Decline of Manners
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Beau Geste (imported)
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Decline of Manners
Maybe I'm just getting old and crotchety, but my impression has been that people, in general, have gotten noticeably ruder and more boorish in the last few years. One of the places where this seems very noticeable is on the highway. The driving practices of motorists have gotten incredibly aggressive. It isn't just people cutting you off, it's a matter of them taking absurd chances, pulling out of driveways right in front of you when you're doing thirty miles an hour or so, and all kinds of risky turns and dangerous passing. It's like people think everybody else is supposed to be watching out for them and giving them the right of way. Maybe this type of behavior has increased just because there are more cars on the road, but it's often quite dangerous. I must have had a half dozen near-accidents because of other drivers' carelessness, in the last two weeks.
And maybe the inconsiderate driving has desensitized people to rudeness in general. Nobody will give you space any more--they act like you're a piece of furniture, or as if you aren't even visible. I think some sociologists have attirubted this to the "jock culture" in high schools and colleges. In sports, politeness is often seen as a sign of weakness, so athletes tend not to be deferential or civil to each other in games, and this spills over into their general behavior. And this is the sort of thing which, once a number of people start doing it, the problem tends to spread to everybody they come into contact with.
I don't know how people could be induced to show more mannerliness and consideration for each other. There are certainly still a lot of people who are polite and mannerly, but they seem definitely in the minority. One bad sign is, that most people who are being rude, don't seem to be aware of it. Maybe I just come from an era when parents actually raised their children, and didn't leave that job to the TV set or the schools, and people were actually taught to pay attention to whether they were rude or inconsiderate to those around them.
And maybe the inconsiderate driving has desensitized people to rudeness in general. Nobody will give you space any more--they act like you're a piece of furniture, or as if you aren't even visible. I think some sociologists have attirubted this to the "jock culture" in high schools and colleges. In sports, politeness is often seen as a sign of weakness, so athletes tend not to be deferential or civil to each other in games, and this spills over into their general behavior. And this is the sort of thing which, once a number of people start doing it, the problem tends to spread to everybody they come into contact with.
I don't know how people could be induced to show more mannerliness and consideration for each other. There are certainly still a lot of people who are polite and mannerly, but they seem definitely in the minority. One bad sign is, that most people who are being rude, don't seem to be aware of it. Maybe I just come from an era when parents actually raised their children, and didn't leave that job to the TV set or the schools, and people were actually taught to pay attention to whether they were rude or inconsiderate to those around them.
Re: Decline of Manners
Yeah, I offered to hold the door at the c-store for a guy on crutches the other day, who was also trying to carrying something. He got in a huff about it, so I politely slammed the door on his ass and knocked him down. I told him "you're welcome, dickhead."
Didn't wanna appear rude.
Didn't wanna appear rude.
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MacTheWolf (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
Paolo wrote: Sun Mar 01, 2009 8:54 pm Yeah, I offered to hold the door at the c-store for a guy on crutches the other day, who was also trying to carrying something. He got in a huff about it, so I politely slammed the door on his ass and knocked him down. I told him "you're welcome, dickhead."
Didn't wanna appear rude.
I wonder the outcome of a similar situation involving the Red Nun. If her sisterhood was walking towards the entrance of a building and a young, smartly dressed business women was about to enter the building; not knowing the young woman is an arch-Feminist, the Sister opens the door for her and receives a complimentary kick in the groin for his trouble.
Would the good sister ever be so polite again and how many months would the young business woman spend in traction?
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IbPervert (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
Just tonight I was in the nearby Walmart and was trying to get to the cooking oil. This Mexican family was standing right in the way. I stood there for a moment when they looked right at me and then turned back to keep talking. That is when I simply started pushing, for which they just looked at me like I was in their way.
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micropenis (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
Where do I start?
First: You are getting old and crochety, and so am I.
Second: Manners are almost a dead concept.
Third: Fathers are usually absent and mothers are to busy telling thier kids how wonderful they are to bother with making them civil.
Many people are so obsessed with thinking about what needs to be done that they don't think about what they are in the middle of doing. It's part of the more, better, faster mentality that dominates the world today. What we get for it is less, worse and half-fast (half-assed). This gives us more than enough reason to be crochety.
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Jean Op den Kamp (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
Paolo wrote: Sun Mar 01, 2009 8:54 pm Yeah, I offered to hold the door at the c-store for a guy on crutches the other day, who was also trying to carrying something. He got in a huff about it, so I politely slammed the door on his ass and knocked him down. I told him "you're welcome, dickhead."
Didn't wanna appear rude.
So in this kind of situations I should realize that I am a lucky basterd.
Many times I can accept it just like that, it's their problem, I easily stay polite even for the next lout. So I need to say nothing.
If I get in a huff myself, I can tell him, saying nothing
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Arab Nights (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
My repeated line to my kids is: Nobody is born knowing that stuff. That goes for math, English, manners, work ethic taking personal responsibility, not abusing drugs or alcohol and so on. If nobody teaches kids, then we have only ourselves to blame. Aside from math, English, etc., it should not be the schools that teach those things. Maybe we need to look in the mirror and have a talk with ourselves.
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royal-31 (imported)
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micropenis (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
Jean Op den Kamp (imported) wrote: Mon Mar 02, 2009 6:30 am Many times I can accept it just like that, it's their problem, I easily stay polite even for the next lout. So I need to say nothing.
They will continue to be socially unacceptable as long as they can get away with it. If thier mothers or school didn't teach them manners, it might be a good idea, for society as a whole, to take a moment and let them no just how rude and oblivious they are being. Nobody can give me crap if I wont take it. If somebody is being an asshole to me I show then that I can return the favor. I often enjoy doing it too.
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Jean Op den Kamp (imported)
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Re: Decline of Manners
micropenis (imported) wrote: Mon Mar 02, 2009 10:09 am They will continue to be socially unacceptable as long as they can get away with it. If thier mothers or school didn't teach them manners, it might be a good idea, for society as a whole, to take a moment and let them no just how rude and oblivious they are being. Nobody can give me crap if I wont take it. If somebody is being an asshole to me I show then that I can return the favor. I often enjoy doing it too.
Maybe you didn't get the message. It's easy for me to stay polite.
If I need to teach them to be polite, what a start do I make if I don't.
And sorry if it's hard to understand, but if I say nothing that doesn't have to mean they don't get the message