soontobe (imported) wrote: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:24 pm Well went to my Dr. and she freaked out, sent me for a ultrasound and the radiologist freaked out, and sent me to a specialist and he said nothing looks odd, however my testicles are lumpy, hard, and shrunken. Damn Quack!!! I get my T results Monday morning so we will see, I injected 2 ml each Saturday morning with no problems or pain. Loving the calm feelings.

Some "Specialist". I hope they decide to remove your testicles, if that's what you were wanting. That specialist might as well had put a Band-Aid on a broken leg and discharged the patient.

So, how were the test results?

On a side note, I've not been very active lately, still haven't gotten around to seeing a doctor (kinda dealing with some other stresses atm) I'm still around, just haven't been very active is all.

I have not posted anything recently since there is not much new to post.

As an unofficial "graduate" of Everclear injections into my testicles, I can confirm that they are hard, feel no pain, shrunken, and produce very little or no testosterone. This took 8 sessions over 2 1/2 months, averaging from 1.5 to 2.5 cc injected per session. I have stopped injections, and am now taking 1/3 a standard dose (down from an original full dose) of testosterone daily to hopefully avoid some of the negative consequences of having very low or no testosterone.

I went through a variety of emotions, anxieties, and mixed feelings during the process. I can not explain why during my entire life I wanted to be castrated. Lacking that possibility, alcohol injections seemed risky, but a possible alternative. Doing something like this that is officially untested, undocumented, dangerous, risky, etc. is beyond a doubt dumb, stupid, risky; but I was driven and could not do otherwise.

Thankfully the stress and risk part is over. The goal has been achieved. Nevertheless I will again say to others, think twice, three times, five times before doing this. Just because it has been successful for me, or for others, does not mean you will have a safe experience. One must at all times use clinical sterile methods, and even then, injecting into the wrong spot could be a disaster. It is uncharted territory. It really is not worth the risk, but I could not convince myself otherwise. I lucked out. If you choose to proceed I hope you luck out too.

I would still like to be castrated if that ever becomes possible, but for now, without testosterone driving me to insanity, I no longer have the desperate craving to be castrated. Not having that nagging obsession is a relief.

I feel noticeably more emotional than usual today, and my sentimentality seems to be slowly increasing.

Test results are back "T" count is at 300 which she says is low mid range.

She is pissed at the specialist and want a second opinion!!

I injected last night 2 ML and my left testicle is super swollen and sore I guess I wasn't ready for a injection LOL. Thank god for ice packs!!

soontobe (imported) wrote: Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:24 pm Well went to my Dr. and she freaked out, sent me for a ultrasound and the radiologist freaked out, and sent me to a specialist and he said nothing looks odd, however my testicles are lumpy, hard, and shrunken. Damn Quack!!! I get my T results Monday morning so we will see, I injected 2 ml each Saturday morning with no problems or pain. Loving the calm feelings.

So, did you tell them what you did? Or just acting all innocent and letting them decide that there is a problem?

I always like the ultrasound technicians. For some reason they are usually women. they start doing the ultrasound (which is usually kind of exciting to a pervert like me), then they start to frown, then take lots of pictures, then call over their supervisor, etc. They usually say that they've never seen anything like it and are usually pretty perplexed. I think I've gone through it three times, and always the same funny situation where they grow increasingly concerned.

One thing to mention if you did not tell them, is that if you keep injecting the ultrasounds will give you away. That happened with me where they kept finding new/different "hypoechoic" areas, and it became obvious that it wasn't an organic problem but rather new injury. Usually I do tell the doctors about my self-harm, with psychiatrist backing me up. But occasionally I'll try a new doctor and play innocent to see if they might lead to conclusion they need to be removed.

I feel a bit weaker and tired than usual. I'm also a bit hot at times when the ambient temperature, my clothing, and my activity doesn't give me the reason to be hot. Could just be excitement or anxiety. Then again, it may be hot flashes. It was also more difficult for me to masturbate last night and my breasts have been quite sore today, especially my left breast. Anymore proof, and I'd think that my adrenal glands are finally giving up on trying to raise the testosterone in me. Maybe I'm just exaggerating. I don't know. Oh well. I'm doing another blood test tomorrow after the ultrasound appointment.

Marcy Thomas (imported) wrote: Thu Apr 21, 2011 1:58 pm I feel a bit weaker and tired than usual. I'm also a bit hot at times when the ambient temperature, my clothing, and my activity doesn't give me the reason to be hot. Could just be excitement or anxiety. Then again, it may be hot flashes. It was also more difficult for me to masturbate last night and my breasts have been quite sore today, especially my left breast. Anymore proof, and I'd think that my adrenal glands are finally giving up on trying to raise the testosterone in me. Maybe I'm just exaggerating. I don't know. Oh well. I'm doing another blood test tomorrow after the ultrasound appointment.

Try to not over think or dwell on all of this. Give yourself an opportunity to be active, live, engage in activities you like doing, be with people you like to be with, engage in conversations about anything but your quest or feelings. Sometimes by thinking about oneself too much we are too focused on ME, MYSELF, and I and trick ourselves into deception. Just for awhile, concentrate on NOT thinking about how you feel, or what you are feeling, and live within the external environment. With practice it might become a new habit that will be a positive factor in the development of the new you.

nullorchis (imported) wrote: Fri Apr 22, 2011 5:17 am Try to not over think or dwell on all of this. Give yourself an opportunity to be active, live, engage in activities you like doing, be with people you like to be with, engage in conversations about anything but your quest or feelings. Sometimes by thinking about oneself too much we are too focused on ME, MYSELF, and I and trick ourselves into deception. Just for awhile, concentrate on NOT thinking about how you feel, or what you are feeling, and live within the external environment. With practice it might become a new habit that will be a positive factor in the development of the new you.

Hi Nullorchis, I appreciate your advice. However, it's not right to abruptly pass judgement upon someone, especially when you know only a minute bit of who they are, what they've been through, and what they have done for others. I post updates of my progress for others to learn from it and to get more info. After all, isn't this thread about sharing your experiences with others?

SplitDik (imported) wrote: Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:09 pm So, did you tell them what you did? Or just acting all innocent and letting them decide that there is a problem?

I always like the ultrasound technicians. For some reason they are usually women. they start doing the ultrasound (which is usually kind of exciting to a pervert like me), then they start to frown, then take lots of pictures, then call over their supervisor, etc. They usually say that they've never seen anything like it and are usually pretty perplexed. I think I've gone through it three times, and always the same funny situation where they grow increasingly concerned.

One thing to mention if you did not tell them, is that if you keep injecting the ultrasounds will give you away. That happened with me where they kept finding new/different "hypoechoic" areas, and it became obvious that it wasn't an organic problem but rather new injury. Usually I do tell the doctors about my self-harm, with psychiatrist backing me up. But occasionally I'll try a new doctor and play innocent to see if they might lead to conclusion they need to be removed.

Thanks for the info, No I did not inform them of my plans to be a eunuch, I am a prominent business man so I just let them discover the damaged tissue and wait for them to offer a solution. The urologist was more concerned with my penile piercing than my lumpy nuts.