Keeping Sane? How Are You?

[Arab Nights (imported)]

I'm in an area of Canada with very low rates (whole province has less than 25 cases, no hospitalization), but still, we are under 'state of emergency' but with none of the provisions enacted yet.

I was just in Toronto for a conference. Turns out we snuck in just under the wire. The news a couple of days after return was some guy from Sudbury tested positive and I had talked to several folks from Sudbury. While geographical isolation in these times feels good, I don't think it is a guarantee. I remember years ago reading about scientists unearthing bodies from a Norwegian island near the North Pole looking for DNA of the Spanish Flu virus of 1918. That flu circled the earth in a year and even reached out to a freeze-your-balls-off Norwegian island. I doubt geography can save us. Better to practice good health and keep up on spiritual values just in case.

Great list TopMan!

[rogerwpbfl (imported)]

Rog,

I'd like a detailed list, please?

SMH and knowing you'll never fess up to all the "new things" you're doing "to yourself", I've decided to push the button in my brain that is labeled "Creative Things to do with Your Penis".

1. Dip it in ice-cold salted water for 30 minutes to see what a bottle of white wine goes through during rapid cooling.

2. Do that again, because if 30 minutes felt that numb, then 45 minutes would feel better.

3. Decide never to that again after reading up on the effects of frostbite.

4. Roll one die (the singular form of dice) and multiply the number by 10. Band Ranger for that many minutes.

5. Decide that was interesting but, lacked the thrill of long term banding (read that as Ranger loves Danger).

6. Rolled three dice and multiply the number by ten and that's the number of minutes Ranger gets banded.

7. Seriously having enjoyed number six, Ranger demands you do it again. When three sixes were rolled Ranger stood up to see what the numbers were.

8. 180 minutes later Ranger has passed out from lack of oxygen and Roger realized that not being able to cum makes a good night's sleep more difficult.

9. Two days later, Ranger is demanding more danger and Rog is more interested in a face to face webcam session with some girl he finds online.

10. She promised not to take any screen captures and post them online. But, that resulted in another restless night of sleep wondering if she was catfishing Ranger.

11. Bored, Rog reads an article on the history of the Internet and finds that one of the very first websites was LPSG, the large penis support group. Ranger finds the site boring and Rog hates it when Ranger gets bored and refuses to play.

12. Determined to get a good night of sleep, Rog beats Ranger as if he owes him money and the resulting waterfall of jizz coats the headboard, Rog's hair, and chest and the dripples out for the next hour as Rog sleeps like a baby.

13. Ranger finds an application online to become a porn actor for Tushy and fills it out. Roger isn't sure but makes the audition vid anyway and Rager mails it in.

14. With Roger's stunning good looks and movie star smile that could melt any MILF's heart combined with Ranger's massive personality, the studio calls back the next day to arrange for an in-person audition.

15. Although Ranger has never been so excited, Roger won't do the audition without his pet monkey on his shoulder and the entire idea is nixed.

16. Currently, Ranger is having a sulk and Roger is looking through the collection of hair ties various women have left on Ranger over the years and pondering if he should arrange them in a frame or put them back in his sock drawer next to his fleshlight.

17. ?

So? How close did I come to the "new things" you are "doing to yourself"?

I just woke up and read this. What's this about ice salt water? Me and Ranger are now interested and great list love all the activities you came up with for us to try

[Paolo]

Been watching Tubitv.com , which is a free site with commercials. They aren't bad, as far as selection and frequency of ads. I watched the old "Deathstalker" movie from the 80's the other day, with only 1 commercial. "Road to Perdition" had 2. Whoever sets up the ads has fun, too, as the ads tend to blend right in with the dialog. Watched a Star Trek TNG movie too, and Picard asked, "Number One, ..." and then the ad cut in: "Do you suffer from painful hemorrhoids?" I nearly choked!

So far, I'm keeping sane, although Grandpa (whom I refer to as Typhoid Mary now) refused to stay home. He hit 5 places this morning, and said the stores are empty. Then again, if he doesn't get ONE thing he wants, he throws a fit. He's 92. Hasn't even had the flu in 40 years, either.

From what I have seen, though, as I was out Tuesday to bring my work PC home, the stores are fairly depleted. Gas is $1.89, though. Whooppee!

[The Maintaner (imported)]

Been watching Tubitv.com , which is a free site with commercials. They aren't bad, as far as selection and frequency of ads. I watched the old "Deathstalker" movie from the 80's the other day, with only 1 commercial. "Road to Perdition" had 2. Whoever sets up the ads has fun, too, as the ads tend to blend right in with the dialog. Watched a Star Trek TNG movie too, and Picard asked, "Number One, ..." and then the ad cut in: "Do you suffer from painful hemorrhoids?" I nearly choked!

So far, I'm keeping sane, although Grandpa (whom I refer to as Typhoid Mary now) refused to stay home. He hit 5 places this morning, and said the stores are empty. Then again, if he doesn't get ONE thing he wants, he throws a fit. He's 92. Hasn't even had the flu in 40 years, either.

From what I have seen, though, as I was out Tuesday to bring my work PC home, the stores are fairly depleted. Gas is $1.89, though. Whooppee!

:-\The sad part my gas tank is full and I have no were to go.

[TopManFL (imported)]

I just woke up and read this. What's this about ice salt water? Me and Ranger are now interested and great list love all the activities you came up with for us to try

Saltwater transfers heat faster than plain water. So, to rapidly cool a bottle of wine, restaurants will put salt in with the ice water they use to chill white wine.

Ranger really does like danger. Since the drug stores are still open, you could wander down first-aid section and see if there are any new and interesting ways to tightly wrap up a ten-inch penis. I'm thinking some of that new tape the athletes are putting on strained muscles.

[Paolo]

So I got paid this past week, which was a surprise, as we're pretty much out of business with the schools closed.

I went to the local Wal-Mart to get the usual things. Then the news said that the governor was ordering a lockdown on nonessential travel.

As Jeff Foxworthy once said, "It was pandelerium!"

However, they had plenty of pet food.

They are not buying the dry black beans. All others are gone, as is the rice. I wonder if they know how to cook it?

Swiss cheese. Do they think they're buying a hole?

Bush's Best canned beans. Seriously, why not Bush?

Lunchmeat, etc., - gone. All but for the turkey smoked sausage. Why?

Of course, the gluten free and vegan and higher priced specialty stuff is not selling yet.

Neither is the sugar-free or no sugar added stuff. I found stuff that I didn't even know they carried, like no sugar canned apple pie filling. This is food that I normally buy elsewhere and have to look for! Plenty of it.

The garden center is deserted.

Bread is gone. Soda is not. Fruit and vegetable juices are gone, too. All the staples are gone, in fact.

Toothpaste? Got plenty of that. Shampoo, etc., not selling. Hand soap is out. Dish soap is stocked. As Madge once said on TV in the 70's, "You're soaking in it! It's Palmolive!"

And beer and wine? Fine. Have at it!

I can't wait to see what the next week is going to bring!

[Arab Nights (imported)]

Went to store this morning. From 6-7 reserved for +60 or whippersnappers accompanied by a "mature" hoarder. The line at opening was only about 100 feet long. Actually were paper products with limit one package tp and one towel per customer. No brown eggs, but lots of white eggs. No cheaper meats, but lots of steaks. I got the last two saranwraps. They were busy as hell restocking while us mature locust were swarming.

[ka.dick. (imported)]

I kinda feel like writing something again but I still don't have the patience.

Funny thing, for a few years now I've been thinking of a storyline that involves a global pandemic, and my "plan" was to write multiple stories from several perspectives - personal accounts of people directly affected, news casts, celebrities doing calls to actions, Wikipedia entries and so on. It's quite funny how much what's going on now irl resembles what I've had in my mind.

Even the basic premise, where it all starts innocently in basically the 3rd world and eventually there's a strong global push for mass-producing something (irl it's tests and masks, in my premise it was something else) is very similar.

Granted, I guess all pandemic stories follow this structure, nevertheless...

[TopManFL (imported)]

I have decided to take this time at home to learn to play with my yoyo. I still have it from when I was a kid.

When I was a kid I was terrible at yoyo. Every weekend the the yoyo guy would come to the parking lot of our local elementary school and set up his van. Kids would all flock to watch him show us how easy it was to use use the yoyo. So as not to piss off the local stores, he didn't actually sell yoyos, he just demonstrated how to do tricks.

In retrospect, that sounds kind creepy. But, it was advertised on the TV machine during the Skipper Chuck show. Skipper Chuck was a local kids TV show and it was sponsored by Borden's Dairy. Although the actor that played Skipper Chuck was young, handsome and gay as a goose, now that I think about it, that show was really creepy.

It's kind of amazing any of us made it out of childhood.

So, I've been on the YouTube watching as many videos as I can on how to yoyo.

I got side tracked for a small bit of time watching old clips of the Skipper Chuck show but, that is another story.

I still have my bestest yoyo which was made from plastic and has sparkles in it. I also have some old yellow wooden yoyo and I don't remember where that came from.

Having figured out what to do while I'm bored out of my mind having to stay inside, I have one question. Does anyone know how to board up a broken glass window? It seems plastic yoyos last a very long time. However, yoyo strings are not as durable and the yoyo flew out exactly the way the guy on the youtube machine said then pow the string broke and in a flying yoyo versus window contest the yoyo actually lost and bounced back at me and the cat. The cat was not amused and jumped away knocking over the lamp which missed the window. It did not, however, miss the plant on the window which is now outside the window along with the pieces of the broken window.

The good news is that now I'm not bored, I'm pissed.

[Dave (imported)]

I would recommend this for a great laugh. Our member "Jesus" sent it to me and I'm spreading it as far as I can...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1OCZRann8w

PS - listen for the "TP" song from CATS