New comer

[tadpole (imported)]

Hello to anyone on this list.

I am a new comer here, just joined. I am looking for others who think/feel like I do. I was castrasted for prostate cancer and found, to my grreat surprise, that I rather liked the psychological effects. Am I alone or are there others like me?

[Andrew (imported)]

Hello to anyone on this list.

I am a new comer here, just joined. I am looking for others who think/feel like I do. I was castrasted for prostate cancer and found, to my grreat surprise, that I rather liked the psychological effects. Am I alone or are there others like me?

Oh, there are quite a few like you, and some are here in the Eunuch Archives. Of course, since we live in a society which worships sex, not too many men will admit that they are quite happy without the testosterone powered sex drive or aggressiveness. So, yes, once they experience "The Eunuch Calm", many men do not resume testosterone HRT, even if it was safe. (Of course, for prostate cancer treatment, no testosterone is allowed, and in fact they may also shut down your adrenal glands with drugs like Csodex. Have they done that yet?)



Oh, I am age 57, castrated at age 56. Totally non-sexual nowadays. Formerly heterosexual, masturbating once a day right up to the date of castration.

[plezherus (imported)]

Hello to anyone on this list.

I am a new comer here, just joined. I am looking for others who think/feel like I do. I was castrasted for prostate cancer and found, to my grreat surprise, that I rather liked the psychological effects. Am I alone or are there others like me?

Welcome Taddy-

Ahh, yes. Sex sells, bought not everyone is buying.

-plezherus

[Charlieje (imported)]

Hey, Tadpole, and welcome!

I am a relative newcomer here myself. For reasons I have never been able to understand I did not find this site until last fall (Thanks, Paolo, for your post in AEQ).

At any rate I think you will find everyone here friendly and supportive. That's what this site is about, in my experience: SUPPORT! We are gay and straight, eunuchs and eunuch wannabe's, nullo's and nullo wannabes, and everything in between. Enjoy, Tadpole! I know I have certainly done that since I first arrived!

[Paolo]

Welcome to the zoo, tadpole.

You'll find that there a few here who aren't crazed sex fiends!

(But there's nothing wrong with that, either ... this is a good place for them to be, in the long run I think.)

Feel free to post away and enjoy.

:p

[TerryUK (imported)]

Hello to anyone on this list.

I am a new comer here, just joined. I am looking for others who think/feel like I do. I was castrasted for prostate cancer and found, to my grreat surprise, that I rather liked the psychological effects. Am I alone or are there others like me?

Hi - glad to hear from you. I also have prostate cancer. At present I am receiving implants of LH-RH hormone to bring my testosterone levels down into the castrate range prior to starting radio-therapy on March 4. I still have my balls but, like you, I am liking the effect that "chemical castration" has had on me so far and I am looking forward to being surgically castrated after I have completed the radio-therapy.

I should like to hear more of your experiences. If you would like to email me privately, my email address is:

terence@fernside.u-net.com

look forward to hearing from you

Terry

(England)

[tadpole (imported)]

Well after a day I finally made my way back here. It took me forever to figure out how to use the passwords etc. In any case, I am deligthed with all of the kind folks who replies to my "newcomer" post.

Here is a long follow up:

I believe that I am unusual for your community in that I never considered myself anything but a male until I got chemically castrated for prostate cancer. However, I am most assuredly delighted now not to be a male. I have been off to the library studying the history, anthropology, and psychology of eunuchs for some months now. All of that has been to better understand what is going on in my head. Hopefully, eventually, I would like to see if I can help others with prostate cancer live with, and even possibly enjoy, the side effects of some of their treatments. This requires demystifying and devilifying the concept of the eunuch.

I have been going back and forth over this weekend between some prostate cancer listservs and reading the postings on TSDoItYourselfers. It is ABSOLUTELY fascinating to see these two communities of people who are taking the EXACT same gender-associated and gender-altering drugs, with TOTALLY different perspectives on them.

In any case I have a whole slew of questions that I hope you and others on this list can help me answer.

1. Am I on the right list?

2. If not, which list(s) should I be on? There are too many lists/chatrooms out there. I really want to find the best one or two to track. And they are...???

3. How do people in the TS community view the term "eunuch"? I see myself as "coming out" as a eunuch. But I have found that most people either have no idea what that term means including, believe it or not, a FtM TS who I met and who have never heard the term, plus my older daughter, who is a 2nd year gender studies major in college!

4. I am not into self-mutilation, but I am medically and mentally a eunuch. How will the world see me, when I come as a eunuch? My doctors and sisters and several very close friends (my "cyber-seraglio") support me in doing this, but what sort of reactions will I get from others? In China there used to be pogroms against the eunuchs. If we had more exposure now, what would we face? Would we be endlessly marginalized--presumed to be sexual deviants--when, ironically, we are at the other end of the sexual spectrum?

I have been trying to figure out the eunuch.org websites, to get some guidance. And this maybe the place I belong, but the focus here seems to be largely on anatomy, fantasy, sexuality. And I am finding it hard to sort through all that is here.

5. I have decided that the nearest thing to what I am (since I am not into home surgery and in general don't want any more surgery) is neither F, M, trans, FtM nor MtF...rather I am instead a simple, modern-day eunuch. I want to find others like myself to correspond with. But I can't spend five hours a day in chat rooms. I have 2+ fulltime careers right now. And with a need to keep on top of prostate cancer, I am pushed to the limit. I thus really need some guidance. Where, if anywhere is, my community?

6. Many people on eunuch.org praise Dr. Spector. But I have seen his name in association with Victor Cheney. And that scares me. What do people think of Victor Cheney's writing? [Is he still alive? His email account is closed out.] His views scare the hell out of me. He makes me feel like I must be a pedophile just because I am happy to be castrated. But am I alone in that view?

7. Is there any incidences of prostate cancer in the MtF TS world? I would guess that it is very low. But it must be grievous when it happens.

8. Who are--if there are any--the real scholars objectively studying the psychology of the modern day eunuch?

I am immensely grateful for all who take the time to reply to this message.

[Paolo]

1. Am I on the right list?

Certainly. There's quite a bit of information here and some very informed members

2. If not, which list(s) should I be on? There are too many lists/chatrooms out there. I really want to find the best one or two to track. And they are...???

I receive mail from a couple of Yahoo groups, 'eunuch' and 'eunuchs', in addition to this board. I seldom read the usenet group alt.eunuchs.questions anymore. As for any other lists, I don't have the time - nor the inclination really - to read any of them.

3. How do people in the TS community view the term "eunuch"? I see myself as "coming out" as a eunuch. But I have found that most people either have no idea what that term means including, believe it or not, a FtM TS who I met and who have never heard the term, plus my older daughter, who is a 2nd year gender studies major in college!

I first learned the word 'eunuch' when I was about 9 or so, in church, reading the book of Daniel. It's not really a common word you hear in most conversations these days ... as far as the TS view on eunuchs, I think this sounds like a job for Kelly.

4. I am not into self-mutilation, but I am medically and mentally a eunuch. How will the world see me, when I come as a eunuch? My doctors and sisters and several very close friends (my "cyber-seraglio") support me in doing this, but what sort of reactions will I get from others? In China there used to be pogroms against the eunuchs. If we had more exposure now, what would we face? Would we be endlessly marginalized--presumed to be sexual deviants--when, ironically, we are at the other end of the sexual spectrum?

Being a eunuch in this day and age doesn't carry the same kind of weight that it once did in other cultures of the past. There are no exclusive eunuch positions in government anymore, and no harems to guard or jobs that require one to be a eunuch to fill said job. It's mainly a medical issue now, and even if anyone knows, rational adults that is, I don't think there's going to be any big deal made about it. Statistics - wherever they get those from - say that there are a great many men who lose their balls each year for medical reasons, yet you don't see those men on TV, on the news, in the paper, whatever, making a show of being ostracized or hated such as gays and lesbians or other groups that aren't "normal." I just love that word, "normal" .... Anyway, if anyone should find out that you're missing a set of testicles, I don't think it's going to impact your everyday life much.

I have been trying to figure out the eunuch.org websites, to get some guidance. And this maybe the place I belong, but the focus here seems to be largely on anatomy, fantasy, sexuality. And I am finding it hard to sort through all that is here.

There IS a great deal of fantasy here, which I believe harbors a safe outlet for fantasy as well as a forum for discussing real issues. The story archive, of couse, is fantasy, but you will find some interesting and well informed people on the message boards.

5. I have decided that the nearest thing to what I am (since I am not into home surgery and in general don't want any more surgery) is neither F, M, trans, FtM nor MtF...rather I am instead a simple, modern-day eunuch. I want to find others like myself to correspond with. But I can't spend five hours a day in chat rooms. I have 2+ fulltime careers right now. And with a need to keep on top of prostate cancer, I am pushed to the limit. I thus really need some guidance. Where, if anywhere is, my community?

Let's hope you find some friends here with similar situations, tadpole. If nothing else, search Yahoo and the other big web servers on your subject, make a few posts. Install an instant messenger system like MSN or AIM or something. Forget ICQ, it's a RAM hog and nothing but a system choker now. The only way to meet people online is go out and look for them!

6. Many people on eunuch.org praise Dr. Spector. But I have seen his name in association with Victor Cheney. And that scares me. What do people think of Victor Cheney's writing? [Is he still alive? His email account is closed out.] His views scare the hell out of me. He makes me feel like I must be a pedophile just because I am happy to be castrated. But am I alone in that view?

I found Cheney's views skewed, his books poorly written and lacking credible sources. Some people praise Dr. Spector, while others would just as soon have his head on a plate. Spector has since sort of retired from doing the surgeries, and has a younger fellow working for him now.

As for feeling like a pedophile since you're happy to be a eunuch, that's not really a valid comparison. Having sexual urges towards children and simply not wanting your balls for whatever reasons are not one in the same. There is some controversy over castration of sex offenders, but it's not an automatic procedure and many are violently opposed to it. I've read several cases where the defendant even asked for it, and was refused.

You also shouldn't feel strangely about having been castrated, as you mention. Of course, you will feel different, but as far as feeling like a criminal, or dirty or something? Nonsense. Toss the Cheney books out the window and search up some reading from a credible author. You probably wont' find much written up about modern day eunuchs; what is out there is mostly history. You can find, on something like Amazon.com with a good search engine, the books by Peter Scholz (Poitr) and Gary Taylor, Eunuchs & Castrati, a cultural History & Castration: A Brief History of Western civilization. The latter is pretty dull reading though, but it does have a few good social points on the metaphorical as well as actual castration and related subjects in modern society.

7. Is there any incidences of prostate cancer in the MtF TS world? I would guess that it is very low. But it must be grievous when it happens.

I doubt it. Hello, Kelly and Pippa? Advice here?

. Who are--if there are any--the real scholars objectively studying the psychology of the modern day eunuch?

Got me grabbed. Dunno, really, other than some of us here.

[tadpole (imported)]

Thanks for the reply.

Clearly I should clarify one thing. When I talk about "coming out as a eunuch" I am talking about something far more public than telling a few friends that I have been chemical castrated. I really mean publicly coming out. I have, in fact, drafted an essay titled "Coming out as a Eunuch," which I have submitted for publication. If it doesn't get accepted where I submitted it, it will get accepted somewhere. I say that because I make part of my living writing and publishing essays. [Have others out there published similar essays in the straight press? If so, could I get reprints?]

I see a case for the" third gender" perspective developed by Serena Nanda in her books, as well as by others in the G. Herdt ed. volume "Third Sex/Third Gender" [As an aside, have others read that book? What do you think of it? Do you know about the new book by S. Tougher about to come on eunuchs in history "and beyond"? Has anyone read it in preprint? As an aside in an aside, I get the feeling that our classicist colleagues write about eunuchs, but don't talk to them (us) very often.]

I also see a case for selling the view that there are some special powers and privileges to being a eunuch, which--if one opens one's minds to it--are much better than viewing oneself as a crippled male, which is about how most prostate cancer patients view themselves.

To make this case, I have to go public. But as you can see from my last email, I am starting to get a bit scared of what sort of reaction I might get.

Dioes any of that make sense?

[Paolo]

I didnt' know that S. Tougher had published a book. I've read some of his stuff online at his site, lost the link long ago to a HD crash though. As I recall, he's a college prof. somewhere. I'll look for it, though.

As for publishing an essay, well, stranger things have been published. I, for one, would look forward to reading it. Perhaps after it's published it would make a good addition to the Non-Fiction board. I think you'll find a lot of agreement here that such articles SHOULD be published and made available to the public.

When I experienced my own medical problems a few years back, the one last final infection that shut down my testicles, everyone knew that there was something badly wrong with me. I DID try to avoid the issue of talking about it, but finally got disgusted and just came right out with it. Pretty much everyone who knows me knows about it now. The first general reaction was one of stunned silence, shock, and a lot of pity (from the men), which was - to me - a rather useless emotional reaction. For a few months, it was a fascinating topic, but people tend to adapt to pretty much everything and once the shock of it wore off, it wasn't a problem. It was never actually a problem, but in the beginning, it was certainly a great deal of explaining to do in the fact that I was of the opinion that I'd just as soon be castrated and be done with all the problems. THAT'S a real show stopper, right there. But again, people adapt.

I really don't what to advise, as far as how anyone and everyone, John Q. Public per say, would view you or anyone in your essay. I really don't. We seem to live in a society that is locked into the 2 gender norm, male or female, and we often find ourselves wondering, "Is that a woman or a man?" when we see a rather Androgynous person. I think it must be instilled into our little psyches as children, and anything that deviates from it is, at least for a while, interesting if not fascinating.

But as to how anyone would view YOU, in your 'coming out' with it, I don't know. I wish I did.