Sex Without Sex Urges

[Beau Geste (imported)]

One of the more frequent comments made by those with low testosterone, who have subnormal levels of the hormone either because of a glandular disorder, because they are taking androcur or a similar drug, or because they have gone through orchiectomy; is that they no longer feel sex urges, or simply have no more interest in sex. And, of course, for a considerable number of those with low testosterone levels, that was what they wanted when they opted for chemical or surgical reduction of the hormone--the idea was a reduction of libido. And it seems as though some feel that, since they have no pressing sex urge any longer, their sexual activity has been terminated, perhaps permanently.

But, when you think about it, the urge is really just the motivation to engage in sex. The actual responses and pleasure which people experience, come from sensations that, at least in substantial measure, aren't the result of the effects of testosterone on the body. And a lot of people--not necessarily in the Archive, but in the general population--say that, for them, the desire to engage in sexual activity with someone, is something that they feel even though they may not have strong urges which impel them to it. I can remember becoming interested in a few girls a considerable period of time before puberty. I didn't have any urge to engage in sex with them, but I was attracted to them. And I've read that research in the last few years has shown that young boys and girls are attracted to each other to some extent in the preadolescent period, when they (presumably) aren't actually interested in sex. That is to say, sexual attraction may be part of the human makeup, exclusive of sexual development and high hormone levels.

All of which makes me wonder if the lack of sexual activity among a lot of those with low testosterone, is really largely a matter of conditioning and the acceptance of social or societal expectations, rather than something which is unavoidable because of the low hormone levels. Simply the fact that someone becomes accustomed to engaging in sex when he (or she) feels a strong urge, doesn't mean that a person can't develop a behavior pattern of engaging in sexual activity without feeling the urges which usually instigate sex. And the acts ought to be enjoyable, because the sensations are still there, even if there was no strong arousal beforehand. If the posts I recall reading were accurate, many eunuchs, if not most, can still attain erection, and that's all that's required to make intromission possible. But, even if someone is impotent, there are other tactile elements of sex which can still be engaged in.

Actually, I tend to wonder if the loss of the ability to erect, the atrophy of the penis, and difficulty in reaching orgasm, are simply the result of disuse of the organs involved, rather than something which inevitably is a byproduct of lowered testosterone levels. If someone doesn't feel the urge to engage in sex, he doesn't get involved in sexual activity, and the organs are underutilized in that respect, or aren't used at all. It seems a general principle, that any part of the body which isn't used for its regular purpose, will get "out of tone" and it seems that that is possible with regard to the genitals of someone who isn't engaging in sex. Some of the posts I have read, indicate that the atrophy of the penis occurs because nocturnal erections cease after testosterone levels drop. But, for most individuals, it would seem that the organ can be erected through manual stimulation. Perhaps if somebody followed a regimen of stimulating his organ to erection several times a day, the penis wouldn't atrophy, or wouldn't atrophy as much as appears to be typical.

Anyway, my point is, sexual activity is possible without sex urges, and I would think that someone who wants to engage in sex, could do it, to some extent, regardless of a lack of testosterone. Maybe attitude is as big a barrier to enjoying this sort of thing, as physiological changes are. For those who wanted lower testosterone levels because they wanted to reduce their libido, of course that's their choice, and they may feel more at peace with the world and with themselves in that situation. But I'd think that there are many others who still want to have the fulfillment of engaging in sex, and perhaps are artificially limiting their potential for it.

[DonFL (imported)]

in my experience, my sexuality regressed to a pre-puberty level when i was on chems. I, er, comforted my self a few times a week still, normally not to any type of orgasm, which was not a driving need, jsut the comfort action... Often i did it when stressed. After a my chems had really worked their effect i met several people who i had sexual encounters with, mostly for the campanionship, as i hate to be alone i find now that my T level is under control.. The funy thing is i was technically a virgin (I was only 24) before my chems, i had never had relations with a woman or man, but after it i was more driven to seek championship rather than sex. During my castrate time i never started physical things as i just wanted the mental connection.. I used caverject and other help to allow me to preform, or used other ways besides intercourse, which i still consider sex in all its meaning..

because all my real sexual experience comes from during my castration level T period, I am having a different experience than most guys. I never fully accepted that intercourse is all there is, i am still fine to not have it as long as there is another means of... closeness..

physically my TRT sexuality experiences are very different than my castrate experience, things are more intense and im more focused on the physical, release is stronger and more powerful, but i can only do it once now before recovering.. I dont need caverject or anything else anymore... weather this all is good or bad remains to be seen, but my GF wants to be physically wanted as well as our mental connection, but dosnt every woman?

Pre castrate (before i went on depo-provera or lupron depot) my hormone level was at such an extreme (3100ng/dl) i never thought of closeness and therefore never dated. I only thought of myself. This is the other extreme of the spectrum. I was actually scared of myself at this level, and what i might do...

I think sexuality is more than just the hormonal driven release, i also think its part of the human experience. We are social creatures driven to love each other, we need someone in our lives to make it worth while.

[A-1 (imported)]

You're on to something, Beau. I think it can be any combination of emotional physical or mental stimulation or needs. I've known women who were brought up in strict evangelical Christian doctrine. Even though their bodies were flooded with hormones, and they were emotionally into a man, the mental aspect - their learned senses of morals: "Women aren't supposed to do those things" and, "Women aren't supposed to enjoy that, even with their husbands" can cause them to be what we called Frigid.

I've known men just like that. I've heard Baptists swear that lust is a sin, even if it's a man lusting for his own wife. Sex = Sin in their culture.

SALAMI!

Your point makes much sense and rings of truth.

...except that Baptists are NOT supposed to SWEAR, dammit!

[homptydumpty (imported)]

i had a wet dream last night........

[mrt (imported)]

Sex wasn't a big interest when I was low. More of an Annoyance. Oh not THAT again. I engaged in sex to the point of orgasm and at best it felt "nice" and my main reaction was Good were done with that for a while.

Going on HRT changed that a lot. The desire came back but the orgasm went from "ho humm" to POW ZOWIE BATMAN!!!!

[twaddler (imported)]

...

i had never had relations with a woman or man, but after it i was more driven to seek championship rather than sex.

Ah, the call of the ring is a difficult call to ignore.

[tugon (imported)]

I still have interest in sex. I still like looking at attractive men. I enjoy pleasing my partner and the physical closeness. Now I would not have sex just for the sake of sex. My sex drive seems to now be linked to my emotional needs. If I have strong emotions for someone I also have strong physical desires.

[plix (imported)]

I have always been told that libido is mostly mental and that it will decrease little if any when castrated. That doesn't seem to be the case for me. With my current T level, which is probably between 10-50 ng/dl, I have very little to no libido. Sure, I can bring to mind the thoughts that used to get me off - but they don't anymore. I have little to no interest in sex. Sometimes little, most of the time none.

There are times when I try to force myself to have an interest, and it doesn't happen. So if it is just a psychological block that prevents me from having a libido, it is an unconscious one.

[HairyHarry (imported)]

i had a wet dream last night........

Lucky you! As far as I know, I've never had a wet dream!

[Uncle Flo (imported)]

Lucky you! As far as I know, I've never had a wet dream!

Nor have I. --FLO--