Right this way gentlemen:On our right here we have Jennifer, our poster girl for all estrogen or testosterone deficient victims.
As you can see the blue skies, the happy children, the music and folly in the air. The world seems quite jovial to us outsiders but yet Jennifer sobs.
Tour Guide: "Um, excuse me Jennifer. Why are you so upset?"
Jennifer:
Let's move on.
Ah to our left is Iris. She's not having a very good day. She overslept, the hairdrier won't work, there's a run in her stocking and the coffee pot shorted out. Watch how she tears into the couch stuffing. Wow, there goes the coffee cup across the room. Oh Iris is not happy. Guess the bloating and fatigue doesn't help her much either.
Now as we round the corner, we ask that you keep your voices down as Helena is teetering on the edge. She's threatened us several times that she has PMS and a gun and she knows how to use them both with deadly precision. :
::Let's watch as her co-worker comments on her wardrobe today.
Co-worker: Hey, Helena. You look shnazzy today.
Helena: What? You say that as if I look like a bumb the other four days out of the week.
Co-worker: :-\
Helena: Look, maybe if I made the same money as YOU I could afford to look like the resident office harlot, but I can't so I'll just have to be me and try to verbally blow our prick of a boss to get noticed around here!
Poooooor poooor Helena. Now she doesn't mean all that really, it's just hormones talking. Well, gentlemen, we must conclude this tour early. I've a headache, I'm bloated, my ankles are swollen and I need chocolate really really bad. So if you could let yourselves out - that's IF all the blood is going to your brain and not your crotch - I'd appreciate it.
From Neo:
May the Lord bless thee, for ye all have faced a horror far worse than war, famine or death. Ye have faced the medical mystery and curse that is the female hormone and all the emotional ravages it can have.
Blessed be. Peace be with you, my sons. I absolve thee.
