Saying goodbye at the introductions

[kristoff]

Let's have the real story, not the posey? Quit bullshitting.

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

Let's have the real story, not the posey? Quit bullshitting.

Don't worry, you get the real story.

But we had some threads before, and there were hard words said.

I also made my promise to show my understanding for the victims(and survivors)

These feelings are real and if you dare to call this bullshitting, it is you who sends my respect for you to the trash

loveUall

Jean

[randy (imported)]

Don't worry, you get the real story.

But we had some threads before, and there were hard words said.

I also made my promise to show my understanding for the victims(and survivors)

These feelings are real and if you dare to call this bullshitting, it is you who sends my respect for you to the trash

loveUall

Jean

what victims ? or tulips? or whatever.

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

what victims ? or tulips? or whatever.

Maybe I could answer: the victims of child abuse, but that would be to little

Maybe you open and read the closed threads:

Castration in the arts, news and websites.....castreer pedofiel

and

General Healt: Psysical and Mental........Paedophilia-The biggest Murder whatsoever

Maybe if you counted clearly how many kinds of victims there are, you let us know.

And then maybe you try to consider that I do care about all of them.

I don't feel happy with that bullshitting comment from kristoff

loveUall

Jean

[randy (imported)]

Those threads are even more confusing than this one.

Interest fading... fading.... fading... gone.

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

Those threads are even more confusing than this one.

Interest fading... fading.... fading...

i was castrated in may of 08 for spiritual reasons. i am Christian and i believe in the fundamentals of Christianity.

i enjoy communicating with eunuchs and people considering castration.

if you have questions about religious castration, non HRT living, becoming a eunuch young in life, prayer requests or anything just send an email. God bless you.

May God bless you to

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

Yesterday I had my consult with the urologist. Strange man, he didn't say three words if two could do. But again, no problems with the communication.

This makes me feel sad about this thread, it just seems to me that we don't speak the same language.

Today I got an injection, another chemical way. The next week, my testosterone level may shoot up, after about two weeks, it should have dropped to about zero.

I have no idea what this first week is going to do to my feelings (and bad behavior). I just hope you can understand that this week might not be the best time for my to write that real story. Or should I say: "Please try to understand"

About the new medication I am on, you can find at the chemical castration sector

loveUall

Jean

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

Well, I had a very "nice" week. Testosterone sure isn't my friend. This hormonal attack brought me several health problems back, but now they are fading a little. And this week brought me one big win...I was able to get myself out of a depression within an hour, just because I didn't accept my old character to gain power over me again.

I still feel sad, that we seem to understand each other so little, and that a story like about the Tulip couldn't explain my feelings.

I promised to tell a truth story and show myself and my feelings. I guess today I will find time to tell a first part, but I like to start with the present, as this is most important to me.

This will mean that I tell you about my current little friend at Vietnam, and I don't want to hurt people. If you are afraid that such a story might hurt your feelings, please don't read it.

On the other hand, maybe try to realize that I do respect you, I do love you all, and maybe it wasn't me that abused or hurt you. Maybe, you pay my little friend and me the respect we deserve, read it and try to understand that not every thing is just as simple as it looks at first sight.

loveUall

Jean

[TeraNata (imported)]

Don't get too discouraged. You speak English well but of course there are some communication difficulties. Maybe try to speak more literally? Metaphors and phrases that make sense in one language don't always translate well.

I think I understand you. But I'd rather not jump to conclusions, so I'll wait and see...

Edit: Jean, just to clear this up at least a bit: is this a pedophile advocacy sort of thing you're working on?

[Jean Op den Kamp (imported)]

Don't get too discouraged. You speak English well but of course there are some communication difficulties. Maybe try to speak more literally? Metaphors and phrases that make sense in one language don't always translate well.

I think I understand you. But I'd rather not jump to conclusions, so I'll wait and see...

Edit: Jean, just to clear this up at least a bit: is this a pedophile advocacy sort of thing you're working on?

Hy,

I saw your posting this morning but I had to start working. Now I see your edit. You really want to get me typing don't you (lol)

Well I am going to ask your help with that last question.

Many times I have the guts to call myself a paedophile. I mean as a child lover, not as a child molester. I might be one of those people who is just in between, and gets hurt again and again by what people like to understand as they only hear the word.

Love is my only weapon, and the truth a shield. Many times I am telling the truth, but also many times in a way that I know before where other peoples thoughts will go. Is that fair? I am not going to judge myself on this point.

It is a way to protect myself. After getting hurt to many times, one likes to find a way to talk about problems, and have them talk about somebody else, no need to take the insults personally. Yes, that is manipulating, fucking up the discussion. Should I feel sorry? As I said I don't want to judge myself on this point, but I do have an open mind, and I am willing to read and consider any comment on this point.

Let me tell you something about communication difficulties:

I was having a nice fight with Kizahakan, as somebody (the___uI) in posting 27 at General health Paedophilia- The Biggest Murder whatsoever... started to offer gasoline and matches....

please mr. Protector-Of-The-Innocent, do something constructive with yourself. we can provide gasoline and matches.

I responded with my view that this is no way of talking, and that at the moment he will offer gasoline and matches to any member of this board, he will find me on his way to take those gasoline and matches and use them on myself. I thought that I was clearly saying that even in that little fight, I would protect any other member including Kizahakan with my own life if needed. The posting get kicked out two times, and as I asked why: I was advocating violence and suicide. The threads got locked.

What was wrong with my words, were they so hard to understand????

If postings like that get kicked out for advocating violence and the posting 27 remains on the board,

How should people ever understand who I am and want kind of a person I am? And using my dictionary on the word "" advocating", maybe you can feel my sadness for not being understood.

I am afraid if I tell them that Jesus dying to save the people, was an act of love, they might block my account

About your "edit" question

I had my first ejaculation(found out myself ) before I knew the difference between a boy and a girl. Maybe it tells you something about the good relation between me and my parents if I tell you that they did apologize.

They were very young, and didn't realize......

But do you think I am advocating paedophilia, if I like to say that I had the right to know, and that I got damaged for my life by the wrong protection?

I had a big friend, I understood nothing, only loved him, and saw him slip away from life, couldn't stop him. It hurt so badly... Am I advocating paedophilia.

I do love children, and this moment a little Vietnamese is my everything....

you may call that advocating paedophilia

But where do I stand. I don't like to judge others, so lets have a look at me.....

If I ever kill a child, be it a sexual murder, or just by driving drunk, I don't want or need a second chance, I would only have a death wish

If I ever rape, brutal molest a child, I don't want or need a second chance,

if you don't kill me, I will

Can you follow me??? I guess you can!!!!!

Is that advocating paedophilia?????

But if I go on........

A relation with a child isn't equal, and to many times I hear that as a blame.

But I accept full responsibility, now, and to him any time in the future. I am not going to hurt him in any way, and if I ever have to find out that it was me who made him unhappy with his life......if you don't.............

Maybe on this point I am not so easy to follow any more. Can this love go so far and so deep? This love is a part of my life, and I am not going to run away from it. And sometimes it is not even a free choice, but one gets kicked in to a situation. Is that advocating paedophilia???????

Maybe you tell me after you have read the story

And maybe you understand that I want a lot of people to come back with their feet on the ground and see things like they are.

I liked those words of you:

But I'd rather not jump to conclusions, so I'll wait and see...

so I added something to your reputation. I have to wait, I can't just do it again for your edit.

loveUall

Jean