Respecting the motivations of others, but adding my own to the mix - for me personally one of the benefits of being a eunuch is that I never have to think about dating or relationships formed around any kind of physical intimacy every again.
Years before I understood that I was a eunuch I was already drifting away from the idea of “relationships” and stopped having sex of any kind. Stopped going to places where people might try to encourage that to happen. Removed myself from any conversations with people who wanted those things to happen. Ignored the opposition of those who thought there was something wrong with ME because I didn’t want what they were offering.
COVID lockdown showed me my “preferred state” and that I am happiest living in my own solitude.
Learning I was a eunuch made that make sense.
Pursuing surgery makes it not only ok, but also that I will never apologize or try to explain it ever again.
Now that I’ve grown much much deeper in my eunuch identity I feel a profound, existential relief that I never have to “date” or pursue/maintain relationships like that ever again. And I will be overjoyed when I get to have the surgery that makes it “final.” And that feeling only gets stronger every day. I never have to second guess it.
Personally, while respecting others, I can say I don’t really understand how one can simultaneously desire being a eunuch and still desire or expect “sexual intimacy” after completing the hard work of “disabling” themselves. While I understand most people’s need for some kind of validation and companionship, the concept of desiring sex while also desiring the removal of the parts that enable it seem irreconcilably opposed…?
That's exactly right! I can testify to this.
