Toilet Cleaning Instructions

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Charis (imported)
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Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by Charis (imported) »

1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this..

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'power-wash' and rinse'.

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean

Sincerely,

The Dog 🐱🛍️
justpaul (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by justpaul (imported) »

That's terrible, horrible, heartless. Think I'll give it a try as soon as I can borrow a cat :) Thanks for the post!
MacTheWolf (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by MacTheWolf (imported) »

Old joke but still funny :)

Especially considering the dog wrote it.
gunpowdercub (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by gunpowdercub (imported) »

Now I realize that was meant in fun. I actually laughed a little. I realize there are cat haters out there, though, who might take this to heart.

So this is why I would never try that with my cat: she runs the house and me.

She was a stray in my old neighborhood of North Park Slope. Unlike other strays, she was friendly, however, and would come to me and talk to me quite a bit in our several street encounters. In a parking lot where neighbors would leave food for other stray cats, this skinny young thing was not welcomed by the rest of the strays and they would not allow her near the food. She'd eat arroz con pollo leftovers from trashcans (in our mostly Spanish Caribbean neighborhood.) One chilly drizzly December night, I saw her curled up asleep on a stoop getting soaked. She heard my footstep, woke up and ran over to me, talking a mile a minute. I told her if she found her way to my house, she could come in and stay no matter what the other cat would say about it. And just about a week later, there she was carefully inspecting all the houses on my block just as I was stepping out of house for an evening grocery store visit. She ran right over to me, again talking a mile a minute. What choice did I have? I found a box in another neighbor's trash, put her in the box, carried her upstairs, unboxed her in the bathroom, then headed out for extra food, a second littlerbox, and my groceries. She ate a full can of food in one sitting, then jumped on my lap, curled up in the crook of my elbow, purred herself to sleep and entranced me forever.

Among the exceptional things this cat has done for me: a close work friend died from breast cancer, and I was unprepared for the news. I didn't take it well. The cat (Coppertop) comforted me doing something she had never done before: stuck her head on my neck and purred me to sleep.

There was an intruder in my apartment. I did not hear him enter, but she did, and she warned me, walking stiff legged with her tail straight out, howling at him. He could have killed me if he had a weapon (all i had in hand was my cereal spoon.) He left through the fire escape when he heard me (ahem) stir.

She has caught mice (and bugs) in each dwelling we've lived. When my partner died, she slept with me every night for six months, allowing me to hold her like a teddy bear... or like i'd hold him.

I'd go on, but I'd go over the character limit (if I haven't already.)

GPC
Blaise (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by Blaise (imported) »

"
Charis (imported) wrote: Sun Jul 27, 2008 6:01 am The cat will self agitate and make ample suds.
"

I miss my cat Georgia. She died in 1987. She feared water. But she would come into the bathroom to get her kittens. The kittens enjoyed sitting on the side of the tub while I bathed. I never once bathed Georgia during our sixteen years together. She never once needed a bath. Every other cat did need one--well not Georgia's son Sorefoot.

Georgia would have bathed me if I had ever put her in the tub. She would have given me the baptism I would not have had to worry about forgetting.

I never quite understood why Georgia seemed to live in terror. I was the only one who ever had her after Linda brought her from Louisiana to Oregon. Georgia had the traits of an animal profoundly abused. But I have never liked any pet as much as I liked her. Well, I liked her son Sorefoot and their son Malraux

Linda and I made certain that Georgia received estrogen shots for birth control after her first couple of years. She lived as a young cat until just before she died.
eunuch2001 (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by eunuch2001 (imported) »

Most cats hate water and I cannot tolerate cruelty to cats. I never shared my life with a cat until a friend died and I "inherited" her cat. That darling cat became my closest friend. She's been dead 3 years now and I miss her still. She meant more to me than any human ever has, and that includes family, friends and work colleagues. If I thought anyone had put a cat in a toilet and flushed it I'd set fire to their house...even if it was eunuch!!! So be warned.
wolfpuck (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by wolfpuck (imported) »

my friend has a cat that absolutely loves baths and water. she jumps into the tub when ever there is water in it and she'd swim around in it.
Blaise (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by Blaise (imported) »

eunuch2001 (imported) wrote: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:07 pm Most cats hate water and I cannot tolerate cruelty to cats. I never shared my life with a cat until a friend died and I "inherited" her cat. That darling cat became my closest friend. She's been dead 3 years now and I miss her still. She meant more to me than any human ever has, and that includes family, friends and work colleagues. If I thought anyone had put a cat in a toilet and flushed it I'd set fire to their house...even if it was eunuch!!! So be warned.
You just received some well deserved appreciation points. My father-in-law did not cry when his beloved slster died but when Georgia's daughter died, he did weep.
Blaise (imported)
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Re: Toilet Cleaning Instructions

Post by Blaise (imported) »

wolfpuck (imported) wrote: Sun Jul 27, 2008 2:35 pm my friend has a cat that absolutely loves baths and water. she jumps into the tub when ever there is water in it and she'd swim around in it.
I've had cats who jumped in the tub with me. Of course, I am good. :D 🙋
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