Straight men in sexless marraiges considering chemical castration

[gadzoocs (imported)]

I started a blog at http://www.myspace.com/sexlessmarraige that may be of interest to men in a sexless marraige. I began a self-prescribed treatment of androcur 3 months ago and decided to chronical how I am doing as well as some background information as to why I began self medicating. I also talk a bit about the side effects that I've experienced so far. There is also a long, rambling prologue that I wrote a few years ago, to get a sense of where I came from.

For true eunuchs, my gay and trans brethren, and others, it may not be worth your time, but for the curious, frustrated married man, I wrote this because it is the sort of thing I wish I could have read prior to my treatment.

[mrt (imported)]

I started a blog at http://www.myspace.com/sexlessmarraige that may be of interest to men in a sexless marraige. I began a self-prescribed treatment of androcur 3 months ago and decided to chronical how I am doing as well as some background information as to why I began self medicating. I also talk a bit about the side effects that I've experienced so far. There is also a long, rambling prologue that I wrote a few years ago, to get a sense of where I came from.

For true eunuchs, my gay and trans brethren, and others, it may not be worth your time, but for the curious, frustrated married man, I wrote this because it is the sort of thing I wish I could have read prior to my treatment.

I think you wrote some very though provoking stuff. I would not attempt to argue with you but my take on two (oops tree) parts is different. I applaud your telling your story. I think that regardless how we might agree or not on what you've done I think it takes guts to tell others.

I found the Lions bit very interesting and yes there ARE men that act that way. (My brother in law comes to mind) but there are also so many more that are more then animalistic desire. I listened to a very interesting pod cast of a woman who made up her mind to transition to male. She (now he) started on a dose of injectable testosterone and was overcome with sexual desire and started seeing in her (now him) self all the stereotypical "bad male" behaviours. What she experienced was a form of male puberty that was quite overwhelming at first. Then the reason and logic in her took charge and she (now he) matured and became a non "bad male"

When I had my own rebirth of HRT I felt very much like I was having a second puberty. However having had that once before and made an ass of myself it was greatly reduced. I think that there clearly are people who surrender to their fuel. And to some extent women can suffer from this as well.

Is it our "id" is it the "holy" part of us? I can't say for sure but I at least am not just a combo of hormones. I think it gives me much more then a desire to "mate" but I acknowledge that some men don't need hormones to function as I seem to.

The second part that I wanted to comment on was the options available to your wife. In your soap box you said "they could treat my wife with bottles of pain medication, or have us go into sexual therapy, or try a variety of other solutions."

In other solutions I would include hormone therapy for any wife with low or no sex drive. If her sex drive was broken and could be fixed. What would that hurt? And having been around many menopausal women as of late I can't imagine how this won't improve the quality of their lives not just the men who want them in a sexual manner.

You asked if you should tell your wife that your taking drugs that chemicaly castrate you (As she might be wondering why your sporting tons of hair) I think you should and see what her reaction is. Perhapes she will say "Thank God - I was so sick of having sex 4 times a year" or maybe she will say "Ok, we need to talk. I think I need to work on my sex drive not have you shut yours off." Either way I think anything that might impact your relationship like that should be shared. I also URGE you as a friend to confide to your MD what your doing and have him/her monitor you for health issues such as liver problems. Its not worth your life to go on a sex diet. And I think I can assure you that your Doctor will keep your issue confidential and will do his or her best to keep you healthy.

Oh! One last thing. I think the concept of sex = procreation is invalid for some. My wife and I have our family 100% from adoption and find it very rewarding. We also finding sex to be very rewarding and I'm of course not even slightly able to procreate.

[gadzoocs (imported)]

Great comments and I appreciate the 2nd point of view on what I've written. I hope others will take the opportunity to join the dialog. Taking issue is ultimately going to help anyone who reads the blog.

[mrt (imported)]

Great comments and I appreciate the 2nd point of view on what I've written. I hope others will take the opportunity to join the dialog. Taking issue is ultimately going to help anyone who reads the blog.

I enjoy this kind of "debate" the flaming and so forth never did much for me.

One book I think you might enjoy that "might" help your wife regain her sex drive is called "Hormone Hell to Hormone Well" and they talk at length about sex drive, the various hormones that are available and why some are good and others highly questionable.