why do i feel this way

[sag111 (imported)]

I have often wondered why i somtimes feel down on myself and why i feel less then.But as i look back on my childhood i remember being called stupid and you are never going to amount to anything more then i care to want to remember it.But its still their and so that part of my past is still their to haunt me and to let me know it will always be a part of me no matter how hard i try to distance myself from it.

I also relize that their are things that i have done and will do because of this thing we call our past.I am just courious how others see themselves and how the past has formed their lives for the good or bad of it

[Slammr (imported)]

I have often wondered why i somtimes feel down on myself and why i feel less then.But as i look back on my childhood i remember being called stupid and you are never going to amount to anything more then i care to want to remember it.But its still their and so that part of my past is still their to haunt me and to let me know it will always be a part of me no matter how hard i try to distance myself from it.

I also relize that their are things that i have done and will do because of this thing we call our past.I am just courious how others see themselves and how the past has formed their lives for the good or bad of it

We are all a sum of all we have experienced. It's difficult -- but not impossible -- to overcome abuse we receive as children. I've no doubt that I would be a different person, had I a different father. It does no good, however, to dwell on that. All we can do is to forgive that person and to go on with our lives the best we can, realizing that it's often one step backwards for every two we take forward. Try to focus on the present, rather than the past. There's nothing we can do about the past, anyway. It's over and done.

[sag111 (imported)]

You know i dont blame anyone my father just taught the way he was taught so i understand that.But the inner feelings are still their and as i understand this it has still shaped who i am inside.I have done a fair job of hiding this on the outside but now and again the buttens are pushed and thies feelings and thoughts come back to haunt me.I am not crying poor me i guess i am trying to cope with this and some feed back

[surf_toad (imported)]

you are truely my brother and we have walked many of the same miles only in a different time and way. i too, have done the best i can to hold it all together and live this lie that society calls a normal life and i will, as you are, never be happy in doing so.

i cannot tell you why it has to be this way, but it just does. i am looking forward to seeing you this summer and hanging out on the fishing pier and just talk about nothing. Maybe there is a reason for all of this, maybe there is not. Anyway i love you brother.

[JesusA (imported)]

Sag,

We’re all burdened by our past in many ways: what was done us, what we did to others, what we didn’t do for others when we had the chance to help. There is no way that we can ever escape our past.

Buddhists, of course, believe that all is intertwined and interconnected. We cannot escape the past, but we can, and must affect the future. It is our deeds today and tomorrow that change the burden that we carry from the past.

I have watched your posts on the Archive since you arrived here. You are so clearly a kind, caring, and loving person. You have gone out of your way to help others and to provide support for those in need. In the ultimate scheme of life, that is what is most important about you. That defines who you really are.

Jesus Angel Azevado

(Your friendly Archive Buddhist)

[Paolo]

Sag,

I often feel the same way.

It seems that Life has turned into a never-ending battle with everything, and I'm really getting tired of it.

For what it's worth, I can relate.

It takes every bit of what I've got just to open the door in the morning and go outside to do it all over again.

Hang in there, is all I can say.

[philip1 (imported)]

Dad

I call you that because you are my guide and mentor. Your love for all is hard to ignore and that is what i love about you. the past can be painfull and haunting, I know mine haunts me everyday. but it just is the spice that makes us who we are instead of robots.

thanks Dad for all your help with my journey and thanks most for being a great friend

[Robby (imported)]

Sag,

I have a firm belief; do not spend energy on negative thoughts, actions of others, and the past.

To spend energy on the negative deprives you of the wonderful and good of the positive.

Look at it this way. Is there anything you can do to change the past?

If you think there is, then do it and move forward. Now that you changed the past, be happy.

If you cannot change the past, concentrate on good thoughts and move forward.

If you concentrate on negative thoughts, you will not be happy no matter what anyone here says. We all have negative in our past.

That is human nature

[Slammr (imported)]

Being happy is a choice each of us can make. As has been said by many people posting in this thread, don't focus on those things which make you sad. Focus instead, on those which bring you joy. As one great philosopher (Gus in Lonesome Dove ) said, "Lorna darling, you have to enjoy the little things, a good cup of coffee or a good companion."

He was telling her that going to San Francisco wou wouldn't bring her happiness. Happiness comes from within, not from without. Each of us can decide to be happy, despite whatever is going on in our lives. That doesn't mean it's easy. Actually, it's damn hard work, but it's really the only choice any of us have.

Remember those times when you were happy. Recall the feeling you felt then. Don't just remember being happy; recall the physical sensation of happiness. As I said, this isn't easy. You have to practice it daily. If you're not happy, you have no one to blame, but yourself. HAPPINESS COMES FROM WITHIN, NOT FROM WITHOUT . Cherries are full of pits, but you don't have to bite into them to enjoy the sweet meat of the cherries. Life is full of pits, but also full of sweet cherries. Spit out the pits; enjoy the cherries.

What I'm talking about is different from clinical depression. If one is suffering from that, he needs medical help. He's probably suffering from a chemical imbalance which probably can only be eased chemically-at least in the short term.

PRACTICE BEING HAPPY

[sag111 (imported)]

Thanks for your replys on this because this life has been very happy at times and at times very sad.All my life i put myself down in front of my family because this was the only way i could get any effection or attention so i thought.But now as i can see clearier i know this was very distructive and i dont think i will do this again. I am not looking for sympathy here but just relizing who i have been for all thies years and i know the past will always be with me but now it dosent have to controal me.I started this thread so just maybe someone else will see their past and how it is effecting their life in the distructive way i let mine controal me.