I've always handled this with if it's a question I'm uncomfortable with, I send them back to ask mom and dad. You can never go wrong sending a kid back to their parent with a touchy question unanswered.

alexsmith (imported) wrote: Sat Jun 30, 2018 3:24 pm I completely agree with you, especially with your last point. Age of consent laws are totally arbitrary and often tyrannical. But try telling that to most people in a country like America; they will hang you!

Very true, and they differ greatly from country to country, with the U.S. having among the highest. The reason it's so high in the U.S. has to do with the country's background with puritanical authoritarianism. Unfortunately it's become so deeply ingrained in the American psyche such that even many self-professed atheists (to say nothing of the actual fanatics!) will defend religious rules like the arbitrarily-high consent and drinking ages, and think that suggesting 21 for various things like alcohol, drugs, and firearms (we may need gun control, but equally applied and not based on age discrimination!) is somehow acceptable in a country that gives so much lip service to "freedom." As though it's anything less than tyranny to deny basic human rights to any citizen after they're capable of independent thought. And all this from a society which has the audacity to judge so-called "third world" countries for their own human rights abuses, almost as though berating others is a distraction so they don't have to look at their own discriminatory policies critically.

That a country can allow and even promote a culture in which movies and video games made for young people depict the graphic slaughter of other people to steal their cars and the few dollars in their wallets, and yet consider a film showing a female nipple to be "pornographic" and "unacceptable," will continue to flabbergast and appall me in equal measure. There's a very good reason Europeans tend to look down on us, and it's not because we actually possess the free and open society we claim to.

But I'm derailing the topic, so I'll close with this: Depending on the type of parents, it can be a good idea to refer touchy questions back to them, especially simple things like "the talk," but at some point I believe it does become a moral imperative to provide an answer oneself. This is especially the case if you know the parents and how they'll react. Just to give an example, if a boy confides to me that he's gay or transgender, and I know his parents are going to send him off to some "camp" to "cure" him of his "disease," I'm going to say my peace on the matter and recommend he keep that from them and speak to me or an equally-liberal individual (teacher or school counselor, perhaps) if he wants advice or to get something off his chest. There's a reason why, in Europe and more liberal states, certain aspects a young person's upbringing and education are being taken out of the parents' hands.

I have been the authority on this matter to many of the boys here. All five of "mine", the almost-stepson long before, and his friends, and the main fives' friends. In the case of friends, I require not only verbal parental consent, but also a signed form. I waive the signed for in the case of the boys being dropped off at nephew's home by their parents! Apparently, the boy told his friend that we were having "the talk." Suddenly, three of them show up unannounced!

Now, imagine my shock when I find out that the "runt" of this litter wants to know about gay sex, and that his friend B. wants to try it with him, although he declares that he is totally straight. Well, let's give him 95%, OK? But I had to swear that I would never tell their parents about THAT part of the talk! Then it's off to buy a carton of condoms. Another dirty secret. As it turned out, they'd already tried anal with Mr. 95 attempting to top Runt, and failing. I had to makes sketches. It wasn't that good... so Runt gets online and goes to X-Tube... I nearly fainted.

But I digress.

Seriously, I would NEVER discuss sexual issues without at least getting verbal consent from the parents/guardian in person, and/or the signed form if they didn't drop him off at the house. I do prefer to expect the students, though!

However, once consent is given, I don't hold any data back.

And yes, as Jesus A. knows, and is published in one paper, I had to have the castration talk with Nephew2 and his best buddy, L., who was routinely threatened with elastration by his mother. Yes, he was a farm boy.

One guy in my cite conversated with 7 years old girl about sex... State closed him to prison for ten years! Paedophilia!

Can you imagine if all the adults who talked to us growing up about sex and taught all of us what we know were this afraid to say anything to us and refused to answer our questions or to talk about sex in front of us.

How would any of us have known anything but the time we turned 18. I d have sired dozens of unwanted kids if I was left uninformed and stupid about sex from age 9 to age 18. Plus I d have caught every STD by then too.

That s not protecting kids, its leaving them to learn everything in the worst and most damaging and irreversable ways possible. That s child cruelty to stay ignorant of sex.

When I had mine removed, two of the boys (teens) wanted to know what was wrong so I bluntly told them what was happening. Their response? OH. They hoped all went well for me. I had known them several years (7 to be exact) when this happened. They occasionally asked how things were going for me. Both of them are now married, one is a father both grew up on farms. Want the truth, I did not hide it from the entire church if someone asked. Usual response was that they were glad things were better for me. My daughter was the one that told me I didn't need them anymore.

The problem was excessive pain in them. Pathology report did not discover a reason....or I was not told what happened. On of my relatives, when asked about cancer there said he would die with them rather that have them removed to save his life/.

gandalf (imported) wrote: Sun Jul 01, 2018 7:52 am When I had mine removed, two of the boys (teens) wanted to know what was wrong so I bluntly told them what was happening. Their response? OH. They hoped all went well for me. I ha

d known them several years (7 to be exact) when this happened. They occasionally asked how things were going for me. Both of them are now married, one is a father both grew up on farms. Want the truth, I did not hide it from the entire church if someone asked. Usual response was that they were glad things were better for me. My daughter was the one that told me I didn't need them anymore.

The problem was excessive pain in them. Pathology report did not discover a reason....or I was not told what happened. On of my relatives, when asked about cancer there said he would die with them rather that have them removed to save his life/.

Way to go gandalf ! Really great attitude !

That s the kind of straight forward attitude men should have in talking with male teens. They were going to be grown men soon and genuinely wanted to know and learn about what you were going through. You handled it perfect by not being ashamed or keeping it secret or hiding it from those teens. Now they know to make the best use of their balls for life, like the father who is using his for a man s highest use of his balls, to have kids. Being farm boys castration makes sense and works for livestock all the time, why not do it when men need it done ? They handled it like it was no big deal because you showed them bravery and a mature and factual attitude about it as a role model.

They have told countless other teens and men how well you handled your castration and helped countless other teens and men to think about castration of their own balls as a reasonable thing to do and not worth dying over keeping their balls. I suspect that when facing death or castration, most men quickly realize dead balls are just as dead from dying as from getting castrated. They won t save their balls by dying. Might as well give up their gonads and stay alive.

You are really brave in being open to having your whole church know about your castration. It sets an admirable example for men dealing with any kind of sexual problems for you to show such bravery. And you are also letting other men and boys all see how people treat that knowledge and interact with you with respect and genuine concern for your health.

Men are taught way too much shame about our sexual organs. Naked women in art and media don t cause nearly as much controversy as naked men do. Most women seem to discuss pregnancies and menopause openly with no shame. Men should feel free to discuss male sexual concerns equally without any shame.

Those teens and your whole church and the countless people who heard about you all learned a valuable lesson in true bravery and being a real man about your whole situation.

I forgot to say that this was in a farming and cattle raising community. That might be why there were not any questions about the event.

I did not actually publicize it but answered any and all questions asked by friends and neighbors. No need for shame or embarrassment for having it done.

I had a similar experience with some teen ranch hands that work for me. I had injured testicles that my dr wanted to remove. I said no. When I was going to dr appointments my hands asked why ? I explained my nut injuries and how my dr advised castration. My favorite 17 year old hand calmly said, That sucks.

The other teens just smirked silently at the boss being gelded and I m guessing they likely thought it was fitting payback for being the boss. They offered to save me the dr s fees by cutting me like a bull and doubtless thought it would be enjoying every working man s dream to get to castrate his boss for real. A lifetime achievement to brag about proudly lol.

I told them I d let them know and I d seriously think about it. I d much prefer them or my friends gelding me to a dr doing it. But I explained how I m trying to keep my balls for as long as they can keep working at all.

All of them took it like its no big deal. Just some men get wrecked balls. No shock or fear or much reaction at all, just mild amusement that I didn t mind at all and like I think I thought would be expected if my boss told me the same thing lol.

The archive story Dr.Laura, the treatment, has a teen male character saying exactly what my 17 year old hand said, That sucks. I laughed out loud when I read that story ! Life matching fiction.

I don’t hide it and my grand boys have seen me occasionally naked with no balls since the oldest was one year old I know someday they may ask questions but Their dads and myself feel it is better and more normal that way.