Dealing with mental effects of a low testosterone

[coinflipper_21 (imported)]

my testicles have now become small and hard, does this mean they are dysfunctional, I feel a million times worse then I did when I wrote this 20 days ago, I wouldnt be surprised if I have no testosterone in me

I can give you my experiences with low testosterone.

I have a prolactin producing tumor. Prolactin turns off your testosterone production. Before I was diagnosed, my testosterone dropped below 100. I had a life very similar to nutme248's description, overweight, depressed, impotent. The way I describe my extreme depression is that life had a palpable thickness to it, like walking around under water all the time. There was no enjoyment, no zest, nothing but the miserable feeling that life would never get any better than that. Yes, I was suicidal. My testicles became, as your are, small and hard, totally atrophied.

Once I was diagnosed and treated, my testicles still did not recover. My doctor put me on HRT (Androgel). If there was any chance that my testicles would ever recover, the HRT ended that. Outside testosterone added to the system also causes testicular atrophy. Would I ever go off the HRT? Not on your life! The medication that I take to suppress the tumor (inoperable, by the time it was diagnosed) causes some other problems, (Endocrinology, as nullorchis pointed out, is not an exact science.) but I can live with those. There is no way I would ever go back to the way I felt without the HRT.

Question? Has your doctor checked your prolactin level? He probably won't want to do it, because until very recently medical texts said that these tumors were rare and exclusively a woman's problem. This is not true! Your chances of having one during your lifetime, at any age, is about 22%. If your testosterone level continues to decrease, and there is no other obvious reason, have him do the blood test.

[notalife (imported)]

I can give you my experiences with low testosterone.

I have a prolactin producing tumor. Prolactin turns off your testosterone production. Before I was diagnosed, my testosterone dropped below 100. I had a life very similar to nutme248's description, overweight, depressed, impotent. The way I describe my extreme depression is that life had a palpable thickness to it, like walking around under water all the time. There was no enjoyment, no zest, nothing but the miserable feeling that life would never get any better than that. Yes, I was suicidal. My testicles became, as your are, small and hard, totally atrophied.

Once I was diagnosed and treated, my testicles still did not recover. My doctor put me on HRT (Androgel). If there was any chance that my testicles would ever recover, the HRT ended that. Outside testosterone added to the system also causes testicular atrophy. Would I ever go off the HRT? Not on your life! The medication that I take to suppress the tumor (inoperable, by the time it was diagnosed) causes some other problems, (Endocrinology, as nullorchis pointed out, is not an exact science.) but I can live with those. There is no way I would ever go back to the way I felt without the HRT.

Question? Has your doctor checked your prolactin level? He probably won't want to do it, because until very recently medical texts said that these tumors were rare and exclusively a woman's problem. This is not true! Your chances of having one during your lifetime, at any age, is about 22%. If your testosterone level continues to decrease, and there is no other obvious reason, have him do the blood test.

Is it possible for the testicles to recover after they are atrophied, the problem with me are these Varicocele veins on my left testicle and for some reason both my testicles are atrophied

I am still holding out some hope that once I get the surgery perhaps the testicles could be reversed but as it seems every day I feel worse and worse and my testicles get smaller and harder, now I just feel dead so I wouldnt be surprised if they are done

And are there any bad side effects of TRT, before this I hated taking any medication because I always tried to live a natural life and just be one with the world, which is how you are supposed to live if you ask me, but now I am feeling like absolute death and dont think it is possible to live without TRT, how do people live without hormone replacement, what did people do before they invented this

[DavidB (imported)]

are you communicating with your doctor at all. you need to start asking some serious questions. he is going to be the best one to know what type of recovery you will have after surgery. by the way when is the surgery?

[notalife (imported)]

are you communicating with your doctor at all. you need to start asking some serious questions. he is going to be the best one to know what type of recovery you will have after surgery. by the way when is the surgery?

thats the other thing, there is no time table if I did have it it probably wouldnt be for another 6 months

[IbPervert (imported)]

Testosterone the price males pay for having the balls to take over!

[notalife (imported)]

does being on testosterone therapy make you lose your feelings?

I have always been a guy who took pride in my feelings and wore my heart on my sleeves

That is the worst thing about having no natural Testosterone, I dont feel anything at this point

I have always been a guy who prided myself on not taking medication, I was on anti-depressants for a long time and I hated it, and then I found this peace of life but I lost it because this is a cruel world

Does anyone have any problems being on Testosterone, I heard it makes you angry and more angry when you come off it, this isnt an easy thing to do, I am even trying to make an attempt at living life without TRT but that isnt gonna happen because I feel like I am in hell

At this point I am wondering if I should kill myself or take testosterone, I know that sounds crazy but I promise you I doubt you have had the life I had

[ramses (imported)]

Don't worry about anyone HERE judging you for feelings and being a "girl" about it. Even IF it were true, it's who you are and we can accept that without a problem.

Depression is what leaves you with no feelings. It can just make you feel like you don't give a f**K about anything or anyone, especially yourself. When my T was low, I got depressed and really didn't care if I got hit by a train or not. My wife didn't like me that way and told me I needed to start Prozac again as she didn't teally realize that depression is one of the main symptoms of low T. Depression isn't something you can just "snap out of" either. You can't just use inner strength to just get out of it unless you can pry yourself off the couch and start doing some intense regular exercise which is one of the best prescriptions for depression. Alas, one of the first things depressions steals from you is motivation and energy.

[notalife (imported)]

like even now I feel miserable and dead, as these are my true natural feelings, I just hated being on drugs because they dont make you you, they make you the drug

Perhaps other people might not have had the life I had and can go on TRT, I felt I achieved this peace of mind that can only come from you being yourself and I was so looking forward to starting life on it then this thing happened

Now I am at the point wondering if I should go on TRT or just put myself out of my misery

I know this sounds crazy and people are different, if being on TRT makes you happy then go for it, but me I had such a miserable life and was really looking forward to starting life then this horrible thing happened and effectively ended my life

At this point I dont know what I am going to do

I just loved the person who I had the ability to be, just live naturally and be one with the world, I dont think you can be that person while having to rely on a injection or a gel to keep you going in life

I dont know what I am going to do at this point, again not to knock someone who is on TRT and is satisified, but for me I dont think it is ok

[ramses (imported)]

Please don't try to plan your future while you are in this funk. When you are depressed, EVERYTHING seems pointless, a waste of time, or just impossible. Talk to a doctor and just worry about feeling good today and tomorrow. After you are feeling better, you can make adjustments like SLOWLY reducing you T levels if that is what will make you happy. Try some other antidepressants because if you felt like you were some kind of zombie or not yourself, you were on the wrong drug OR wrong dosage. Some docs will start people out at too high of a dose and that will make you feel like hell. I know...

I take 40mg/day of prozac (fluoxetine) but it took some adjusting to. Some of the drugs you have to start real low and then bump it up after 3-4 weeks. Is it ideal to dake pills everyday? No. If you can spend 30 seconds a day taking your medication to have a healthy functional life, it's worth it!!! Hell, It's a lot less hassle than wearing glasses or contacts and many people do that.

Just focus on feeling better for NOW. When you get THERE, you can start worrying about next week and next month.

[Batman (imported)]

I've always been a guy with emotions. I have not trouble relating to women nor they to me (which meant I was the nice guy friend who they didn't want to get involved with a ruin the friendship).

Now I was low T from 2000 (tested) and probably years before that. I've been on injections since May 2007 and have had no drop-off in my emotions. I'm still sensitive and caring..etc

I've not seen any spike in aggressive thoughts/feelings other than MAYBE some road-rage. My thinking is much sharper and clearer, and my decision making is more decisive.

I don't consider TRT as being on medication as much as taking something my body needs and craves.

Batman