever I had the opportunity; they seemed to be the focus of my pleasuring myself. No masturbation session would pass without my balls being abused, mainly through squeezing or tying. From those early times I masturbate three or more times a day.
When I started having sex with girls, the desire to have my balls at the centre of sexual pleasure didnt diminish at all. In fact, as time passed, new activities such as electro, and heat became the norm. As my the women I encountered for sexual activity were generally a bit older than me, most enjoyed inflicting a level of torture on my jewels.
The introduction of third parties (either women of men) into the sexual activities by my mid twenties, led to an increase in the level of ball play. Actually, by this time I found it increasingly difficult to orgasm if the abuse was not hard enough. At this time I had never considered more than just jacking-off with another guy, and then only in the presence of a woman.
Finding that most of the women that I had been with did not play hard enough, I started visiting mens leather clubs (mainly in Berlin) to get a harder level of activity. But still only masturbating, and with no penetrative sex with other men.
By my early thirties, I started to crave the hard abuse sessions. As time passed I found that I could withstand higher levels of inflicted pain. By now I could withstand being hung by my balls, having guys standing on them, and even started banding sessions. Getting more into the leather scene, I started to penetrate other guys, finding this a great supplement to my otherwise heterosexual life.
At the end of my thirties, I noticed a severe decline in my sex drive, my craving for sex had almost gone completely. I thought it was just a mid-life crisis thing, and I didnt have any meaningful relationship at this time. After several weeks I decided that I should see my GP who examined me and took blood tests. During the examination he had squeezed my balls and had commented that there was little reaction from me. (For me too feel much during the abuse sessions, the activity would have to be very hard.) A trip to an Urologist determined that I had done some damage to my orbs. I was given various pills and potions, and even had the discussion of potential removal of one. At the time I was concerned about the possible loss of my toys.
Some months passed, and gradually my sexual appetite started to return. Occasional jacking sessions became more frequent, and eventually back to three or more a day. However, I found that my balls were no longer the centre of my orgasms. In fact with little feeling in them at all, they just seemed to be in the way. This I suppose is the point when I started to think that maybe I should have had them removed.
I felt that sexually I was changing. By this time I had no desire for women at all. I met a guy who eventually became my partner for a couple of years, and he became the centre of my live. Sex was good! But as all good things this came to an end.
Since then I have had many sexual encounters, and my sex drive is as full-on as ever. I now feel that in my mid-forties, it is time to reduce my sex drive or at least to control it, and remove what is unwanted. I shall not rush into it. Research and discussions are important.
