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Re: puns

Posted: Fri Dec 06, 2019 9:00 pm
by Dave (imported)
I took this from Neil Gaiman's Tumbler

https://neil-gaiman.tumblr.com/post/189 ... arentheses

A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

A question mark walks into a bar?

Two quotation marks “Walk into” a bar.

A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to drink.

The bar was walked into by a passive voice.

Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave.

An Oxford comma walks into a bar. It orders a pint of beer, some snacks, and a shot.

A split infinitive used to often walk into a bar.

There is a bar which a preposition-ended sentence walked into.

An emphatic copula did walk into a bar.

A present subjunctive walked into a bar hoping that he be able to order a drink.

A typo walks into a bra

Re: puns

Posted: Mon Jan 13, 2020 5:41 pm
by Dave (imported)
A father walks into a toy store and asks: "Where are the Arnold Schwarzenegger Action Figures?"

And the clerk replies: "Aisle B, back."

Re: puns

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 1:34 pm
by Dave (imported)
1. Frog Parking Only - Others will be Toad

2. I checked into the Hokey Pokey Clinic and turned myself around

3. This is my Step-Ladder, I never knew my real ladder

4. I want to grow my own food but I can't find bacon seeds

5. If your car is running, I'm voting for it.

6. What happens if you get scared to death twice?

7. My wife said I never listen to her, or something like that

8. Is there ever a day when mattresses aren't on sale?

Re: puns

Posted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 5:07 pm
by Hamburger (imported)
Corona Virus found.

Wuhan they got it?