The ten commandments

[colin (imported)]

Commandment 1

Marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.

Commandment 2

If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word

you say, talk in your sleep.

Commandment 3

Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!

Commandment 4

Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the

man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks

and the man listens.

In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

Commandment 5

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of

one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.

Commandment 6

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts

when they try to decide which one.

Commandment 7

Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about

something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

Commandment 8

Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and

a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.

Commandment 9

Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. That is why wives

treat husbands like toxic waste.

Commandment 10

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

Bonus (Story)

A long married couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned

over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish

too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.

The husband was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It really

works!"

[Kusanagi (imported)]

lol, quite funny

[jehan (imported)]

lol and ,in other times, I was married! something real: I opened the door of my car to my wife..... : the car was new!!!!

[Riverwind (imported)]

Commandment 3

Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!

but when I was married she got all my pay check, after she only got half.

River

[bagman (imported)]

Unfortunately us guys have our brains in our dicks, to ride or not to ride that is the question, but having ridden the price has to be paid, the price is too high I hear you say, well my friends that is the price of a ride that is too high!! In one way or another we guys always pay, the moral of the story is keep your dick in your pocket always presupposing the pocket is big enough.