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[TheHavier (imported)]

I have been really hesitant about posting this here. But, guys like me are around here, they just don't say alot. The few pms I've gotten have been meaningful. So, for the curious middle aged guys out there looking to get your sex drive down to that of the menopausal woman you love, this is for you. After years of thought and research, my wife and i have decided that its time for me to get castrated. Too much frustration from both of us, and its interfering with the quality of our marriage. This process was started a couple years ago and put on hold, so when we made the decision in June, it didn't take as long to complete the process. All the hoops have been cleared. I will be castrated on the morning of Aug. 28th. If I understand how the process works in the surgeon's office, i will show up at 7 am, and by somewhere around 9 am, I will be a eunuch. For the past couple weeks, there's been nothing to do but wait. I don't like waiting. Any advice from those who have been through the process is welcome.

[FloridaEunuch (imported)]

I'm curious, what are your plans for hormone replacement post orchiectomy?

[TheHavier (imported)]

I'm going to try without. Castration is the goal here. However, I do have an appointment with my endocrinologist within a few months. If I need to go on a small amount of something I will.

[WheelyFixed]

I have been really hesitant about posting this here. But, guys like me are around here, they just don't say alot. The few pms I've gotten have been meaningful. So, for the curious middle aged guys out there looking to get your sex drive down to that of the menopausal woman you love, this is for you. After years of thought and research, my wife and i have decided that its time for me to get castrated. Too much frustration from both of us, and its interfering with the quality of our marriage. This process was started a couple years ago and put on hold, so when we made the decision in June, it didn't take as long to complete the process. All the hoops have been cleared. I will be castrated on the morning of Aug. 28th. If I understand how the process works in the surgeon's office, i will show up at 7 am, and by somewhere around 9 am, I will be a eunuch. For the past couple weeks, there's been nothing to do but wait. I don't like waiting. Any advice from those who have been through the process is welcome.

Your description sounds about like my experience - basically it's about the same sort of prep as they make you do for any other sort of outpatient surgery or a colonoscopy (minus the "Cleanout") no food starting the night before, no liquids the day of... Show up and do all the 'wiring' and other prep and then it's in and out in just a few minutes, wait till the anesthesia wears off and go home a few ounces lighter....

They did me under a light general, but I've heard of others being done under a local, either way not a big deal. Post op, I just did OTC pain killers - one nurse suggested that Naproxen (Alleive) was better than some of the others for reducing the swelling.... Ice packs are also suggested.

Will you be getting the scrotum taken off as well? (I did and recommend it, but it isn't always an option...) I was very 'undersized' to start with and because I have to catheterize (both related to my SCI) I had them put in a Foley, which I should have left in longer as I had so much swelling the next few days after that I wasn't able to do my normal procedure so I had to go to the ER so they could put a Foley back in.... However I'd expect more typically sized guys would not have a problem...

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress...

WheelyFixed

[TheHavier (imported)]

Wheely, I'm keeping the scrotum. It was an option i decided against, in part because of some of the information posted by yourself and others that had the scrotum removed at the same time. I have to appear normal in a short amount of time. Reading recovery accounts from those that had scrotecomy and those that had a simple orchi, recovery seemed easier for those with the simple orchi, and that was my deciding factor. And I thought, if I like having the sac left, good. If it turns out to be a problem, i can get rid of it later. Thanks for all the info you've shared. It's been helpful.

[WheelyFixed]

Wheely, I'm keeping the scrotum. It was an option i decided against, in part because of some of the information posted by yourself and others that had the scrotum removed at the same time. I have to appear normal in a short amount of time. Reading recovery accounts from those that had scrotecomy and those that had a simple orchi, recovery seemed easier for those with the simple orchi, and that was my deciding factor. And I thought, if I like having the sac left, good. If it turns out to be a problem, i can get rid of it later. Thanks for all the info you've shared. It's been helpful.

You are welcome... I would agree that if fast recovery is needed, keeping the scrotum is probably a better choice.

All the reports I've seen of folks getting a simple orchie have said that as long as you don't have an unusual complication it is very quick recovery w/ minimal discomfort. Those that have had separate surgeries have said the scrotectomy was more painful and took longer to heal. My experience is that I didn't really notice the orchie compared to the scrotectomy, which is consistent. To me the big advantage of having both done at the same time was only needing to get one surgery, and not having to deal w/ insurance or the expense of doing two operations...

I haven't done any sort of count, but my definite impression was and is that most that just had the simple orchie, especially if they didn't do implants, ended up either getting the scrotum done later, or wished they could.

However it is totally your choice, there is no "right" decision...

WheelyFixed

[TheHavier (imported)]

Wheely, thanks for the info. The cost difference between the two was minimal. I had to give serious consideration. The heal time was the major deciding factor, but i also read that the empty scrotum can be sensitive after the fact, that also went into the decision. My wife, bless her heart, was worried about how i would cope with having nothing left there, but said the decision was mine.

How did your SO cope with you getting fixed? My wife supports the decision and is looking forward to the castration "taking" but is having feelings of guilt for us needing to get it done. She agreed that it was the right choice when she lived with me being so frustrated by not having more sex. It takes a lot to keep me satisfied! Besides, she can't help what the menopause is doing to her, and the uterine prolapse has made things painful! She can do noting about that! But I can! And I don't mind!

Has the castration helped your relationship? When I first talked with the psych a couple years ago, he wouldn't suggest the orchi. Said we should both get checked out. When we did and with the problems we're facing, he said he thought it would help us. He has delt with as many as 6 guys a year in similar situations. The surgeon that's cutting me cuts between 1 and 4 guys a month. Half of them are trans women, but the other half are straight guys. More than half of those are middle aged married men looking to level their sex drive with that of their wife. You don't hear about this stuff, but we are not alone. I sure do feel like it alot though.

[WheelyFixed]

Wheely, thanks for the info. The cost difference between the two was minimal. I had to give serious consideration. The heal time was the major deciding factor, but i also read that the empty scrotum can be sensitive after the fact, that also went into the decision. My wife, bless her heart, was worried about how i would cope with having nothing left there, but said the decision was mine.

How did your SO cope with you getting fixed? My wife supports the decision and is looking forward to the castration "taking" but is having feelings of guilt for us needing to get it done. She agreed that it was the right choice when she lived with me being so frustrated by not having more sex. It takes a lot to keep me satisfied! Besides, she can't help what the menopause is doing to her, and the uterine prolapse has made things painful! She can do noting about that! But I can! And I don't mind!

Has the castration helped your relationship? When I first talked with the psych a couple years ago, he wouldn't suggest the orchi. Said we should both get checked out. When we did and with the problems we're facing, he said he thought it would help us. He has delt with as many as 6 guys a year in similar situations. The surgeon that's cutting me cuts between 1 and 4 guys a month. Half of them are trans women, but the other half are straight guys. More than half of those are middle aged married men looking to level their sex drive with that of their wife. You don't hear about this stuff, but we are not alone. I sure do feel like it alot though.

My GF says she still doesn't understand but is OK with it on the "your body, your choice" respect grounds.... My situation wasn't a 'libido matching" one like yours is, so our sex lives weren't a big factor... It is possible though that it may have become a driver if I hadn't gotten hurt.

Castration was always sort of a secret fantasy for as long as I can remember, but I'd thought it was just that, and really wasn't aware that it was a thing people actually did in current times... I learned it was and eventually ended up here on EA making the journey somewhat by accident, namely following a 'link trail' from a non-related topic, and found it "clicked" as something I needed but hadn't been aware that I did...

I had a lot of frustration since I got hurt, as my injury left me in this weird state where I could get right up to the 'edge' and then NOTHING, like the film broke.... It got so I quit trying because of the frustration. Between that and probably some of the other meds I am on I essentially stopped getting any erections and shrank to pre-pubescent dimensions... But they found my T was low, so put me on a supplement for bone health which left me wanting but unable... When I learned that I had options which would get rid of the desire, it was totally a "YES" moment...

My GF by coincidence hit menopause while I was in rehab, and has since developed enough other medical issues that sex wouldn't be a thing for her even if I was still a young studly sort, so being fixed isn't really a big deal for us. We still cuddle some (less than I'd like...) but that's about it physically. I think being fixed and on E helps in terms of keeping me a bit less irritable and angry and better at dealing with all the stresses that come with being the MORE able member of a multi-disability household...

WheelyFixed

[TheHavier (imported)]

Wheely, that's a rough place to be. You must be one tough customer.

[WheelyFixed]

Wheely, that's a rough place to be. You must be one tough customer.

It was (and is) a tough thing to deal with and I had a very dark period when I first got hurt, (probably not helped by the docs getting me hooked on fentanyl, as I didn't really come out of it until I quit cold turkey) but you learn to make the best of it, as the issues aren't going away and having a cry party doesn't really help....

WheelyFixed