With super-human strength she dragged him down the stairs, out the back door, and into the tool shed in the back yard and put his penis in a vice.
She secured it tightly and removed the handle from the vice. Next she picked up the hacksaw. The husband was terrified, and screamed "Stop! Stop! You're not going to cut it off, are you?"
The wife with a gleam of revenge in her eye, PUT THE SAW IN HER HUSBAND's HAND, and said "Nope, I'm going to set the shed on fire! You do whatever you have to do."