the big after surgery test with family

[dee2essohkay (imported)]

it keeps reverberating in my head, the questions, why are people concerned with keeping castration a secret? is “the need to know” and it not being a need the only consideration?

ok they call those thing private parts but i think that since so many have moved away from that privacy, secrecy might not be necessary. i wonder, if the idea of “no one needs to know” might be keeping the eunuch community out of the loop when it comes to human rights. WPATH is helping, but is that the only mechanism needed? do we only need healthcare and safe surgery or do we need acceptance in all parts of society? acceptance i think should be our goal.

maybe that suggested “nude entrance” is actually the way to go or at least public talk about it. secrecy tends to make something seem somehow unsavory. i don’t think my castration is unsavory. i think i needed it because other courses of action did not help me.

i don’t feel punished. i don’t feel less a person. i do feel more able now - than ever- to think without the constant heckling by my live in “demon” (which i believe is actually the effect of testosterone on damaged parts of my ego). mental healthcare did not stop it. i stopped it through castration.

had i been brought up in a healthy nurturing family environment and not one with abuse i may have been different and i might have been well adjusted and utilizing my sex in a more harmonious way, but that didn’t happen. am i then condemned to living in secrecy? must i feel shame for what i’ve done to myself or be proud of what i’ve done for myself?

maybe being open about this actually is the way to go.

[Valery_V (imported)]

I understand you and fully share your views.

Besides, I'm somewhat of an exhibitionist.

At the request of friends I readily uploaded my intimate photos in December, 2020 to EA Personals website .

I am sure that you will successfully pass "big after surgery test with family", of course, when your loved ones want it.

[Losethem (imported)]

it keeps reverberating in my head, the questions, why are people concerned with keeping castration a secret? is

“the need to know”

and it not being a need the only consideration?

It's not so much keeping it a secret, as it is not finding it necessary to tell everyone I know.

[AcordingIP (imported)]

Please, in the fullness of wishing you every success, seek help for depression. It catches up. It’s the unknown disease,

[dee2essohkay (imported)]

Please, in the fullness of wishing you every success, seek help for depression. It catches up. It’s the unknown disease,

thank you. I have been in therapy for several years now. I do not believe my issue is depression. but I am not avoiding help. I am continuing with my present therapist while also trying to find a new therapist trained and experienced in addressing my real issues which are childhood sexual abuse, dissociation disorder and most importantly, all the things I am now confronted with in making my efforts to live my trans eunuch genderality.

[4everLimp (imported)]

The only person I have ever told is my doctor and even then I made up a reason as to why I had to have an orchiectomy. I would have to do some explaining to any potential sexual partner if one ever came along. But even in that case I doubt that I would tell them the whole truth or that I willingly did this to myself.

[dee2essohkay (imported)]

The only person I have ever told is my doctor and even then I made up a reason as to why I had to have an orchiectomy. I would have to do some explaining to any potential sexual partner if one ever came along. But even in that case I doubt that I would tell them the whole truth or that I willingly did this to myself.

I understand this and I do believe I will have difficulty when I do talk about it. but I also feel that being castrated is my identity. even before I openly acknowledged it I believe I was feeling that true me is without sex. I do want intimacy, but I think sex is an unnecessary thing for me. I feel that receiving the orchi is accomplishment that I need to share. if there are unknown underlying reasons for this, I will one day find out. I still think it is all about being the real me.

[keyman419 (imported)]

I guess my reasons for needing to share this information is because we all come from the same dysfunctional family where we were all exposed to ongoing sexual abuse and parental narcissistic behavior. I see them as being my allies and we should all be mutual supporters

The truth is that not all family members are "mutual supporters" of our decisions. I also don't see the need to disclose this information unless there is some untold reason for trying to 'prove something' to them, which actually raises a red flag. I think you may be setting yourself up for potential disappointment if not everyone fully supports your decision. It really doesn't seem as though they really need to know this information.

The reasons I was nullified were all very personal and while I'm open about some things with certain people, for most others they have no business knowing what I've done to my body.

[Valery_V (imported)]

The truth is that not all family members are "mutual supporters" of our decisions. I also don't see the need to disclose this information unless there is some untold reason for trying to 'prove something' to them, which actually raises a red flag. I think you may be setting yourself up for potential disappointment if not everyone fully supports your decision. It really doesn't seem as though they really need to know this information.

The reasons I was nullified were all very personal and while I'm open about some things with certain people, for most others they have no business knowing what I've done to my body.

I completely agree.

It is completely useless to prove and explain your motives to everyone. It has to be felt...

The vast majority of people will not be able to understand you.

[dee2essohkay (imported)]

I may want to shock them or passively aggress upon them. maybe somehow I hold them responsible. well it's this if not quite the opposite. that I may actually liberate them and make them feel like they can touch a bit of happiness finally. we all do come from the same place my siblings and me.