Castration for Sexless Marriage?

[mrt (imported)]

I've been the route of asking her to assess why she has no libido. She refuses any kind of HRT; she acknowledges she has no interest in sex. She is moreover a physician herself (physician: heal thyself...). She believes that HRT has more drawbacks than benefits based on her practice.

To be frank, the loss of my libido would not be a great tragedy to me. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. There are many other interesting things to do in life.

Without soundling like I'm finding fault with you or that I'm some kind of know it all please consider this (And I think its true) real castration is not just about sex drive. There are a lot of erotic stories here on the archive that talk about how great it is but the truth is far different from the fiction.

One problem with "test drives" using chemical castration is that your perception is clouded by how well your wired and hormones clearly wire men to be men. So you may well feel that your "normal" when in fact your acting depressed with lack of energy and sex drive as well as serious mood problems.

I have a slightly older friend who has divorced several times and he said Menopause and lack of sex drive was the core reason each time. Your wife is probably feeling that she is "normal" and your requests for sex are abnormal.

If she is a doctor ask her to look into Bio Identical Hormones and in particular Compounded ones. These restore Estrogen, Progesterone and Testosterone. Plus they often use the less powerful for of Estrogen which some people think is safer. Be honest and tell her what your planning to do to yourself. I rather doubt she will think chemical castration is a good idea if she is wigged out about female HRT.

[A-1 (imported)]

Maybe I can slip some into her tea

Coinflipper is right, I can't get so much as a hug out of my wife. The only intimacy she allows is a quickie maybe once a week or if I'm lucky, twice. I was even told during more than one time to "hurry up and get it over with". Didn't do much for me I must admit.

I long to actually make love to her, you know, where both are satisfied. Except it's now, "I long to make love to a woman". Any woman. It's a longing that is sure to get me into trouble as I am a lousy liar.

I think that you BOTH need counselling. Run, don't walk to a professional marriage counsellor, one not connected with a church and if your wife will not go with you, then YOU GO ALONE.

Your story has TROUBLE written all over it.

Please, just do it, O.K.?

[Batman (imported)]

If she is a doctor ask her to look into Bio Identical Hormones and in particular Compounded ones. These restore Estrogen, Progesterone and Testosterone. Plus they often use the less powerful for of Estrogen which some people think is safer. Be honest and tell her what your planning to do to yourself. I rather doubt she will think chemical castration is a good idea if she is wigged out about female HRT.

Just to add to what mrt already said, and maybe I'm saying the same thing in a bit of a different way...but..

If you chemically or otherwise castrate yourself, you won't be the same person you are right now. There would be a fundamental change to you mentally and physically...she may not like what you become and you marriage could end anyways..

Counseling for one or both sounds like a reasonable course of action.

Good Luck

Batman

[ramses (imported)]

A good place to start with marriage counsuling is www.marriagebuilders.com. They offer tons of free information but sell some books to. The cool thing is that they offer so much good free information, you don't really have to buy the book. It also offers good info on dealing effectively with marriage counsulers.

[datyiasp (imported)]

SexlessC23

I advise you to seriously consider the wise counsel given you from each poster in this thread.

Some of my observations: You have a healthy libido and do some serious wanking to porn; You have great desire to make love to a woman but are afraid of trouble because you're a lousy liar; You desire to castrate yourself for a wife who won't even give you a hug; Most 50 y.o. men wish they could perform at 80% efficiency-maybe Viagra?; Your religion bans extramarital sex AND castration so you won't shag other than your wife but will cut your nuts off. I'd hose some honey on the side and KEEP the jewels if I had my choice of sins. ; You equate hypogonadism effects with castration effects. Did you suffer hot flushes? What illness caused hypogonadic problems for you?

Please listen to the advice the other posters have given you and seek counsel from professional and qualified individuals only!

Do you honestly believe a woman who won't even hug you would be thrilled with her hubby's balls as an offering? Would she instead rather feed your "manhood" to the dog, throw you out and then replace you with a "complete" man? Would the new man be sexless with her or would she give him everything she's denying you?

Please seek counsel!

Thank you.

[datyiasp (imported)]

SexlessC23

(I meant to incorporate this post into my previous post but was unable to figure how to re-edit. I regret the error).

It is well known that much bicycling injures an important artery feeding blood to the penis. Apparently the constant pressures between the seat and this artery causes it to constrict, resulting in erection and ED problems due to insufficient blood flow to the penis.

I understand that special bicycle seats are made that can mitigate that problem by removing the small portion of the seat causing that irritation.

I know more than one person who has suffered from this. I know there is a surgery that repairs this condition. My suggestion is to locate a knowledgeable physician to assess this common malady and restore your erectile capability. This could very well help your self esteem AND your marital difficulties.

It can be hard to understand how a simple bicycle seat can cause such complex difficulties, but I believe checking this scenario with the right doctor may give you some very good options to heal your health AND home anxieties.

Good luck!

Thank you.

[SexlessC23 (imported)]

I doubt it's the bike. First of all it's a custom-built road bike, made to measure. It's the most comfortable thing I have ever worn

Plus, I have done in the past up to 3000 km each summer. I stopped riding quite a while ago when my energy gave out. This year was the first summer in about 10 years that I have ridden seriously, and so far have done just over 1000 km so far and I should be good for a couple of hundred more before the snow flies. I can get decent wood for a guy my age, in fact the last couple of moths have been even better: vigorous exercise improves my blood flow including to my penis, and if I exercise I get better wood. But before diagnosis of my illness, things were going downhill fast and even vigorous masturbation only produced an unstable partial erection.

The disease btw, is hereditary hemochromatosis. It's easily treatable if caught early and doesn't affect life expectancy if caught early enough but I have to remain in maintenance treatments for the rest of my life (giving blood every 2-3 months).

[datyiasp (imported)]

Hemochromatosis is a puppy that can surely do you in! No argument about it. Please go easy on your liver and pancreas.

My most conservative estimate is that you have bicycled the equivalent of the Earth's circumference at the equator. I would not doubt that you have cycled twice that distance in your lifetime. I don't know what kind of doctor specializes in maladies of bicyclists. I urge you to seek one out and let him determine what, if any, physical trauma 40,000km of cycling may have caused you to suffer.

Seeing your sexual capabilities are what many men your age could only wish for, what is your point of "fixing" something that isn't broken? How far did Van Gogh get with the self ablation of his ear? How many billions are spent each year by men trying to regain sexually that ability you now possess?

My own experiences have taught me that marriages in the state your's is in do two things. They keep adding baggage and adversely increase in momentum. You sound like a bright man. Please seek professional counseling! Sometimes it is wiser to fold your cards, take your losses and wait to see the next deal rather than trying to bluff your way with a pair of deuces.

Do your best to right your ship if you can. Bail out otherwise while you still have the time to grab the lifeboat and get safely to shore.

The best way to repair a woman problem is to replace her with a better woman, NOT by removing your testicles! The ratio of decent, available ladies needing a good man your age is stacked in YOUR favor! Just walk around your own neighborhood and you'll literally be tripping all over them!

Good luck!

Thank you.

[cb2000user (imported)]

I to have Hemochromatosis and before chemical castration I had to give a pint of blood evey two months to keep my feritin levels below 35. Now the strange part, since my T-levels dropped below 140 I have not had to give blood and my feritin is at 28 and steady. I see my doctor every 3 months for lab work and the last 9 months everything has been in the correct levels although he is always trying to put me on HRT to bring up my T-level. I am sure the Androcur is keeping the feritin in check but I do not miss that 16ga needle in my arm. Did I find a cure for Hemochromatosis, do not think so but chemical castration is working on two fronts now.

[SexlessC23 (imported)]

I am also giving blood every 2-3 months; my ferritin is in the mid-20s as well and my saturation is low. Does your doc think your low T level is due to the hemochromatosis? Mine was at the lower end of the normal range at diagnosis, but is now at the high end of the range. When it was at the lower end, I definitely did feel something wrong with my libido, I had less penile sensation, and very poor quality erections. Now everything is more or less back to close to normal.

This week, I am bouncing off the walls due to my sex drive.

What effect, if any, did the hemochromatosis have on your sexual function? I was diagnosed with ferritin at 900 and saturation at nearly 90% (high-end normal is 300 and 35% for those wondering)