DP on the way

[consideringthecut (imported)]

Your post is very interesting. I'm wondering - do you think your use of DP has changed your testosterone output long term? For example did you notice any atrophy of your testicles?...

I measured beforehand, so I'll check them again and report back.

Is your wife happier with you in your current mode? ie is your sex drive now more (or less) compatable with hers?

She hasn't said that she's not happier, but I'll quiz her and get back to you. She's definitely aware that things are not as they were, but I'm not sure that that's all bad in her view.

[mrt (imported)]

My wife was able to point out some of the problems I was having pre HRT that got me to seek help. I think Menopause for women was very much like what I went through and perhapes an un-connected observer is the way to judge how it goes. Good luck and Happy Christmas!

[consideringthecut (imported)]

...D

id you notice any atrophy of your testicles?

Prior to DP, my testicles both measured about 1 5/8" long and 1" in diameter. The length is the same, but the diameter does seem 1/8" (right) and 1/4" (left) smaller. They seem softer and squishier than before.

My libido has picked up more since my last post, and it seems like it's close to normal now.

[mrt (imported)]

It sounds like the Depo caused your testes to shut down and shrink a bit. Glad you have them returning to normal.

[consideringthecut (imported)]

Quite a while since my last post. I'd say my libido has definitely picked up again but it's not out of control. My wife and I are having intercourse three to five times per week. I find myself wanting her to wear thongs/g-strings, have the majority of her pubic hair removed via laser, wear lingerie more, and have thought about asking to try anal intercourse again. These are all "classic" issues that I've dealt with in the past. I haven't voiced any of these desires and plan to keep my big trap shut. I've also had recurring thoughts about what it would be like to be married to another woman. This also is a "classic" issue for me. Looking at other women in a lustful way (taking a long second look or even a long first look) has not been an issue, but I make a very conscious decision not to. No masturbation, porn, demands for performance or other issues. I still have one dose of DP left and have been considering using it. I mentioned it to my wife a few weeks back and she seemed pretty nonplussed. I think I will continue to stay the course and try and set up an

appointment with the endocrinologist

when I think I can't take it any more. It would been interesting to know what my T level is at that point. Once I know that, I'll consider what an effective booster shot regimen is for me.

Overall I continue to be very pleased with the effect of DP for me. The effects in my case were very long lasting.

More as the story develops.

[keyman419 (imported)]

I too have tried DP just simply to eliminate a very small libido. I found that once a month injections were suffient to keep the issues suppressed for me. It took about 2-3 months for things to return to normal. If you like where you are at, you will probably want to consider an injection every 4-6 weeks and this will keep things balanced. I am encouraged to hear that you are doing so well.

Joe

[mrt (imported)]

Quite a while since my last post. I'd say my libido has definitely picked up again but it's not out of control. My wife and I are having intercourse three to five times per week. I find myself wanting her to wear thongs/g-strings, have the majority of her pubic hair removed via laser, wear lingerie more, and have thought about asking to try anal intercourse again. These are all "classic" issues that I've dealt with in the past. I haven't voiced any of these desires and plan to keep my big trap shut. I've also had recurring thoughts about what it would be like to be married to another woman. This also is a "classic" issue for me. Looking at other women in a lustful way (taking a long second look or even a long first look) has not been an issue, but I make a very conscious decision not to. No masturbation, porn, demands for performance or other issues. I still have one dose of DP left and have been considering using it. I mentioned it to my wife a few weeks back and she seemed pretty nonplussed. I think I will continue to stay the course and try and set up an

[quote="consideringthecut (imported)

" time=1187426580]
appointment with the endocrinologist

when I think I can't take it any more. It would been interesting to know what my T level is at that point. Once I know that, I'll consider what an effective booster shot regimen is for me.

Overall I continue to be very pleased with the effect of DP for me. The effect
[/quote]
s in my case were very long lasting.

More as the story develops.

When I started on HRT and got it adjusted for normal adult levels I had a big shift in my sex drive as well. I think by reading your posts that your troubled by these desires. Taking these one at a time.

Lingerie. Have you talked to your wife about it and if so what is her opinion about switching to more exotic clothing? Is it "possible" that she might think this is a good idea if you enjoy it? Is it possible there is some compromise that would please both of you? For example her throwing the "granny pants" and buying more eye appealing things?

Anal Sex. Again, if you spoke to her about it and asked her is it possible she would be for trying this and maybe incorporating it as part of your sex life?

Pubic Hair. Has she every shaved there? Have you? If you offered to do this for her in some sexual "scene" would she be revolted or excited or what? Have you offered to pay to have a salon do this for her?

None of those three items is that out there in as far as what (I think) the typical person does in the bedroom.

I guess I can't suggest you ask her about you doing another woman but trust me most guys with healthy levels of hormones have "looked" at other women with a lustful thought or two. Even former pres Jimmy Carter! The difference here is we don't act on that... That is the difference between a mature guy who has self control and a "kid" with out of control hormones who does whatever feels good with who ever he can find who is willing.

[Tclosetgirl (imported)]

You described how I felt when I was on Androcur - except I was full blown no-erection.

It took almost 2 months to get a FULL erection back - so don't worry if you are looking to get it fully back - getting another within an hour or two now, that's a different story - doesn't happen for me very often and it's been 6 months or more since Androcur.

Hope it is goingwell, I understand your frustration, add that I am a TG in and for me it can be uglier without some release.

Luckily I have an SO that is very much into letting me be femme...

[nullorchis (imported)]

Just read through this thread. It is interesting. I'm relatively new to EA. The quote above by Dr. Seuss led me to wonder how much depends on mind over matter, or matter (Testosterone supplements or T-suppressants) over the mind. No quick test, or fix, like in diabetes. How helpful it could be if we could test our T-count with a simple pin prick in the finger with a digital measurement device, then inject T-add, or T-subtract so that we were at our own personal nominal level of T. Who knows, maybe someday, for the good of all, such a concept will become reality.

Seems as though trying to crank up low sex drive or dial down excessive sex drive, mental or physical, is as difficult as loosing weight or stopping smoking. (Food and nicotine are addictions aren't they?)

Those with too much sex drive have issues; those with too little sex drive have issues. I wonder what percentage of those who make the final cut and become non-chemical eunuchs are without issues. Is the answer to achieve a T-count that matches our mind? Somewhere between zero T and ? T.

This could be an opportunity for some research scientist to get a large government grant. A study to slowly monitor and raise the T-count of low-T afflicted persons until the mind over matter and matter over mind were at peace and in unison. And to slowly monitor and lower the T-count of high T-count afflicted persons mind/matter matter/mind were in balance. I'd volunteer. (I say "afflicted" to mean persons who are unhappy with their mind/matter balance). Each person's desirable T-count would be unique to them. How great it could be if T-count adjustment could eliminate the pain of banding, burdizzo, or just plain mental sexual frustration.

I believe all of us who are serious who use this web site are trying to achieve our own personal optimum T-count so that we can achieve a mind/matter and matter/mind balance. The mental desire to be a eunuch or a nullo, and ultimately turning that desire into a reality might be, for some, unnecessary if one could achieve a personal optimum T-count. Just how much does our T count control our brain, and how much control can our brain have over our T-count. What a debacle.

After much trial and error I finally achieved a below 100 T-count. As seems to be so often the case I lost much that I wanted to loose, and I lost some that I didn't want to loose. Before: endless thinking of sex, constant physical sex, and this detracted from having an otherwise productive life. After: no thinking of sex, virtually impossible to get an erection. But the down side was that I had no interest in my personal passions anymore. Not only did I loose my sex drives (mental and physical) I lost my interest in everything else (non-sexual) that made each day worth living. Last month my Dr. prescribed a T-gel. In just 4 weeks I again get EMHO's (early morning hard ons), I can again ejaculate, I again get aroused from mental thoughts of sex. I won't know my T-count until next month's follow up appointment.

I am beginning to think that mentally I needed to lower my T-count and because it was so high this led me to believe I needed to destroy my testicles, even have them cut off. I was having a matter over mind problem.

With my T-count way low I was having another matter over mind problem.

Now that my T-count is on the way back up, I feel I am on my way to finding some kind of balance. My testicles will never again produce testosterone. But they remain in their sack. Time will tell if I still think I need to have them removed. Its all about achieving a balance between "want" and "need". Is what I want really what I need? Perhaps. Perhaps not. It's obvious such a decision should not be made in haste.

At the moment I still desire to be rid of my balls, but realize I may need T-additives to achieve a personal balance. I feel a lot of empathy for those who don't have a desire to be a eunuch but are traumatized by the loss of a ball or two from an accident or cancer. That would be tough. At least eunuchs and we eunuch-wannabes have an opportunity to be more in control of our lives than those who loose a testicle against their wishes. But its so important to make the right decision for there is no going back. In a way there is no going back for me since my balls no longer make T. It's 60-40 right now on what to do about them.