Surprised by A Girl Crush

[andrew2005 (imported)]

Well, I knew it would happen in time, even I, the gayest most erotic guy in new hampshire, finally had a girl crush XD

I know, i know, it's so weird! But now that i think about it, retrospectively, last summer i hung out a lot with this really awesome girl, and we became pretty good friends, until she moved back to Cali, but whatever, i'm over it, but the point is that at the time i didn't recognize my emotional attraction to her, but now i do! It's so weird, but i feel like we could have actually dated and i would have enjoyed kissing her and holding hands and talking and shit, but i still can't really seriously think about the sex, cause that's just not a line i would be comfortable to cross with a woman.

Alas, i must know! Is there any other gay men out there who have fallen for a girl emotionally? Cause it was really confusing at the time...XD

[ssindysmith2002 (imported)]

Have you ever heard the term BI SEXUAL? I was for years confused about my sexual orientation. I was having mixed feels about dating guys but I found that I enjoyed having sex with men and liked the feelings I have towards men, at the same time I had strong feelings towards women but I enjoy have sex with woman along with the emotional bond. So there you have it I am Bi Sexual and I don't loss any sleep over it.

[andrew2005 (imported)]

Yeah, i know about bisexuality, but see with me it's always been an attraction to men, not even a glimmer of hope for the gals. And i'm not a virgin either, i had sex with a guy for the first time when i was 15 years old, and i'm 18 now, and i've know i was gay since 7th grade (and retrospectively i can look at past actions, such as checking out the boy's new jeans on the first days of school and never the girls' outfits) and im definitely not bisexual.

It just caught me by surprise, that's all, and it's not so much im losing sleep over it as much as intrigued that even i, gayest of the gay, could be attracted to a girl. ^_^

cheers,

andrew william

[andrew2005 (imported)]

Good advice, i like the way you think! XD I just sounded like a 1950s newspaper editor, and i think i liked it ^_^ Well, i doubt a Flaming Nun could ever give bad advice anyways

[A-1 (imported)]

Well, Andrew,

I suppose that you can love anybody.

Sex is something that is a different "loving" but it is not that different. I mean, you can love somebody without having sex with them just the same as you can have sex with somebody without loving them.

Ask yourself why you would not love somebody just because they were female. Then ask yourself why you would not have sex with somebody just because they were female.

Then decide if it is in you to be monogamous, regardless of is it was Gay monogamy or straight monogamy.

If you can restrict yourself to one partner, is it really that important if is a male or a female, as long as you love them and care for them? Unless you are a promiscuous dog, I would say that you could restrict youself to one person.

I think our society puts WAY to much pressure on people to proclaim their GAYNESS of STRAIGHTNESS.

You know, I love lots of people, FEMALE AND MALE. But, the difference is that I only have sex with my wife.

What I am trying to say is if you love this person enough to have a monogamous sexual relationship with them, then take a chance on LOVE.

I was not sorry that I did...35 years ago...

A-1

[JesusA (imported)]

The key observation is that the entire field of sex and gender is far more complex than simple polar opposites would indicate: male/female, gay/straight, sexual/asexual, etc. The real world has many dimensions with people scattered at every place between the polar descriptions.

What is important is that you not be afraid to see where your feelings might lead you. Just because you think that you are 100% "gay" doesn't mean that you can't love a woman. Maybe not sexually, but love is far greater than simple sexual attraction.

The capacity for, and need for, love are programmed into all humans. Giving and receiving a solid hug is good for you in many ways.

[andrew2005 (imported)]

The key observation is that the entire field of sex and gender is far more complex than simple polar opposites would indicate: male/female, gay/straight, sexual/asexual, etc. The real world has many dimensions with people scattered at every place between the polar descriptions.

What is important is that you not be afraid to see where your feelings might lead you. Just because you think that you are 100% "gay" doesn't mean that you can't love a woman. Maybe not sexually, but love is far greater than simple sexual attraction.

The capacity for, and need for, love are programmed into all humans. Giving and receiving a solid hug is good for you in many ways.

Yeah, i know there are a lot of levels, and that no one is just straight/just gay, but i am predominantly gay, so it came as a surprise, and it also came after she left for Cali, so i couldn't really go to Cali ^_^ But i'm sure i'd have persued a relationship if she had stayed...le sigh.

But i'm over it by now, and i have my eye on a certain guy in my Anatomy class ^o~

[A-1 (imported)]

Well Andrew,

I suppose that you could consider a GIRL as just a GUY after a sex change.



A-1

[Muffer (imported)]

What suprised me was how many girls came on to me after I was casterated.

Muffer

[JeffEunuch (imported)]

Yeah, i know there are a lot of levels, and that no one is just straight/just gay, but i am predominantly gay, so it came as a surprise, and it also came after she left for Cali, so i couldn't really go to Cali ^_^ But i'm sure i'd have persued a relationship if she had stayed...le sigh.

But i'm over it by now, and i have my eye on a certain guy in my Anatomy class ^o~

What makes you gay is not that you might identify at an emotional level with someone of the other gender and like people of the other gender, but that you're attracted sexually to people of the same sex. I'm gay even though there are women I like. Women just don't turn my crank sexually.