To see if it suits me

[Riven (imported)]

This is my first post and I want to start by saying a great big thank you to everyone who has contributed to this forum. Having had breast cancer twice, my 54 year old wife is now taking Arimidex for the forseeable future. When we do try sex it doesn't work too well as she becomes sore very quickly (even with plenty of lube) due to having no oestrogen to maintain her vagina. She feels no need for orgasm and can't really see the point in trying to have one. On the other hand, being fit and 52 (you guessed it) I still have a strong sex drive. This is not good as the frustration is making me feel like looking elsewhere for sex. I tried bringing up the subject of testosterone reduction with our doctor but the subject simply isn't one that doctors here in the UK are willing to address. The doctor lightheartedly suggested I have an affair. I really don't want to do this as I am not the kind of guy who can keep love and sex separate. I am therfore about to try chemical castration. My first 50 x 50mg cyproterone acetate should arrive any day. My wife and I have read a good few of the threads on this subject and it seems that some EA members have needed more than 100mg per day to get the effect they wanted. However I'd prefer to try a starting dose of 1 x 50mg tablet per day. If that is enough to stop erections and sexual frustration, I will then try to reduce my intake of cyproterone to a maintainance dose. Does this sound sensible or does everyone with experience think I'll be wasting my time starting on such a low dose?

I also would like your opinion of the long term affect of Cyproterone use: If I use this drug for a few months, or even a year or two, and then stop taking it, will my sex drive and erectile function recover. Will it have any long term effects?

Riven

[JesusA (imported)]

Hello Riven,

Welcome to the Archive. You are certainly not the first person to arrive here for the purpose you have stated. Neither will you be the last. There are a number of members who have joined here to find information about lowering their libido to match that of their wives.

Chemical castration is certainly a suitable means, as they would attest. Your problem will be finding a doctor who is willing to monitor you once you have begun using the chemicals. There are potential health hazards for ANY chemical that has such profound effects on the body, though the odds of you being affected are relatively small.

One of the long time members here, TerryUK, is much older than you and has traveled much farther down the path you are approaching. He signs himself as “A Contented Eunuch”, which he most certainly is. The day that I spent with Terry and his wife when I was in England was one of the most pleasant of the entire trip.

Terry seldom visits the Archive these days, but I have written directly to him to ask that he read your post and respond, if appropriate. You may want to use the search function here to seek out the many posts that he has made on topics that would be of interest to you.

Best of luck in your journey,

J.

[Riven (imported)]

Thanks J,

I certainly would prefer to be under my doctor's watchful eye, but she was so uncomfortable with the idea when I brought it up that my wife and I thought it unlikely that she'd be willing to prescribe Cyproterone for me. We hope that if I go to her later and say that 'I've been self medicating and it's suiting me ok' she'll be slightly let off the hook and might be more willing to monitor me, and possibly prescribe further cyproterone. (This is assuming that it does suit me and I wish to continue.)

I will do a search for TerryUK's past posts.

All the best

Riven

[TerryUK (imported)]

One of the long time members here, TerryUK, is much older than you and has traveled much farther down the path you are approaching. He signs himself as

“A Contented Eunuch”

, which he most certainly is. The day that I spent with Terry and his wife when I was in England was one of the most pleasant of the entire trip.

Terry seldom visits the Archive these days, but I have written directly to him to ask that he read your post and respond, if appropriate. You may want to use the search function here to seek out the many posts that he has made on topics that would be of interest to you.

J.

I did read Riven's post a week or so ago and I sent him a private message. I have not had a reply. I wonder, did my message get through?

It is now five years since I was diagnosed as having prostate cancer, although in its very early stages and discovered only as a result of having a prostate tissue biopsy. I was on a very short course of cyproterone acetate - just for three weeks - prior to starting on a course of Zoladex LA. This latter drug was given as an implant injected under the skin of my abdomen by a nurse. The active ingredient is goserelin. It is an LHRH agonist. A single injection lasts for 12 weeks. I had the injection repeated every 12 weeks for 12 months. I also had seven weeks of daily sessions of radiotherapy. My PSA level was reduced to less than 0.1.

Because I was on cyproterone for only three weeks, I cannot answer Riven's question as to its long term effects. For those three weeks I was taking one 300 mg tablets three times a day.

One thing that I can say is that on the evening of the day that I picked up the tablets from the pharmacist I read the Patient Instruction Leaflet that came in the carton with the tablets. I read the following words:

"This substance is an antiandrogen. That is, it blocks the actions of male sex homones (androgens). It also reduces the amount of male sex hormones produced by the body."

I was strangley excited by reading those words and hardly slept that night. The next morning I explained to my wife that the effect of the tablets would be that I would become a virtual eunuch. My wife was not upset at this statement.

That happened on January 17, 2002. I liked the way that I felt as a chemical eunuch. I was castrated on September 22, 2003.

It may help Riven to know that I did write to the surgeon in advance of the consultation to discuss my castration. In my letter I set out my reasons for seeking castration. I included, as part of my argument, observations posted on the Archive by men who had themselves been surgically castrated. Most importantly, I stated in my letter that my wife would be coming with me to see the surgeon.

The consultation was very brief. The surgeon simply asked me: "Are you sure that you want to go ahead?" I replied: "Yes." The surgeon then looked towards my wife. She nodded her agreement. At this, the surgeon got out his diary and we agreed a date for the surgery.

I have described the actual surgical procedure in postings to the Archive around the date of my castration, September 22, 2003.. It was carried out under a local anaesthetic so that I was fully conscious and aware of what was going off.

Terry (a very contented eunuch)

[Riven (imported)]

Hi Terry,

I didn't get your first PM, but I did just get the 2nd one. (I also just sent you a reply.) Thanks for that Terry.

Hi all,

Since starting this thread I have read a few more (lots more) threads on chemical castration, and it seems to me that different guys need different amounts of cyproterone acetate to achieve their desired effect. But thereby lies a major variable: Some guys are looking to effectively wipe out every trace of sex urge, in which case even a high dose of the drug doesn't always do enough. Whereas other guys are happy with the significantly lowered libido which the drug does seem to be able to provide even at low doses.

I still await delivery of my cyproterone acetate. I still want to use as low a dose as I can, but having read a bit more, I now feel that I should start at 100mg daily for the first fortnight (or however long it takes to reduce my sex urges) then reduce to a maintainance dose.

I'd still appreaciate reaction from guys who have used cyproterone acetate (Androcur) ie. regarding doseage. ie. If a fortnight at 100mg daily doesn't have much/any effect I could either leave it another fortnight before changing dose, or increase to 150mg daily. I'm not sure. Perhaps it will be easier to decide when the time comes?

I'd also like to hear any thoughts regarding the length of time (months? years?) one can stay on this drug before it is likely to have caused permanant changes.

Best wishes to all.

Riven

[Riven (imported)]

Well, it's started!

I went to the Post Office yesterday afternoon to collect a package they were holding for me. It was the cyproterone acetate I had ordered from Inhouse Pharmacy a fortnight ago. The packet had been stopped by customs as there was VAT and a handling charge to pay (totalling £10.72). Kind of made me think I should have ordered more than 60 tablets while I was at it, but not knowing if I'm going to take them for long....

Once I got back to the car I thought 'there's no reason not to start now' so I opened the packet and swallowed my first 50mg tablet. Having been anticipating this for a long time I guess I was a little excited, or nervous, and as I was driving home I found myself wondering if the feeling of 'butterflies' in my guts was simply because of my nervousness. I was beginning to feel strange. My limbs and genitals were feeling a little itchy and I was slightly shaky and feeling a little sick, as though I was in mild shock. My body was reacting to the chemical already? Boy, this is strong stuff! I was pleased to get home and stop as I had been finding it hard to concentrate on the driving.

My wife (I'll call her Mrs Riven) knows all about how hormone fluctuations. Before I go on I want to tell you about her experiences: She first experienced menopausal symptoms (hot flushes, vaginal dryness, loss of libido, reduction of energy, etc.) just before she turned 50 (in the late '90s). Because of a family history of osteoporosis her doctor immediately put her on HRT. To begin with, it was great. Her skin and muscle tone improved and she had a lot more energy. In her own words "It felt like turning the clock back several years". But after 2 or 3 years she felt menopausal again, so she went on a higher dose of HRT, but it didn't make much difference, and as the doctor was worried about the risks, she went back on the lower dose. Then, in November 2003, Mrs Riven found a breast lump. She was immediately told to stop HRT. The lump was diagnosed as cancer, and a nasty one too. The lump was excised along with 14 lymph nodes from her armpit (3 of which had cancer). pathology revealed the breast lump to be a cluster of tumors which means it was more likely to spread rapidly, so Mrs Riven had to go back into surgery a few weeks later for the full mastectomy. It was an oestrogen dependent cancer, so after her courses of chemo and radiotherapy Mrs Riven was put on a 5 year course of Tamoxifen. This plunged her into menopause more deeply still, along with all the usual symptoms. 2 years later (summer 2006) her remaining breast turned bright red. This turned out to be inflammatory breast cancer - a rare cancer that usually doesn't respond to treatment. She was given more chemo - a different one this time - and started a year’s course of Herceptin. Thankfully, the cancer has responded so well that she was offered a mastectomy and lymph node removal (something that wouldn’t have been worth doing had the drug treatment not worked. When she finished chemo the oncologist started her on Arimidex (an alternative to Tamoxifen), so Mrs Riven has once again been plunged into menopause. But this time I’m joining her.

Last night we went to bed together and had sex. We both felt like taking advantage of a hard cock before it becomes a thing of the past. I had a rough night though. I wasn’t expecting hot flushes to start immediately, but thats flushes what was keeping me awake last night. I just couldn’t get comfortable. My legs sometimes felt hot and prickly, and I just couldn’t work out if I was feeling hot or cold.

I have decided to take 50mg cyproterone daily for the time being and see how I feel after a couple of weeks before adjusting the dose. I have a feeling that other guys have started on unnecessarily high doses in their impatience for impotence. I realise that even after physical castration a lot of guys can still get it up - even if only a little. Well, thats ok. My objective is to stop my cock from trying to lead me astray. That should be possible without the need to totally purge my body of testosterone.

We had a walk in the sunshine today. I was feeling surprisingly well and relaxed. I wasn’t expecting that after so little sleep. I had a rest after lunch and slept soundly for an hour or two. I hope I sleep that well tonight. We’ll see.

[DonnyMac (imported)]

Rivin,

I have been on depo-provera for almost a year and for similar reasons. I do find I can have sex, but don't crave it. Something that made my wife a huge fan of chemical castration. I also found I got to sleep much better with less anxiety and fustration -- almost zero. It is nice to not be guided by drive and more guided by emotion and wanting a strong bond.

Good luck with the new you.

Don

[Riven (imported)]

Thanks Don,

It will be a while before I know if I like the new me more than the old me, but I do feel different already and not entirely in a bad way. Within hours of starting on cyproterone I found myself letting out big breaths. I felt my shoulders drop and I realised I was feeling quite relaxed. I have always had a somewhat anxious personality so this is very new for me.

The down side at the moment is being very uncomfortable in bed at night with hot prickly legs being the most irritating aspect of the 'hot flushes'. My wife thinks that the hot flushes should reduce once my body gets used to the new hormone levels, but until then it won't be fun.

My only real concern at this stage is to safeguard myself from loss of bone density. I have never had a bone density scan but as I am muscular and fit I expect my bones are in good shape too. Naturally I want them to stay that way so I'll be doing the right diet, load bearing exercise, etc. but will it be enough? My wife has to take Fosomax (alendronic acid) to combat the osteoporosis which she inherited from her mother and grandmother. It's good to know that osteoporosis can be treated, but without doubt prevention is better than cure - My wife's mother had several crush fractures in her spine before her doctor referred her to a bone specialist. She's on alendronic acid now and her bone density has recovered, but the crush fractures have left her a hunchback. It's a terrible shame. If I do decide that life as a eunuchs suits me, I'll definitely be asking my doctor to refer me for a bone scan and I won't be leaving it too long either.

[DonnyMac (imported)]

Good idea to get a bone density scan. It was one of the first thing my doctor did, get a baseline. I will get another in a few months, one year later, to compair. I am on 4 tablets a day of 315mg Calcium/200 units vitamin D per tablet to ward off bone loss. I will know in June how it works. As for being relaxed, I noticed it within a few weeks. I am not sure how much is that "eunuch calm" and how much is not being fustrated.

Don

[mrt (imported)]

Good idea to get a bone density scan. It was one of the first thing my doctor did, get a baseline. I will get another in a few months, one year later, to compair. I am on 4 tablets a day of 315mg Calcium/200 units vitamin D per tablet to ward off bone loss. I will know in June how it works. As for being relaxed, I noticed it within a few weeks. I am not sure how much is that "eunuch calm" and how much is not being fustrated.

Don

I'm on HRT but my doc also told me to start taking the same amount of Vit D? I wondered why at the time but she was running thru other stuff at the same time. And idea?