I've heard the import laws in Germany are really restrictive? I honestly can't imagine how hard it is to do everything that way round. If you're anything like me people already see and treat you a certain way but the minute you start doing anything they will push back. I can't imagine how hard it is to start at the deep end

All the best.

It has been some time since I looked into the matter, so my information could be outdated, but I believe that you might run into obstacles even in the US since a letter from a therapist is generally required to begin transgender HRT. However, because of my surgery, I found a couple of doctors who were willing to prescribe it to me without the letter.

Forcing someone to live as a woman for an entire year before providing E does seem a bit harsh since most transgender women are not passable prior to taking E.

I hope you enjoyed your vacation!

plix (imported) wrote: Mon Nov 26, 2012 5:39 pm It has been some time since I looked into the matter, so my information could be outdated, but I believe that you might run into obstacles even in the US since a letter from a therapist is generally required to begin transgender HRT. However, because of my surgery, I found a couple of doctors who were willing to prescribe it to me without the letter.

Forcing someone to live as a woman for an entire year before providing E does seem a bit harsh since most transgender women are not passable prior to taking E.

I hope you enjoyed your vacation!

Don't worry about before and after appearances .

I knew a 6ft 6inch macho man who changed sexes and that awkward phase only lasted a little while. Last time I saw her, she was an attractive but tall red head.

Dave (imported) wrote: Mon Nov 26, 2012 6:03 pm Don't worry about before and after appearances .

I knew a 6ft 6inch macho man who changed sexes and that awkward phase only lasted a little while. Last time I saw her, she was an attractive but tall red head.

I'm sure it's a lot harder doing it for a year without HRT?

graylayer02 (imported) wrote: Mon Nov 26, 2012 12:04 pm I still have to figure out how to obtain estrogen, since the sexual medicine arm of the university clinic requires a one year (!) "real life test" in order to obtain the stuff.

Well, if your practitioner sees the necessity to supply you with estrogen as a result of your missing testicles, then you could get them. A transgender diagnosis is not necessary. The german insurances have a special service, MDK, to review special cases, that do not fit into the scheme. Especially the fact, that you do not require (expensive) genital surgery will give you a bonus in the process.

Thanks, everyone, for that advice. That pretty much sums up where I'm at with the bureaucracy. Though, I did find out how the name-change works. Basically, my home country government has controlling authority over that...which is nice. That is a far way off but it's nice to know that there's some bureaucratic keyhole, somewhere, that I can slip through if I get that far in my (gulp) transition.

With regard to the more immediate stuff, the university clinic in my town isn't taking new appointments for the foreseeable future. The one in the nearest big city seems to have nobody there who actually takes phone calls, though apparently someone there has heard of the WPATH. So I've been making futile phone calls for the past month or so looking for ANYONE in northern Germany who even works in this field. I may have to try and get some treatment in Chicago during an upcoming trip, though ups and downs with hormone levels from sporadic treatment can be far worse than none at all.

But yeah, I feel like something has given way in my head. My inner monologue is using female (!) pronouns and a female (!) name and I'm jarred every time I look into a mirror to see that stubbly, masculine face looking back, or every time I hear that deep baritone voice. I need to find a way to do something about those things, outside of the occasional laser treatments in the nearest big city which I pay for out of pocket. That I can't do anything about this stuff in the short or medium run drives me nuts.

By the way, can we formally change the name of this thread? While I look like the most masculine guy in the world (and those who know me in person would agree), I'm not a man. I'm a really, really butch (and ugly) non-binary trans woman.

Actually in some ways it's easier starting at the deep end, since medical people know that you're serious. Also since I have an academic title and no psychological history, I'm treated somewhat more seriously too. But I wonder what will happen if I start to become visibly more feminine.

graylayer02 (imported) wrote: Sun Dec 16, 2012 2:50 pm By the way, can we formally change the name of this thread? While I look like the most masculine guy in the world (and those who know me in person would agree), I'm not a man. I'm a really, really butch (and ugly) non-binary trans woman.

I changed the name of the thread, but it won't change the title on the top of individual posts - those would have to be edited individually.

And I've seen pix of you - you're not ugly, so knock that off.

...

kristoff wrote: Sun Dec 16, 2012 4:14 pm - you're not ugly, so knock that off.

omparing pre-op and post-op pics you´d better say: more feminine, definitely!

Thanks, Kristoff, for editing the thread title. I think that it more accurately reflects things, since 'man' is totally inaccurate by this point. Funny how identities seem to change when physical reality changes.

I don't think of myself as ugly. I know better, and in fact, I've begun to like the way I look. Growing my hair out ever so slightly has made a big difference. What I meant is that my body and face are very masculine, and so even though I'm reasonably good looking (cute) as a guy, I am not confident that I'd be able to get people to gender me as female were I to transition. It's important to be patient and not to expect miracles. So yeah, I didn't mean to say that I'm ugly overall, just that I don't have any shot at looking like a woman in people's eyes.

I'm visiting my family and friends now back in the States, and I have a few free minutes before going out to run errands and stuff. Interestingly enough, I've grown very close to my sister, and she's the only person I have known from before this year who genders me correctly and in a consistent way. It's an immensely wonderful thing to have her on my side, since my parents are naturally a bit less enthusiastic about my whole project. That said, I've heard of far worse.

I just found out that certain formerly-reliable places to get hormones have been shut down, which bugs me to no end. I have to keep chipping away at the situation in Germany despite there being no obvious way to find help there (this includes even finding someone to talk with). Plan A was to ask an endocrinologist for hormones. His response has launched me into Plan B, which is to try somehow to find a gatekeeper to initiate the whole hoop-jumping process. Such people are very rare in that country. Plan C was to access a certain formerly-reliable place which no longer can be accessed in the United States. Plan D is to go through the informed consent process in the United States, which is somewhat complicated, time-consuming, and expensive if you do not live in that country. There is a Plan E as well, which involves yet more travel.

Meanwhile, the bone loss continues unabated.

Yman, what does an 'op' have to do with the current situation? That isn't an issue for me, though there are things I might want to do if I take things further. I don't understand the fascination with pre-transition vs. post-transition pics, except to show that hormones and presentation can have a big effect on some people. At the end of the day, looks matter to the extent that you get gendered the way you want to, but beyond that, it's a complete mistake to think that they are the yardstick by which the success of a transition is measured. The right yardstick is happiness.