I have a sister a year younger than I am. Once, when a younger cousin, a boy, was spending the night, and we were home alone, we decided to show each other what we had, each of us coming into the room while the others sat on the floor. Wrapped only in a towel, I stood in front of them, and as if on a stage, I took the towel off and showed them what I had. My sister and cousin followed in turn.

I tried to get them to do it another time a couple of years later when I was thirteen. My sister agreed, but after I'd done my strip tease, my cousin refused to go through with it, so my sister backed out. She told me, after she'd seen me naked, "I have more hair than you."

Although I didn't get to see hers, I'd shaved my pubes a few weeks before, and they hadn't fully grown out. I had a full growth by then, actually.

I remember my first wet dream, which happened before I began masturbating. In it, I was sitting in class at school clad only in my white briefs, identical to the ones I ejaculated into that night. The emotion accompanying the dream was embarrassment. Everyone was looking at me. I've had the same -- or similar -- dream since, but not for years. I can't remember being naked in any of them. In each I had on nothing but white briefs, and in each I was the only one in class so clad; they were all fully dressed; and everyone stared at me.

But, I graduated from UC San Diego, which is on the bluffs above Black's Beach, a nude beach. After being seen naked by thousands, being caught naked had no such hold on my psyche.

FianceeUvBigGuy (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:04 am What's all this fuss about Sax and Violins? Don't you like music?

Oh....SEX and VIOLENCE?

Never mind.

Yolanda The Fine Arts Editor

Sax and Violins...

We are just ' G stringing you along ' Saxy, huh?

ChemistryKid (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 3:12 am That's an interesting thought, but I don't think I associate sex with guilt. If I did then I would probably associate all sex with penectomy or castration, and I wouldn't have to fantasize about rape to make it satisfying.

Not necessarily. If you want to punish, it's rape. If you want to be punished, it's penectomy or castration. It is a violent form of subconscious justice, either way.

ChemistryKid (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 3:12 am It is more like I associate rape with punishment, and that surely is evident in the stories that I've written. But I think that's a normal association. Isn't it?

No, not really. It is not about punishment regarding sex. It is about power and control over a victim. Penectomy and castration is about control over yourself or the threat which brings about control, in you or perhaps in another male.

You have to get over the Punishment-Guilt thing before it is satisfying and recognize that sex is normal but that violence in sex is not, not for ANY reason.

A-1 (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 10:27 pm It is not about punishment regarding sex. It is about power and control over a victim. Penectomy and castration is about control over yourself or the threat which brings about control, in you or perhaps in another male.

Wow, you are so right! I had never thought of it that way. My fantasies involving penectomy, castration, and rape, all three of them, come from the same source. They are all about violence and sex...I am not yet convinced that this is connected to guilt and sex, but perhaps.

Now that this is mentioned, I have also had a similar fantasy of a different sort. I imagine some sort of royal family, a king and queen and their children, all fighting over power. The rules say that you cannot rule the kingdom if you cannot produce an heir to the throne, not even if you have already produced several heirs. The reason for the rule becomes clear when the princes and princesses start fighting each other for power, and the next in line for power gets his balls cut off. You never know when you'll need a new heir.

My point is that this fantasy does not just involve castration and penectomy, it also involves a sort of female castration. I imagine that the female victims in this struggle would suffer a single knife wound to the belly, destroying their reproductive power, sex drive, and maybe even vagina (but otherwise nonfatal, so that they can suffer...I don't know if that's even possible, but fantasies rarely are.)

A-1 (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 10:27 pm You have to get over the Punishment-Guilt thing before it is satisfying and recognize that sex is normal but that violence in sex is not, not for ANY reason.

Well, that's not so insightful! I think I already knew that violence in sex is not normal. Somehow my parents managed to survive creating me, and I don't seriously think my girlfriend is ever going to attack me. Does anyone actually think that violence is expected in sex?

ChemistryKid (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 2:29 pm That's a good one! I fantasize about that too. I included a little bit of that in Fence.

Also, that's a lot easier to make happen then you would think! I've actually done it. Ever had a sister? When I was young and really really excited about my penis, I started taking showers without locking the door, just creating the possibility that my sister might come in on me while I was naked.

I didn't flash her; I just created a situation where the possibility existed of her catching me naked. How'd that do for fulfilling your fantasies? I bet it would work with any room mate.

...

Unfortunately, I never had a sister so that kind of opportunity never existed for me.

In adult life, there were a few occasions when I could have made it possible for my mother-in-law to see me naked, but I never could quite get up the nerve to do it.

Slammr (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 1:05 pm Once at a pool party I was climbing up the ladder out of the pool when a girl I'd been flirting with in the pool grabbed my swim suit, pulling it down to my knees. It wasn't an accident. She did it deliberately. Everyone got a good look; but being an exhibitionist at heart, it didn't bother me. Hell, in college, I would go into the coed sauna naked, even if I were the only one naked in it. Of course, I wasn't the only guy that did. I probably wouldn't have had the nerve to do it, had I not seen others do it first. I was never into flashing.

I had a similar experience at a pool party once. Both myself and my best friend were wearing rather tight fitting swim suits (his was a Speedo). I got grabbed by one of the girls although she didn't pull my trunks down or anything. Later on that same night, my friend and I were dressed and fooling around with an Apple II computer (this was a long time ago) in one of the bedrooms of the house, when this same girl walked in and said to me, "I've never seen a man...." I looked at her with interest and so did my buddy. "Uh... do you mean you want to see every part of a man?" She nodded affirmatively. "I just turned 18 and I've only seen a few pictures...."

Both of us were ready to help her out, but the house was full of people and there was no way to lock the door to the room, so we finally decided not to do it on the spot. She was really insistant, but as luck would have it, neither my friend nor I had enough money for a motel room. I was newly married and my friend still lived with his parents so there was no way we could take her to one of our houses. What a lost opportunity.

T

Kangan (imported) wrote: Tue Feb 06, 2007 2:14 pm his same girl walked in and said to me, "I've never seen a man...." I looked at her with interest and so did my buddy. "Uh... do you mean you want to see every part of a man?" She nodded affirmatively. "I just turned 18 and I've only seen a few pictures...."

Both of us were ready to help her out, but the house was full of people and there was no way to lock the door to the room, so we finally decided not to do it on the spot. She was really insistant, but as luck would have it, neither my friend nor I had enough money for a motel room. I was newly married and my friend still lived with his parents so there was no way we could take her to one of our houses. What a lost opportunity.

Wow, that's a really strange story! What sort of house has no private places at all? Even if the bathrooms do not lock, I'm sure they would have been safe enough places to do the job. To lose an opportunity like that over the lack of a single private little spot is such a waste.

You could have even gone behind the bushes; you didn't need a motel room. If you were willing to go to a motel except for a lack of money, then surely surely there must have been some sort of privacy available within the same distance, a little bit of wilderness, or a large rock to hide behind.

Perhaps you didn't really have the nerve for that, either?

ChemistryKid (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 05, 2007 11:41 pm Wow, you are so right! I had never thought of it that way. My fantasies involving penectomy, castration, and rape, all three of them, come from the same source. They are all about violence and sex...I am not yet convinced that this is connected to guilt and sex, but perhaps.

Now that this is mentioned, I have also had a similar fantasy of a different sort. I imagine some sort of royal family, a king and queen and their children, all fighting over power. The rules say that you cannot rule the kingdom if you cannot produce an heir to the throne, not even if you have already produced several heirs. The reason for the rule becomes clear when the princes and princesses start fighting each other for power, and the next in line for power gets his balls cut off. You never know when you'll need a new heir.

My point is that this fantasy does not just involve castration and penectomy, it also involves a sort of female castration. I imagine that the female victims in this struggle would suffer a single knife wound to the belly, destroying their reproductive power, sex drive, and maybe even vagina (but otherwise nonfatal, so that they can suffer...I don't know if that's even possible, but fantasies rarely are.)

Well, that's not so insightful! I think I already knew that violence in sex is not normal. Somehow my parents managed to survive creating me, and I don't seriously think my girlfriend is ever going to attack me. Does anyone actually think that violence is expected in sex?

They are called Masochists. Yes, they do exist, and yes, the violence seems to intensify their orgasms.

For a Sadist, the violence is also stimulating, but more than that, the control issue is an underlying theme.

For a trip into this world through fiction (but maybe not, at least not completely) I recommend that you read "The Story of O" by Pauline Reage

Of course, not all bondage and submission scenarios are ones that are recognized as such.

Witness Howard Stern tickling Carmen Electra. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QY_s41yFh40)

Perception of sexuality is not always detected. Sometimes sexual connotations are apparent, and sometimes they are not and sometimes they exist only in the eyes of the 3rd party witness. Some see tickling as an innocent activity. It is sometimes 'foreplay', but is it always? Sometimes even nudity has NO sexual connotations. This is a stretch for most people, however. You Mileage may vary with this, also.

You decide.

A-1 (imported) wrote: Tue Feb 06, 2007 10:36 pm They are called Masochists. Yes, they do exist, and yes, the violence seems to intensify their orgasms.

For a Sadist, the violence is also stimulating, but more than that, the control issue is an underlying theme.

Despite the nature of my fantasies, I don't think that I am a sadist or even a masochist. It is one thing to fantasize about something and another thing to actually do it, and in my experience the fantasy of a thing can have the exact opposite emotional effect as the reality of that same thing. The pain, the blood, and the danger of death would be a serious inhibition to my enjoying such a thing in reality.

Even as I say that I find it hard to entirely believe, though. The thought of actually risking my penis in some sort of dangerous game or fight is just so very exciting. I cannot say for sure that I would avoid such a thing even if it were offered to me in reality and not mere fantasy. The actual loss would be horrible in reality, but the danger would be fantastic in reality.

The thought that someone might sneak up behind me during sex and grab my balls from behind is extremely exciting. I like to think about how vulnerable they are, that anyone could reach between my legs from behind, where I cannot see it coming, and then do anything to my balls.

I suppose I love the possibility in reality, but I only love the consequences in fantasy.